Well, dear readers, what the hell did happen yesterday? I will tell you what happened yesterday because who am I not to tell you what happened yesterday after I’ve brought it up? That would be unseemly and we can’t have anything unseemly around here, can we? Mr. Mark Bakalor came over on Friday and while he was here he showed me that stats. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, Mr. Mark Bakalor showed me the stats. Stats, of course, is stats spelled backwards, so who was I to argue with being shown the stats. And what these stats showed was that virtually almost no one came to the site last weekend to read these here notes. That’s what the stats showed. I was so depressed about this that I simply couldn’t write the notes yesterday, just knowing that virtually almost no one would be reading them. But then I thought, if only one person comes here to read them then it is worth writing them – but by then it was too late. And then I got e-mail from people who were disappointed that I hadn’t written them, and now I’m all guilty about not having written them. So, here I am on Sunday, knowing the stats, but writing anyway because I simply will not feel guilty one more second.
The Unseemly Guy Haines Gallery will be open for business quite soon. At least that is what Mr. Mark Bakalor tells me. He has also told me how to do my very own links. Yes, I’m supposed to do my very own links. This is not an easy task for someone such as myself. It’s not as easy as italicizing, for example. For example, italicizing “for example” is easy – I just push Control+Shift+I, and voila – “for example” is italicized. But for links I must sit here and type title and even then I don’t think I’m doing it right, even though that is what Mr. Mark Bakalor wrote on a piece of paper. If I’ve done it wrong it doesn’t really matter since the stats show that virtually almost no one will be reading this.
I’ve already got a headache from typing that link. Speaking of links, have you all eaten your Sunday breakfasts? Link sausages, eggs, toast, bagels, lox, cod, bacon, ham and cereal? I hope so and I hope we are all now feeling our oats. Have you ever felt your oats. How did the oats feel about being felt. After all, oats don’t necessarily want to be felt and here we are feeling them willy-nilly with nary a care in the world for the damn oat. What the hell am I talking about? It doesn’t matter because the stats show that no one is reading this anyway. Well, shall we click on the Unseemly Button to continue? I think we shall, even though the stats show that very few of us will actually be clicking.
Wait! You won’t believe it! Down at the bottom of my Extended (“More”) Entry Text-Optional Box are several shortcut keys and one of them is to add a link. Shall we try it right here and right now? I do believe we shall. So, let’s go visit amazon for example. Holy moley on rye, did you see that? It worked. And I didn’t have to type anything. Isn’t life amazing?
So, I can now link and italicize. I can also be bold and I can also underline. I am now a computer expert. I can LIBU (link,italicize,bold, underline). How many others can LIBU? I think we must all learn how to LIBU and then we can do the LIMBO, which is, I feel, poised for a comeback, along with trampolines and hula hoops.
We are going to be taking a quick survey tomorrow about a feature I’m thinking of adding to the site. So, be sure to visit. And if you missed some of the Posted Comments on Friday, be sure to click the Unseemly Archive Button to read them. Very good Posted Comments.
I will also have some other things to say tomorrow, based on some e-mails I’ve received. Meanwhile, have a beautiful Sunday, and let’s prove those damn stats wrong, shall we?