Well, dear readers, tra la, tra la, it’s the lusty month of May. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, tra la, tra la, it’s the lusty month of May. I feel so damnably lusty, do you? I feel so damnably lusty that I might just tell the story of The Randy Vicar and the Crack of Dawn. Oh, that is a lusty tale. May – a time of nymphs and satyrs and sprites, or at the very least mountain dews. May – a month in which you may, whatever you so choose. May – a time for merriment and mirth and laughter and legs. What the hell am I talking about?
Last night I watched the American version of the Japanese film Ringu, which was rather creatively entitled The Ring. The first half of the film followed the Japanese quite closely, even shot for shot at times. Then they do the American thing and try to add plot elements and explain things to the nth degree and the whole thing just dissolves in a puddle. The director also blows the Japanese film’s biggest scare by shooting it so that the effect is telegraphed before it happens (I won’t spoil it here). But I do like Miss Naomi Watts very much and the DVD was free, so there you are. Also, Hans Zimmer, a composer I simply don’t care for, wrote a nice score for it. I also watched Ken Russell’s marvelous BBC biography called Elgar.
Today I shall be having another work session with Mr. Grant Geissman, for our upcoming album project. We shall work, and then I shall go off and do other things which need doing and I shall do them lustily because, after all, it is tra la, tra la, the lusty month of May.
Now, here is my question: How come people name their children after months of the year – such as May, April, June, August, and yet they never name their children February or September or November. Damn them, damn them all to hell. Let’s click on the Unseemly Button below because don’t I have excellent questions to answer? I do, and I shall.
Has anyone noticed that it’s tra la, tra la, the lusty month of May? I feel giddy with lustiness, my cheeks are ruddy with lust, my lust is ruddy with cheeks and so forth and so on and also so on and so forth. To the questions, say I.
JMK asks which specific songs did Bob Merrill and Strouse and Adams write for Hello, Dolly! Well, I know that Merrill wrote some of Motherhood, all of Elegance. As far as I know, Strouse and Adams didn’t write anything – but they did, if I remember correctly, come up with the title Before the Parade Passes By. I can’t remember the name of the song Sondheim wrote for the Judy Holliday flop, but it’s well documented. Also don’t know which he wrote for Ilya Darling.
Lulu asks if I remember any specific instances of my darling daughter being excessively cute and/or precocious and/or silly as a youngster. Of course I do, but I’m not sure that darling daughter would like me to speak of them. My favorite darling daughter story, which I’ve told many times, is this: At the time Nudie Musical came out, I was going to the Van Nuys Newsstand every day to get out of town papers where the film was playing. They have a big awning which runs the length of the newsstand, and on the awning it even says “Out of Town Papers”. So, one day, I go to the newsstand with darling daughter in tow. I park in front of the stand, tell her to wait for a second and that I’ll be right back. I get whatever papers I needed and come back to the car. She says, “Daddy, I hope you didn’t want any town papers.” I said, “Why?” She said, “Because they’re out of them.” It took me a minute, then I realized what she meant and I think I laughed for three days straight. Next story: When I was separated from my now ex-wife back in 1974, my darling daughter stayed with me every weekend. One day we decided we wanted pancakes for breakfast and she said she wanted to cook them. I didn’t know from pancakes and neither did she – but we went to the store and bought the ingredients. She whipped up the batter, then got out the Crisco. She didn’t really know what the Crisco was for so she just dumped a bunch into the batter. Needless to say, the pancakes were somewhat lumpen with foul tasting Crisco and we laughed about that for days, too. She also had a habit of coming into the den (when I’d gotten back together with my ex) totally naked and she’d shake her booty and run out of the room laughing. We also used to hide under her covers from her mother, although I can’t remember why. As she’s already said, we used to dance up a storm and I’d teach her the choreography (as best I knew how) to various musical numbers and we’d do them over and over again. Well, those are a few anyway.
Jrand52 asks if I collect autographs. I’ve never been one to collect autographs per se, although I have many signed books. I do have about 200 pieces of correspondence with my close personal friend, Mr. Stephen Sondheim, and lots of notes and letters from Mr. Harvey Schmidt. I have notes from most of the composers/lyricists I’ve worked with.
Arnold M. Brockman asks why the word “trailer” for coming attractions. I’m not really sure since coming attractions usually precede the film, not follow it. In City of Angels Stine, the author, sings a duet with his fictional creation Stone. In Woman of the Year Sam sings a duet with his cartoon alter-ego Katz. Can I think of any other instances where the author sings a duet with his own creation? No.
Kurt asks what new musicals do I think would attract audiences at his local theater. Many dear readers have posted excellent answers. I’d offer the musical that David Wechter and I are in the midst of – it’s quite amusing and quite tuneful and unfortunately quite unfinished. I also like No Way to Treat a Lady and The Gig by Doug Cohen.
