Well, dear readers, I survived another endless day. The piece we’ve been working on is just about finished, and I’ve already started viewing the tapes for the next bit. The weather here in Los Angeles, California has turned chilly (at least in the evenings), chilly enough that I had to turn on the heat last night. I love turning on the heat, don’t you, dear readers. And the heat appreciates being turned on, too. But why doesn’t the heat reciprocate? Why, for example, doesn’t the heat turn me on? I mean, here I turn the heat on and the heat just sits there like so much fish leaving me in the off position. What the hell am I talking about?
In any case, here I am bright and early, trying to get these here notes done before I have to be on my merry way. I can’t even think of anything to write about, frankly. But do I want to write about anything frankly – perhaps I’d rather be a bit oblique and obtuse or even obtuse and oblique. I ean, my brain is already fried and it’s only Tuesday. Has anyone noticed that I typed “I ean”? What does that ean? “I ean”. What happened to the fershluganah “m”? This is what happens when one tries to type at seven in the morning after having just gotten up. One occasionally misses a letter and writes “I ean”. However, I shall do my best not to mistype anything else for the duration of these here notes.
Has anyone noticed that today is October 1st? I have – but just barely and only because I looked at the date thingee on my computer. So, happy October everyone. Sadly, September was a bit slow here at haineshisway.com, stats-wise. Part of that problem was the stats thing screwed up three of our busiest days and didn’t count them, but even if it had it would have been our slowest month since March. Now, we simply cannot have that, so we must now make October our best month ever. We must rally ’round the flag, boys and girls, and we must do, do, do (that is three dos) what we must and we must do it well. Our path is clear and our head’s our high. I woke up with a bit of a sore throat today and we cannot have that either – it just came totally out of nowhere. I am now popping zinc mercilessly because I shan’t be sick when I come to New York.
Today I shall be lunching with my pal, Penny Peyser, who I’ve asked to help cast the upcoming film we’ll be doing. We shall be lunching at a lovely coffee shop, Cable’s. Today’s notes are starting to feel like a laundry list – I’m doing this, then I’m doing that, then I’m doing this, then I’m doing that. How boring. What we need is a pick-me-up. I ean, we just can’t keep going along being all boring and making people yawn, now can we?
I feel this new paragraph will be filled with razz-ma-tazz and all that jazz – oh, a Kander and Ebb reference. I feel this new paragraph will be as perky as a pickled herring in sour cream. I feel this paragraph will be stylin’ and happening. I feel this paragraph will be sweet. In short, I feel this paragraph will kick butt cheeks.
There, that’s what we needed, a pick-me-up. Now that we’ve had it, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below so we can continue to find new ways to be dazzlingly deft and delightful.
I already feel that this section is dazzlingly deft and delightful and I haven’t even finished this sentence yet. It’s all in the attitude, that’s what I say. I ean, if you’ve got the attitude then you can’t help but be dazzlingly deft and delightful. My eyes feel very tired and are quite red right now. I feel logey and I need to get energized so I can view more tapes without nodding off completely. Speaking of work, I do think that I got my pal Jason Graae a little acting gig on this show (pending his availability, as we don’t know exactly when it would shoot). Isn’t that exciting? Isn’t that just too too?
I had nothing further to write, so I went away for a few minutes and am now back. However, I still have nothing further to write. How can I be dazzlingly deft and delightful if I am out of things to write? Tomorrow I shall have things to write. Of course, I’d write more if you’d all post more. With the exception of a few days last week (especially Friday, when it was like old times around here) things have been pretty sparse, post-wise. I ean, how can we be the most popular site on all the Internet with all this errant and truant behavior. If this continues, then I shall have to be errant and truant and then we will have chaos and disorder and then where will we be? We must all pull our weight here at haineshisway.com. Of course, since I haven’t been able to do a spot of exercise in three weeks, I have plenty of weight to pull. Let us all post until the cows come home and be dazzlingly deft and delightful.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must put on clothing and get in my automobile and drive west to Woodland Hills. And when I get there I would like to log on to the computer and see posts. That is my fervent prayer because let’s face it love is a many splendored thing. Today’s topic of discussion: What are your favorite dazzlingly deft and delightfully dizzy film comedies? I’ll start – The Lady Eve, Sullivan’s Travels, Some Like it Hot, Bringing up Baby, Bachelor Flat (quite dated and silly, but I’ve always loved Frank Tashlin and I’ve always had a special place in my heart for this film and its wonderful cast of Terry-Thomas, Richard Beymer and Tuesday Weld – plus it has one of the earliest (maybe the first) film score written by John(ny) Williams), To Be or Not To Be (the Lubitsch version), The Major and the Minor (very underrated Wilder), and many others. Your turn. And, as always, talk about whatever comes to mind. We must be diverse. We must be happy posters. We must have discourse and declamations. We must be droll and daffy and ducky. Go to it. Thus I say and say no more.