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March 7, 2002:

QUESTION ME AN ANSWER

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, I am pooped. I worked on our handy-dandy Nudie Musical documentary until 12:30 am. By the time I got home it was 1:00 am, and by the time I got to sleep it was 2:00 am. By the time I got to Phoenix she was rising. She probably found the note I left hangin’ by the door. And the note said, “I am pooped”. What the hell am I talking about? Well, this is what happens when you are pooped. You don’t think straight. You think crooked, and that is know way to think when you are trying to write these here notes. Of course, “you” aren’t trying to write these here notes, I am trying to write these here notes, so why did I say “you” when I meant me? I’ll tell you why – because I am pooped. Well, now, I think we’ve exhausted the subject of being pooped, don’t you, dear readers?

Yesterday, I worked with the lovely Michelle Nicastro, who is singing a demo of songs from my new musical (written with David Wechter). First of all, Michelle looks lovelier than ever. And hearing her sing these songs was a total treat. We’ll be doing the demo early next week.

I picked up a few new CDs, most notably the new Dreamgirls concert CD and DRG’s reissue of the cast album of The Nervous Set. I’ll listen to them very soon and have a full report for you. I also picked up the new release of an older soundtrack, Mr. Bruce Broughton’s The Boy Who Could Fly. First off, I’m very fond of that film and I do believe they should put it on DVD right this very minute before I have a hissy fit. Of course, there is nothing worse than a loose and ill-fitting hissy, so I don’t really see what’s so wrong with having a hissy fit. I think The Boy Who Could Fly (with the exception of one scene that actually does considerable damage to an otherwise wonderful film) is a feel-good film with excellent performances, especially the young girl, Lucy Deakins, who is terrific. I think she did this film and maybe one or two others and then disappeared. Where has she been? Anyway, Mr. Broughton’s score is a wonder – gorgeous melodies – soaring, tender, and luscious. There is an extremely rare Varese Sarabande soundtrack CD, but it was a rerecording and very short. That situation has now been rectified by Percepto Records who presents the original soundtrack complete, for the first time. I truly recommend The Boy Who Could Fly if you’re a fan of orchestral soundtracks.

What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? We’ve got questions to answer. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, every Wednesday (starting yesterday) is Ask Bruce day, where you can ask me any questions your little hearts desire and I will answer them the following day. The first question, of course, is “Do I have to click on the Unseemly Button below to see the answers to the questions”? And the answer is, “Yes”.

Have I mentioned that I am pooped? Well, I am. Shortly I will be going to my very own hairdresser, Teddy, who will dress my very own hair which, frankly, is tired of being undressed. Teddy will do my ‘do, as it were. He will make me look presentable and then I can not only admire my feet and my fingernails, I can admire my hair, too. Isn’t that exciting? I always go to Teddy in March, because there is nothing better than a March Hair. I will have a full report on my new and improved ‘do tomorrow, when I will hopefully not be as pooped as I am today. In any case, on to your questions and on to my answers.

Dear reader Laura asks why are cows referred to as “neat” animals? In Laura’s very own dictionary, the first definition of “neat” is: Pertaining to bovine animals.

Well, this is a fine question and an important one, as I feel we all take cows for granted. Cows are referred to as “neat” because they are extremely tidy. They are very anal about their tidiness. Have you ever seen a cow’s home? There is not one thing out of place, there is no dust anywhere, and everything is spic and span, not necessarily in that order. Camels, on the other hand, are total slobs, live in hovels, don’t do the dishes. In fact, camels are pigs (no mean feat). No, cows are amongst the neatest of all animal species and I, for one, am grateful. The only complaint I have against a cow is their limited vocabulary. Whatever the topic of discussion is, all they say is “Moo”. This gets very tiresome after awhile. Oh, they say “Moo” very neatly, because that is in their nature, but it would be nice to vary the language every now and then.

Arnold M. Brockman asks if it bothers the creators of CDs today that the user can randomly play whatever tracks they want to… in order, out of order, unlike the old LP days, where you tended to play the LP in the order that the artist/producer wanted you to hear it in.