Ron Pulliam asks how I feel about being specific. I feel very specific about being specific is the fact of the matter. What is my opinion of the film 1776 on LD and DVD and what is my take on contradictions between Peter Hunt’s comments on the LD and his comments on the DVD? I had problems with 1776 on the LD, but was grateful to see the cut material. I was not grateful for LD producer Joe Capporiccio’s meddling – adding overtures that were never there, shots that were never in the film, etc. I think Mr. Hunt was guided in his commentary by Joe, and I think that he was happy to have the cut material available. I also think that afterwards he regretted some of it, and he fixed those things for the DVD. As a film, I find 1776 ponderous, but enjoyable. It’s quite badly directed, I think, but it does preserve the marvelous cast and script and score.
William E. Lurie says that according to the Leonard Maltin annual film guide I wrote most of the songs for The First Nudie Musical. Mr. Lurie thought I wrote all of them (save for Diana Canova’s La Cucaracha). Is Maltin correct? Is Maltin ever correct? It’s not too hard to research that information. I did, in fact, write every note of music and every lyric in the film, including So Touch Me, I’m You, and the nude buck and wing song. Now, go bitch-slap Mr. Leonard Maltin from here to eternity.
Sandra has another paper to write for her literature and film class. She has to read a book and see the movie based on it and write a paper about symbolism and all that. I once wrote a paper on Symbolism and All That, it was quite amusing. Her choices are: Any Shakespeare play except Hamlet. The Maltese Falcon. Any Hemingway novel/short story and its film counterpart. Schindler’s List. The English Patient. Any Ian Fleming novel. The African Queen. I choose Hamlet, naturally. I’d recommend Hemingway’s The Killers/Robert Siodmak’s film of same. Or, I suppose, The Maltese Falcon.
Jose asks if there’s any show currently in NYC that I would really like to see but probably won’t get the chance to. No, I intend getting the chance to see whatever I want to see. I definitely want to see Long Day’s Journey Into Night, Hairspray and Gypsy, and by gum and by golly I shall, on my next trip in.
JB aka JK asks if I will do her the honor of being her date at the showing of Nudie Musical. Of course, I couldn’t think of anyone better to be my date. JB aka JK was also my date at the Grammys, the year I was nominated.
Matthew asks if I’ve heard any of the works of Bernard J. Taylor and if so, what do I think of them. I have several of them (I think he sent them to me back in the Varese days) and I know I listened to one or two, but I have absolutely no memory of how they sounded or what they were like, hence I have no answer to this question. What do I think of Xanadu as a possible stage musical? Not much. It’s a small cult film, which has its charms, but it would absolutely die on stage.
MattH asks if I saw Barbara Cook’s Mostly Sondheim solo show. No, I’m sorry to say I didn’t. Have I ever seen Ms. Cook in any of her stage roles? Nope.
Tom from Oz asks for comments on Peter Sellers as an actor – favorite performances, etc. I though Sellers was superb, and he’s always been a favorite, from his early Goon Show days, and his early Brit films, right through to Being There. My faves are his Quilty in Lolita, his bravura turn in Dr. Strangelove, his similar bravura turn in The Mouse that Roared, What’s New, Pussycat, and the original Pink Panther film. He’s also hilarious in the less-than-hilarious The Party.
Td asks the following: Where was I when Kennedy was shot? In high school at recess. We were all sent home. Have I ever been to Nashville? Nope. Do I have any favorite Robert Altman films? I’m not a huge Altman fan, but I sort of tolerate MASH, Gosford Park and Nashville. Popeye or HEALTH – which do I like more? Well, I hate them both, but Popeye is more tolerable. HEALTH I walked out of after forty minutes. What are my personal feelings about Nashville? Oh, I like it fine, but I don’t find it the masterpiece everyone else does. Who, in my personal opinion (as opposed to someone else’s personal opinion) was responsible for JFK’s assassination? Well, I’m of the opinion that more than one person is responsible – who they were would be speculation and I don’t like to speculate, especially on a street corner on a hot day. Oliver Stone, according to Td, is an “iffy” director. What are my feelings about his film JFK? I hate just about all of Mr. Stone’s output with the exception of JFK, which I find riveting. Finally, if only the actresses from Nashville had been nominated for Oscars, which one should have won? Lily Tomlin, Barbara Baxley, Ronnee Blakely, Barbara Harris or Geraldine Chaplin? Either one of the Barbaras would have been fine by me.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must drive to Mr. Grant Geissman’s house and work, work, work (that is three works), and then I must eat foodstuffs and write and whatnot. Today’s topic of discussion: We may have done this one before, but let’s do it again – who were your movie star or theater crushes when you were growing up? I’ll start – those who have read Benjamin Kritzer know who my first was – after that, I had a crush on Miss Susan Gordon, Hayley Mills, and Miss Tuesday Weld. Your turn, and post with gusto and lusto because, after all, it is tra la, tra la, the lusty month of May.