Well, dear readers, here we are on a beautiful Thursday. Last night I went to the Gardenia to see my pals Marcy Heisler and Zina Goldrich, two very talented songwriters who sang a bunch of their very talented songs. They were aided and abetted by Scott Coulter (who sang and played the egg – not at the same time) and one of my regular bass players, Mr. Kenny Wild. It was a delightful evening – and the ladies sang their two most loved songs – Taylor, The Latte Boy and The Alto’s Lament. I was there with the lovely and talented Lisa Richard, the lovely and talented Adryan Russ, and we were joined by the lovely and talented Babbie Green.
Someone forwarded me a certain amusing newsletter from a certain company. I was very appreciative of the lovely comments about me. They were so sweet and positive. There was one line that I thought I should respond to briefly: “We wouldn’t have produced as many albums as we have with Bruce if we weren’t thrilled with him.” I am thrilled that they were thrilled, but the impression given here is that this was some company (the “we”) that hired me off the street to produce “as many albums as we have with Bruce”. I think a simple perusal of any of the press material or the multitude of articles done at the time the company began will reveal that this was not some company (the “we”) that hired me off the street to produce “as many albums as we have with Bruce”. Oops, you’ll have to click on that Unseemly Button below to get the rest of the skinny and/or fat.
The skinny and/or fat continues. No, a simple perusal of the press material or stories will tell you that the “we” (presuming that means “the company”), the company, was the creation and the vision of one person. I think we know who that person is. The vision, the personality, the whole point was all based on this person’s reputation. The projects and the singers were all chosen by this person. The features on the website were all thought of by this person. The very name given to the company was synonymous with this person, as he made up the name and had been using it since 1993 as his internet presence. It was the brainchild of that person, and, in fact, it almost came to be with two whole different sets of players. When those deals fell apart, he went to the people who ended up funding the venture. FUNDING the venture. He is, always has been, and always will be, grateful for the FUNDING of the venture, but the fact that he is no longer part of the company he created and is being treated as some “employee” saddens him greatly. Luckily and happily, the hundreds of supportive e-mails he’s received have been very warming to his heart and very gratifying. As to the pertinent details of what happened subsequently, everyone has their story and maybe one day the stories will be told, maybe not. Certainly, now is not the time for the telling of the stories. I think the spin will be spun and one can spin with the spin or not. As for me, I think it’s time for one of my handy-dandy movie reviews, don’t you?
Our dear reader, Craig Brockman (son of our dear reader, Arnold Brockman) suggested I review the film The Net, starring Sandra Bullock, a film about an evil corporation that steals the lead character’s identity. Frankly, that plot is so far-fetched and it could so never happen that I just couldn’t get with the film. I mean, who would believe such a premise? No, I shall review one of my favorite guilty pleasures, Bert I. Gordon’s Food of The Gods. This is simply one of the worst movies ever made, but it features giant rats run amok, scurrying this way and that way and causing destruction and pain wherever they go. Have you ever seen giant rats run amok causing destruction and pain? It’s really horrifying as presented by that great director Bert I. Gordon. Interestingly, I saw this film in 1976 at the World Theater on Hollywood Blvd. I was, at the time, starring in a television series called Dinah Shore and Her New Best Friends on CBS (a summer replacement for Carol Burnett – I was one of the “friends” as was Diana Canova and Leland Palmer). I remember that one of the comics, Muledeer, was in my dressing room with his girlfriend, an unknown but aspiring actress named Debra Winger. And we all just up and decided to go see Food of the Gods at the World Theater and we howled and hooted and had a great time. You remember yesterday I mentioned my crush on Hayley Mills and Hayley Mills? Well, to tie all this together, one of my very first movie crushes (on someone close to my age) was an actress named Susan Gordon, who played Danny Kaye’s young daughter in The Five Pennies (the “older” version of the daughter was played by yet another early crush of mine, Tuesday Weld, but I can’t write about Tuesday on a Thursday). Oh, how I loved Susan Gordon, she was so cute and perky. And, of course, she was/is the daughter of Food of The Gods’ very own director Bert I. Gordon. I wonder where she is today and what she’s doing. If anyone knows, have her call me. She did attend my high school for awhile, so I did get to know her a teeny bit. I don’t believe Food of The Gods is available on DVD, but it’s probably available on VHS. But Mr. Bert I. Gordon’s masterpiece, Attack of The Puppet People, is available on DVD and is a must have.
Oh, my goodness. Mr. Mark Bakalor is going to be VERY angry with me. Look at the size of that paragraph. That is just too too long and he will bitch slap me from here to eternity. Oh, well, too late to do anything about it now.
Has anyone noticed how large my hand looks in the photo of me at the top of the page? Doesn’t my hand look really large for my head? It looks like the photo was taken by Bert I. Gordon, doesn’t it? That is a VERY large hand, proportionally speaking. That hand looks like it might just engulf my entire head at any minute. What the hell am I talking about?
I’m meeting tonight with my friend David Wechter and his lovely mum Cissy, because I’m going to be directing an all-star benefit in honor of his late father, Julius Wechter. Julius, for those who don’t know, had a wonderful hit group in the late sixties called The Baja Marimba Band. He was a fabulous musician and their albums were wonderful. He was also a fantastic songwriter, and wrote the immortal Spanish Flea (recently used in Shrek!), which was used as the theme for The Dating Game. I’ll post details about dates and performers as they become available. David and I created the story for the film, The Faculty, for those who like trivia.
Well, I do believe it’s time for me to get cracking, whatever the hell that means. Yes, I simply must get cracking, although some would say I have been cracked for some time. Don’t forget to check back every day for your daily dose of ME. Also, leave your comments below. We love your comments, and we simply have not been getting enough of them. And don’t forget, you can peruse the past entries by using the Unseemly Archive Button at the top of this or any other page. Finally, the reaction to the radio show announcement has been great, and we’re all very appreciative. Stay tuned for the exact premiere date, which we’ll announce in the next few days.