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November 1, 2004:

I HEREBY DECREE

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, welcome to the Wonderfully Wonderful World of November. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, it is November, as we hurtle towards December and the New Year. We shall have a wonderfully wonderful November – we shall celebrate birthdays and Thanksgiving and whatnot, and there will be surprises galore. November will be the berries, dear readers. Of course, October went out in style with a splendidly splendid Halloween bash right here at haineshisway.com. We had tricks, we had treats, we had a miniscule number of photos, but we still had a marvelously marvelous time. I had a record number of trick or treaters here in the new home environment – about quadruple the number that I had in the old home environment. I gave away many bags of candies, including such favorites as Skittles, Mike and Ike’s, Baby Ruth, Baby June, Baby Jane, Mounds Bars, Almond Joy, M&M Peanut and Three Musketeers. The whole neighborhood was festively festive with Halloween décor. Yesterday was also a spectacularly spectacular day with blue skies and a gentle breeze. I took a swim and took a walk and I even wrote a few pages. But enough of October, it’s November I’m talkin’ about. November will bring the birth of our new Writer’s Block website, which hopefully will be up in a week or two, so that you can order your very own signed copies. I will have more news about that coming very soon. Isn’t that exciting? Isn’t that just too too?

Yesterday, I caught up with a motion picture which you dear readers recommended strongly, the musical comedy entitled Love Me Tonight, directed by Mr. Rouben Mamoulian, and starring Mr. Maurice Chevalier and Miss Jeanette MacDonald, along with Mr. Charles Ruggles and an impossibly young and cute Miss Myrna Loy. It was quite delightful and full of directorial invention. And the score by Rodgers and Hart was amazing – Lover, Isn’t it Romantic, and my favorite, Mimi. The transfer was pretty terrific, too. I then watched Broadway’s Lost Treasures II. I must say that both volumes annoy me in one way or another. There is just no thought to the presentation as I see it. They just group the numbers into these lame sections and there’s no build or fun to it. And the awful introductory sections are just horridly written. The clips are the thing and I’m here to tell you that there are great programs to be made, these just aren’t it. That said, the second volume is worth the entire price just for the We’ll Take a Glass Together number from Grand Hotel. I watched it five times in a row. Watching many of the other numbers I marveled at how wonderful a choreographer Mr. Tommy Tune is. And doesn’t our very own Brent Barrett look splendidly splendid. The endless Coco segment is fun – the most astonishing thing for me, having seen it in 1969 (the Tony broadcast, that is), is that back then I thought Hepburn looked ancient – I thought she was ancient. Of course, she was merely in her mid-fifties and viewing the segment now she looks really good. Time, you devil you. The best part of the entire Coco segment is watching the models parade around in Mr. Michael Bennett’s fascinating patterns. The lowest point of the viewing experience is, of course, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. What a wretched thing to watch. However, it was fun seeing the very young Bill Hutton, and it was more than fun seeing the very young and beautiful and vivacious Miss Laurie Beechman. I shed a tear I must admit, in remembrance of our very special time together, our very special relationship, and the very special albums we made.

Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because it is November and we must make every minute of this marvelously marvelous month count.

Have I mentioned that it is the wonderfully wonderful month of November? I hereby decree that no one shall eat head cheese in the month of November. I hereby decree that we shall all dance about like beavers doing the Hustle. I hereby decree that we shall sing obscure show tunes like Glenda’s Place from Whoop Up, and All We Need is a Hammer from Passion Flower Hotel. I hereby decree we shall make egg salad and we shall hurl it at people we don’t care for. We shall be known far and wide and also wide and far as The Egg Salad Hurlers of haineshisway.com. I hereby decree that if anyone has a clew as to what the hell I’m talking about, that they hurl it to the four winds. Or is it the seven winds? Or is it the seven seas? Or is it the four seas? Well, it’s the four of something and the seven of something which, of course, adds up to the eleven winds and seas.

Well, I feel we’re off to a fine start in this wonderfully wonderful month of November. I, for example, cannot wait to hurl some egg salad at some people I don’t care for. The question is, will I be able to hurl it that far? I hereby decree I shall be able to hurl it that far, as far as a po’ boy will carry it, if you get my drift.

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must write, I must do an errand or two, I must return some phone calls, and then tonight I must attempt to go to the editors house to give him my notes on the What If video. Today’s topic of discussion: What are your favorite performances of Miss Katherine Hepburn? My favorite of hers is in Long Day’s Journey Into Night, in which she’s just brilliant. I also like her in Bringing Up Baby and Desk Set quite a bit. I leave the others to you. I hereby decree that we shall have loads of lovely postings, as we welcome in the wonderfully wonderful month of November.

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