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August 2, 2003:

THE INTERNAL CLOCK

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, you won’t believe it – I can barely believe it myself and yet it is true. Today, Saturday, I had every intention of sleeping in, oh, yes, I had every intention of sleeping in. After all, there was nothing precluding me from sleeping in, no cleaning lady with the Evil Eye, no work, no breakfast meetings, no nothing. And yet, here I am, at seven o’clock in the morning, writing these here notes. That is because my internal clock woke me up. My internal clock is apparently now set for this time of the morning, and the infernal internal clock’s alarm goes off and I wake up even though I am supposed to be sleeping in. This is known as The Internal Clock Doesn’t Know How To Differentiate Between the Weekdays and the Weekends Syndrome, and it is well-documented in the book The Internal Clock Doesn’t Always Know From Weekdays and Weekends by Dr. Heinrich J. Shnitzenfrauderbien, the preeminent authority on internal clocks. Does anyone have a clew as to what the hell I’m going on about?

Tonight I shall be seeing Mr. Jason Graae in concert at the John Anson Ford Theater, with our very own dear readers Sandra and Laura, not necessarily in that order. First we will dine but I haven’t decided on a restaurant yet. Today I shall be picking up some brand spanking new DVD releases for next week – I warn you now it’s a rather incredible week for DVD releases. I will be getting The Thing (from Another World), The Omega Man, Soylent Green, Wait Until Dark and one or two others. Isn’t that exciting? Isn’t that just too too? Today I will also be writing, although somehow I did not fall behind this week, so that’s good.

Last night I watched a motion picture entitled The Secret Beyond the Door, un film de Fritz Lang. I love the films of Mr. Lang, and I love this film’s star, Joan Bennett (with whom Mr. Lang made my favorite, The Woman in the Window) – however, this film is really bad, truly bad. Still, Mr. Lang’s direction is always good, and Miss Bennett tries her best, but the script is a hopeless muddle, an inept Spellbound wannabe, right down to its Miklos Rozsa score.

Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below, because I must read Mr. Heinrich J. Shnitzenfrauderbien’s second book, The Sexual Urge in Those Who Eat Rye Bread.

Has anyone noticed that we’ve had three count them three straight days of over one hundred posts? And, on one of those days, we had over two hundred posts. I’d say that was a record of some sort, wouldn’t you? I feel that soon we will be the most popular site on all the Internet.

Have I mentioned that I’ll be seeing our very own Mr. Jason Graae this evening? Has anyone noticed that I am repeating myself ad nauseum? Has anyone noticed that I am repeating myself ad nauseum? This, of course, has to do with my fershluganah internal clock being mucked up.

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must go hither and thither and yon, I must do errands and banking and also banking and errands and I must do other things such as shower and shave and also read Dr. Heinrich J. Shnitzenfrauderbien’s scholarly tome, The Reasons for Lint. Today’s topic of discussion: What are your all-time favorite driving songs – you know, those songs that you love to play while tooling along the motorways. For example, I always like the Beach Boys for driving, and also other classic rock-and-roll from the fifties and early sixties. I also like to drive at night whilst listening to pretty soundtrack music. Your turn, and post often, and since it’s a casual Saturday, let’s have a clothing call as well.

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