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January 31, 2006:

THE WEIRDLY PLACED “R

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, here we are on the final day of January. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, here we are on the final day of January. To put it another way, there will be no more days in January after this day. In other words, forget about January after today because after today it will be February. I like February because of the weirdly placed “r” in the middle of it. Just what IS that weirdly placed “r” doing in there anyway? For example, why isn’t there a weirdly placed “r” in January? If it’s February then why isn’t it Janruary? These are the questions that roam around the windmills of my mind. Speaking of the windmills of my mind, yesterday was a peculiar day in which not much happened. Oh, I wrote a few pages, I booked my editing sessions, and I did a few errands, but that was about it. Our very own Mr. Nick Redman came by in the afternoon, and we toddled off to the Wood of Holly to sup at Musso and Frank before attending the screening of South Pacific. Sadly, I’d forgotten that Musso and Frank is now closed on Mondays. So, we went to Miceli’s instead, and had an excellent Eyetalian meal. After our excellent Eyetalian meal, we walked over to an ice cream place and we both got a small vanilla custard cone, which we ate as we walked to the theater. Now, I haven’t been to the Pacific’s since they closed in the early 90s. In fact, I think the last film I saw there was Carrie, in the mid-70s. The Pacific’s was originally built in 1926, and was one of the most ornate and gorgeous theaters in Hollywood. In the early 50s it became the Warner Cinerama, and that is where all Cinerama productions played, up thought How The West Was Won. After that, Pacific’s took it over, removed the Cinerama screen and projection booths, but the theater remained the gorgeous palace that it was. I saw many films there, including Flower Drum Song, The Counterfeit Traitor, Thoroughly Modern Millie, 2001, A Clockwork Orange, and many others. In the late 70s they did something reprehensible – they closed off the balcony and made two mini-theaters up there, and it was hideous. But, the downstairs remained the same gorgeous space as always.

The theater closed in the early 90s. I had no idea if it had fallen into complete disrepair, but I knew that they occasionally held parties and screenings there. In 2000, the facility was taken over by a digital projection group from USC, and today it is used mostly for digital screenings. Walking into the lobby was like going back in a time machine. Even though it could use a good cleaning, the ornate walls and rugs are still there and in reasonably good condition. The inside of the theater has been kept up nicely – the seats are in good shape and it’s clean. The downstairs, where they have the restrooms, is the size of some Cineplex theaters – it, too, could use some paint and furniture, but you can see what it once was. The crime is that Warner Bros. is not the company that Disney is – if they were, they’d buy the theater, put a million into restoring it and making it state-of-the-art, and then make it a showcase house like Disney did with the El Capitan. In any case, I saw a few people I know, and then we took our seats. As we sat there, I pictured in my mind being in that theater when I saw Seven Wonders of the World in Cinerama (as described in detail in Benjamin Kritzer). Finally, it was time for the film to start.

What we were shown was a digitally projected version of South Pacific, the source being a D5, which contained the new restoration done for the upcoming DVD. This was the first time I’d ever seen digital projection, and from the first frame of the credits I was very impressed. No, it wasn’t like seeing the 70mm version, but it was like seeing a very good 35mm print. The fact is, they made a new 70mm print, and I’m really hoping they screen it somewhere in the near future. In any case, it’s a whole different experience watching South Pacific on the big screen. Things that are insufferable on a TV screen play much better on the big screen. It’s a much more compelling viewing experience, and the film seems better than it really is. And what the film really is is the lumbering thing it’s always been. It has no style, even though it’s beautifully photographed by Leon Shamroy. It just lumbers from one scene to the next, from one song to the next, with no cinematic style at all. The controversial color filters aren’t all that bad on the big screen, although they do become tiresome after a while. But, for me the big problem with the film I can sum up in two words: Mitzi Gaynor. I just don’t cotton to her as an actress, and she’s just grating, not charming, and sexless as Nellie Forbush. Still, the film has its pleasures, and the presentation was really good – the new 5.1 track is great and the color is perfect and saturated, the way we like it. Afterwards, there was a Q&A, filled with technobabble of the highest order. But, we did find out about the Oklahoma debacle. Apparently, the elements are not nearly in as good a condition as South Pacific. On top of that, the large format elements were scanned at 2K rather than the 4K scanning of South Pacific. Still, we were told that the master looks much better than the DVD, which, according to one of the speakers, was authored ineptly, with too much compression and image manipulation. He said if the same element was used for hi-def, no one would be complaining. I found that quite interesting. So, hopefully the authoring people will do right by South Pacific, and if they do they DVD should look brilliant. The newly-found fifteen minutes of footage couldn’t be included in our screening, as it wouldn’t fit on the D5 they were projecting from. The movie barely fit, and, in fact, they had to leave off the intermission slug and music. The DVD will include the footage as seamless branching – you can watch the film with or without the footage. All in all, it was a fun evening, and I was so glad to have been in that theater again.

Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because, after all, it is the last of January and we must ready ourselves for a month we like to call February.

Miss Linda Purl will be coming over at eleven and we’ll be taking all of the piano tracks we’ll be rehearsing to, which are all on cassette, and we’ll be transferring them to CD – that way, I can import them into my computer and put them in any order I like. That will probably take a couple of hours. Then, I’ll have to go out and do some errands, and then I’ll have to write, and then I’ll have to eat, and then I’ll have to sit on my couch like so much fish and perhaps even watch a DVD or two.

Just what IS that weirdly placed “r” doing in February? It just sits there like so much fish, doesn’t it? I mean, you don’t pronounce it, you don’t acknowledge it, and yet you have to put it in there when you write it out. Damn them, damn them all to hell.

Now wait just a darned minute. We’d all better put on our pointy party hats and our colored tights and pantaloons, we’d all better break out the cheese slices and the ham chunks, we’d all better dance the Hora or the Swim, because today is the actual birthday of dear reader Michael Shayne, Private Detective. So, let’s give a big haineshiway.com birthday cheer to our very own dear reader Michael Shayne, Private Detective. On the count of three: One, two, three – A BIG HAINESHISWAY.COM BIRTHDAY CHEER TO OUR VERY OWN DEAR READER MICHAEL SHAYNE, PRIVATE DETECTIVE!!!

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, ponder the weirdly placed “r” in February, I must write, I must do, I must go, I must, I must, I must (that is three I musts). Today’s topic of discussion: What is the best or most interesting thing you’ve ever found at a garage sale or swap meet or that you found on eBay? Not necessarily the most valuable, but the best and most interesting thing. Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we? We shall.

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