Well, dear readers, I am writing this entry the night before the day it is to appear. I am doing this because I have an early morning appointment where I will be dealing with annoying things. Once I am done dealing with annoying things I have a lunch meeting where I will be eating whilst meeting. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, I have an eating meeting. Then I will finally get back to my very own home to do my very own things. It is slightly surreal writing tomorrow’s entry today, although today is tomorrow, hence tomorrow is today. This is known as a time/space continuum, but we will pay it no mind. First of all, I’m not paying “it” anything, because “it” hasn’t even used the handy-dandy donation button to make a handy-dandy donation. Consequently, I’m not paying it no mind or anything else. It is just “it” with an “sh” in front of it, out of luck. What the hell am I talking about? Oh, yes, the time/space continuum and we will pay it no mind or anything else of value.
I do hope you’ll take the time to listen to Mr. Donald Feltham’s brand new radio show – just click on the unseemly radio show button over there on your left and you will hear it through the magic of RealAudio or whatever the hell we use here at haineshisway.com. Those matters are far too technical for the likes of me. This week’s show concentrates on all the currently playing musicals in New York, from downtown to uptown. Lots of showtunes from new musicals and revivals.
Tomorrow (the real tomorrow, meaning tomorrow Tuesday, even though the real tomorrow right this minute is tomorrow Monday – but the real tomorrow, meaning tomorrow Tuesday I shall be writing these notes quite early in the morning because then I will be off to Las Vegas, Nevada for a brief respite. I will, in fact, be writing the Wednesday notes “on location” from handy-dandy Las Vegas. If any of our dear readers live in Las Vegas, come visit me at the Orleans Hotel.
Not many people visited today – uh, I mean yesterday. So, click the Unseemly Archive Button to see what important bits of tid you may have missed. I suppose the reason for the light traffic was because you were all recuperating from our big birthday bash of Saturday. Now, just wait a minute here. Just hold the phone here. Just stop the presses here. Just what the hell do I think I’m doing here? This is far too much writing for the Main Entry Text. Oh, dear, oh dear, oh dear, there’ll be a bitch-slapping for sure. I’m giving away the whole damn show here, when I should be teasing and making you salivate and drool to find out just what’s behind that Unseemly Button below. Well, let’s all click on it and find out, shall we?
Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain. Well, I can’t write about what’s happened today because it really isn’t today, so just what the hell am I going to write about? This is the problem with the time/space continuum. Tonight (I mean last night) I was watching a new DVD about Disneyland. It’s all these programs that were aired about the park, from 1955 to 1970. So far, I’ve only watched the first show, from 1955, which was broadcast live from opening day. It’s quite charming to travel back in time and see what was then so unique. I went that very month, and it was an incredible treat to walk down Main Street (I went to the silent movie theater, and they had one other movie theater where they were showing something in 3D). I loved Frontierland and Fantasyland, thought Adventureland was okay, but my favorite was Tomorrowland, because one could see what the year 1986 was going to be like. Apparently, moon travel was going to be the norm in 1986. Not the pete, mind you, no it was going to be the norm. Why norm got singled out is anyone’s guess. This new DVD comes in a special tin holder and it is a numbered limited edition. Best of all, Fess Parker sings a song about Davy Crockett’s rifle, Betsy, and he’s joined by his co-star Buddy Ebsen (Mr. Barnaby Jones himself). Most amusingly, host Art Linkletter brags that there’s space for 12,000 cars, and that they’re building four motor hotels nearby. I once came up with what I called the Disney theory of relationships. Would you like to hear it? Good. When you start out and first meet it’s Frontierland. Then, as you get to know each other and click and begin to explore, it’s Adventureland. Then, everything is rainbows and excitement and fun and fancy free, you’re in Fantasyland. Then, as you fall in love and get giddy and begin to make plans, it’s Tomorrowland. There, isn’t that a good Disney theory of relationships? Of course, if you have a stormy relationship, it’s Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.
I don’t know, it just doesn’t seem like it’s Monday. I’ve still got a Sunday vibe going. Yes, this vibe is definitely Sudayville. That reminds of my percussion theory of relationships. When you first meet, you get a good vibe. Then, bells start to ring. Then, you give your intended a ring as a cymbal of your affection and love. You treat each other with soft mallets and you occasionally chime in with the love talk. Then, drum roll, you pop the question. I do believe I’ve had it with these theories for today.
Well, dear readers, I am quite tired and must get some sleep on this night before the following day. I must hit the road to dreamland and when I awaken it will be Monday, even though it is already Monday because these are Monday’s notes. Yes, it’s that damn time/space continuum. Well, I will continuum these notes on the actual day known as Tuesday.