That is an interesting question. I can’t speak for others, but it certainly bothers me. It bothers me because I spend a very long time trying to get the sequencing right. Sometimes I get lucky and get it right right away, and sometimes it takes weeks. I feel if you don’t have the right sequencing that it hurts the repeatability of an album. I also feel that albums are listening experiences – the idea being that it’s not just a bunch of songs thrown together, but a journey of some sort. Early on, I came up with a theory about sequencing, and that theory never failed me in any of the 130 albums I’ve done so far. Again, some albums are easier than others, but ultimately my theory tends to make for satisfying listening experiences. Of course, for concept albums like Christianne Noll’s A Broadway Love Story, it is imperative that it’s listened to from start to finish, because it tells a linear story. I have bought too many albums where the sequencing is not well thought out, and those tend to be albums I never play after one listening, even though the album might be decent. But, no matter what, good or bad, one should always have a first-time listen in the order the creators of the CD intend.

Lolita askes what do I think of David Mamet?

I don’t think of Mr. Mamet that often, but when I do I tend to like him. He has a distinctive voice, which I always admire in artists. I don’t always respond to his material, but he’s always interesting. I like Glengarry Glen Ross, and I’m quite fond of his first film, House of Games. His dialogue, once you get used to its style and rhythm, is fun in an outre sort of way.

William F. Orr asks if I can tell you dear readers more about the musical I am in the midst of writing, or if it is shrouded in mystery.

It is, for the moment, shrouded in mystery, like the Shroud of Turin. Is that right? “Turin”? Is that spelled right? Or is it the Shroud of Judge Turpin”? In any case, I tend to keep a tight lid on new projects, because I’ve had ideas ripped off in the past. But, in the next few weeks, when it’s a bit further along, you dear readers will be the first to know the details. I will say it’s a comedy musical with an emphasis on humor. I will say that the basic “idea” behind the show has been tried before, but never with success. I will also say that it’s origins are in an unproduced film script of mine which I wrote back in 1993, although this brand spanking new musical has ended up quite differently.

Mattso asks if there is any chance I’ll be bringing back my musical Stages in any form.

Frankly, I would like to bring it back in the form of the Shroud of Turin or Turpin or whatever the hell it is. No, I haven’t any plans to do so. When the show was originally done, it had quite a few stock and amateur productions, but it was a different world back then, and it was very hard to place new musicals with Samuel French and places like MTI. Today I would have that deal in a thrice. I simply got tired of dealing with all the requests personally. That said, it was a fun show, well-reviewed at the time and audiences really seemed to enjoy it. We originally tried it out at my alma mater, LACC. Then we moved it to the Matrix Theater is West Hollywood, where it had a very successful sold-out run.
Mattso also asks if there’s any chance of rereleasing the CD, The Music of Bruce Kimmel, which contains songs from that and other shows I’ve written, including the soundtrack to Nudie Musical. Again, I haven’t any plans, although at some point I may gather some of my favorite singers together to do an album of my songs. The Nudie soundtrack will, of course, be included in the Special Edition DVD.

JMK asks if I have my own favorite out of the many albums I’ve produced?

That is a hard question, and one I’m never able to really answer in any meaningful way. I do have favorites, though, and some of them include Prime Time Musicals, Unsung Irving Berlin, Unsung Sondheim (not so wonderful technically, but it was the first and I’m partial to it), The Burt Bacharach Album. Of the singers, I’d say that Christianne Noll’s A Broadway Love Story is as good as I get – an album where I was able to take a concept I had and fully realize it, and realize it with a singer perfectly in tune with both concept and songs. That was a very hard album to put together and get right, but the result is pretty damn good. I also like the two albums with Emily and Alice, and the three Liz Callaway albums. Not to slight any of the other wonderful singers I’ve worked with, but those are the ones that come immediately to mind. Of the cast albums, I suppose I’m partial to The King and I and Bells Are Ringing. Of the off-Broadway albums, I’m very partial to Radio Gals and No Way To Treat A Lady. But, they’re all my babies and there are only a small handful that I think don’t please me in any way.

Well, that was fun, wasn’t it? At least for me. I’m going to enjoy the Ask Bruce Wednesdays and I hope you will, too. Oh, my goodness, where has the time all gone to? I must hurry now and prepare to go to Teddy. Teddy is very insistent that people be punctual. Teddy has a hissy fit if a client is late. After getting my new ‘do, I will be going out to Image Entertainment to put the final touches on the documentary, so it’s going to be another late night. But I’ll be back tomorrow with more of these here notes. And for the many people who were searching, searching, searching (that is three searchings) yesterday, I do so hope you found what you were looking for.

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