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May 20, 2006:

WE AIN’T DOWN YET

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, we ain’t down yet. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, we ain’t down yet, despite a yesterday in which it looked like everything was conspiring for us to be down. Yesterday was actually monumental in its awfulness. It was gargantuan in its awfulness. First we lost one of our leading players – strep throat the cause, and contagious (until Monday, conveniently after our show has played its two performances). I finally found another student to replace Mr. Strep Throat, and at that point we found out that one of the actors in the play that was supposed to open last night, broke their leg. That is normally a “good luck” sentiment, but apparently not for that fellow, who took it a little too literally. So, the performance was canceled and for a time it looked like we’d be able to actually rehearse in the space where we’re doing the show, as well as have our two actors who were also in that show be with us for both of our rehearsals. Then everything changed – it was decided to replace the injured actor, so all this weekend’s performances were chucked, but rehearsals were scheduled for both weekend days and we were asked to perform our show in a different space, as well as not have our two actors at all today, and only sporadically tomorrow (our first performance). Now, remember, we have yet to run our show straight through, and certain scenes haven’t even been run a second time since they were blocked. All I had was today and tomorrow to whip this thing into shape and now that time has become even more limited than what it was. The school attitude remains, “Oh, nobody is expecting anything, so it will be fine no matter what it is.” That’s not quite correct, though – I’m expecting something because I am a professional and I am a person who hates the amateur. So, not only do I have to put in a new actor, I have to deal with missing actors and a musical director who will be there a total of four hours for the entire weekend’s rehearsals. Of course, he’s never played the entire show through, and he hasn’t even played certain songs all the way through. For a short time, I thought about canceling our show, but that wouldn’t be fair to the handful of kids who’ve really put in a lot of effort and given it their all – there are an equal number of kids for whom the cancellation would be cause for cheering. I do hope the latter group doesn’t have any intention of actually attempting to have a career in show business. So, I agreed to the change of space, but even that didn’t earn me points – when I asked to have some actual lights for the mid-to-upstage area, I was told that was impossible, even though the instruments are there – just unplugged. I ain’t down on that front either, baby, and will be jumping down several people’s throats about it this morning. I mean, I’m the nice guy, I make it easy on everyone, and they can’t plug in a few lights? Puh-leeze. Well, we ain’t down yet – almost, but not quite.

Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because this story ain’t over yet.

So, this morning I’ll be on my way to LACC, after she of the Evil Eye arrives. Once there, I will fight the good fight and do everything I know how to do to get our little show ready for its staged reading. If any one of the usual suspects in my class throws any attitude my way, I will be merciless. An example of what I’m dealing with – we’re using scripts – the original plan was for everyone to be off book, but we’re using scripts. I have two actors who look at their script and STILL cannot say a line the way it’s written or sing a lyric the way it’s written. And when I correct them, which I do every single time, they look at me like I’m crazy. Apparently, they no longer teach respect for the written word. One of the aforementioned actors has had his song on tape for five weeks and he walked into rehearsal three days ago and when it came time to sing it he informed me he hadn’t learned it. Yesterday, when he was meandering around the stage and my assistant was telling him he wasn’t doing his blocking, I asked him if he hadn’t written down the blocking I gave him. His answer? No. I’m on the verge of telling this jerk to go take a hike because it’s the one part that I don’t really need a body for – I can read the dialogue (it’s the role of The Brain – which is a floating brain on wires in the show – I allowed this guy to play it in the flesh for the reading). People wander in twenty minutes late and they come to me with every sort of excuse and yesterday, in front of the head of the department, I told everyone that I would fail anyone who walked into either of this weekend’s rehearsals even ten seconds late. If I’m to fight the good fight, then my soldiers need to be good soldiers. We’ll find out what they’re made of today and tomorrow.

Of course, I will have had no time to actually direct a performance out of anyone, but that’s another story. I’ll tell you one thing – after this ordeal, there better not be any question at all of a full production next semester.

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, fight the good fight and keep the “I ain’t down yet” spirit alive and well and on the stage of the Camino Theater. Today’s topic of discussion: What’s the longest period you’ve ever gone without sleep and what was the occasion, and when you finally got sleep how long did you sleep? Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, and remember, we ain’t down yet. What am I, Molly Brown all of a sudden?

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