Well, dear readers, I am starting these here notes quite late, so I must hurry and mustn’t dawdle, Amaryllis. So, I shall just dive right in and there will be no fat in these here notes – just the meat, baby. These here notes will be a lean machine. Lean notes – that is today’s dictum and we must not forget it, for it is unseemly to forget one’s dictum. Speaking of lean machines, yesterday I got quite a few interesting things done early on, then met with Mr. Kevin Spirtas to do some work, then did some errands. I then attended a concert version of Noel Coward’s Sail Away with Miss Barbara Deutsch. I mean, I attended with Miss Deutsch, not that Miss Deutsch was in Sail Away. I saw many people I knew in the audience, and spoke to quite a few of them about quite a few interesting things. And then there was Sail Away. The MTG concert readings are not as elaborate as Encores! or Reprise – they are much lower budgeted and minimalist. I wish I could say that Sail Away was a misunderstood flop that should have been a hit, but it’s very clear why the show tanked, despite Mr. Coward and Miss Elaine Stritch. One can hear Miss Stritch delivering the more caustic of the lines, and I imagine she brought some true star power to the show, and I imagine she got some hefty laughs. But, the plot is so wafer thin, with no real drama or momentum – things just sort of happen, and then we get lots of scenes with the supporting characters, and we just don’t care about anyone. The score does boast one great song, the title song – one of Coward’s most sublime melodies. There are two or three other numbers that are decent, but other than that, the show is almost a complete washout from start to finish. Last night’s cast did a nice job, and the staging, while simple, moved things right along. The audience was very appreciative. Strangely, in the audience were many musical directors I’ve worked with, including Gerald Sternbach, Steven Smith, and Steve Orich. Afterwards, Miss Deutsch and I went to a strange little all-night coffee shop, where I had strange fish and chips and she had an omelet. And that is the lean and mean version of yesterday’s eventful events.
Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because I have no time for fat – we are a lean machine, notes-wise, and we must not dawdle, Amaryllis. No fat – that is today’s dictum.
Over the last couple of days I have been trying to watch a motion picture on DVD entitled Spaceballs, directed by Mr. Mel Brooks. I’ve always thought this was one of the worst comedies ever made. It even made my The Creature Wasn’t Nice look good. But, there is a new special edition DVD out, so I thought maybe it had aged well and that now, given the dearth of comedies, it might actually be funny. It’s excruciating. One interesting thing – this is one of the deadest-sounding films I’ve ever heard. There is no presence in any of the scenes – it sounded like they just used the production sound and didn’t add room tone or any other kind of ambience. It’s not that there aren’t funny things in Spaceballs, it’s that you can predict them miles before they happen, and then, once they happen they’re done and you’re left with interminable scenes. Darth Helmut is a funny name – once. The Druish Princess is funny once. Pizza the Hut is funny once. John Candy has been given not one funny line or bit of business in the entire film. John Morris’ score has its moments, but, for me, it’s the ugliest and cheapest-looking of any Brooks film.
What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? Have I forgotten my dictum about lean and mean notes? Have you ever forgotten your dictum? Most embarrassing, I can assure you.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must do errands, I must do some work on this here laptop computer, I must pick up packages, and I must do other assorted things throughout the livelong day and night. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s wrong casting day here at haineshisway.com. So, let’s have the wrongest possible casting for the haineshisway.com revival of Hello, Dolly! Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, and let us be sure not to forget our collective dictums.