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June 17, 2006:

THE CROOKEDBACKWARD QUESTION

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, I must write these here notes in a hurry because she of the Evil Eye will be here bright and early and also early and bright. I have no time to shilly-shally or even shally-shilly. I must be terse and brief and to the point, and I must not meander or go off on tangents or stray from the point. Of course, it would help if I HAD a point, but that would be asking for too much, now wouldn’t it? I had a point once, back in 1973, but I can’t remember what it was. Damn, I’ve gone off on a tangent, haven’t I? Actually, was that a tangent? Or just a little sidebar? If there’s a sidebar can there be a centerbar? See, now I’m meandering. Actually, am I meandering, or just asking a straightforward question. If there’s a straightforward question can there be a crookedbackward question? I like that. By George and by golly and buy bonds, I think we’ve coined a new phrase here at haineshisway.com. The Crookedbackward Question. Damn, I’m shilly-shallying, aren’t I? Actually, am I shilly-shallying? Or am I just commenting on the absurdity of the English language? Where was I? Oh, yes, I must not meander or go off on tangents or stray from the point because she of the Evil Eye will be here all too soon. Speaking of all too soon, yesterday flew by like a gazelle leaving on a jet plane. All I remember is that I awoke and was suddenly having a lovelier than lovely breakfast with our very own Miss Alet Taylor (actually Mrs. Alet Taylor) and her brand spanking new daughter, Ruby Jean. After that, I came home, did stuff, jogged, did more stuff, got the 100 copies of the Deceit covers that Matthew Ashford and I are going to sign (turned around much faster than I could have imagined), picked up a package, got a few more small checks (third day in a row for small checks – but we love any checks, and we also love any Czechs and also a few Poles, albeit not any ten-foot ones). It looks like I’m doing another small gig for the Music Center – this one records a week from Monday or Tuesday, although it’s dependent on whether the music that we need to record can be prepared quickly enough. All in all, it was a nice day without too too many annoyances.

Last night I watched two count them two motion pictures on DVD. The first motion picture on DVD was entitled I Walk The Line, a film of John Frankenheimer – in fact, one of only two early Frankenheimer films that I hadn’t seen. I Walk The Line is from Frankenheimer’s oddest period, when he seemed to be flailing about and not doing the kind of incredible work he did with such films as The Manchurian Candidate, Seconds, All Fall Down and even his early The Young Savages, and The Young Stranger. I Walk The Line is a really strange film without much point. The screenplay is by Alvin Sargent, but the film just meanders along aimlessly for most of its running time. It’s certainly a handsome-looking film, and the cast is terrific – Gregory Peck (in a somewhat atypical role), the gorgeous Tuesday Weld, Ralph Meeker, and in one of his very early roles, Charles Durning. One mistake that Frankenheimer makes is to have the only music be songs by Johnny Cash. That just about does the film in. Frankenheimer’s music choices in his films, especially his early ones, is impeccable, and only having songs robs the film of any dramatic tension it might have had. One only has to think of David Amram’s brilliant scores to The Young Savages and Manchurian Candidate, or Goldsmith’s score to Seconds, or even Maurice Jarre’s score to Grand Prix, to know how skillfully music works in his films. The transfer from Sony/Columbia is excellent. I then watched the new Special Edition of Patton. To my eyes, the transfer looks the same as the last Special Edition of Patton. I am ashamed to admit, that I’d never seen Patton all the way through. Well, it’s brilliant in every department. George C. Scott really deserves every accolade he’s ever gotten for this performance – it’s phenomenal. Can you imagine if they made this film today? Who would play Patton? Robert Downey, Jr.? Cuba Gooding, Jr.? Alec Baldwin? Johnny Depp? Steve Martin? Robert de Niro? Well, you get the idea. And, of course, Patton 2006 would open with a pre-credits sequence of young Georgie playing “war” with his toy soldiers or his friends and he’d come up against some obstacle or another and he wouldn’t be able to overcome it. Then in the film’s final minutes he would overcome it. Tell me I’m wrong. And the three-hour film would have music from the first frame to the last. One of the marvels of the film is that there’s really only about forty minutes of score in the three-hour film, so that when music is used it actually means something. And what music it is – Jerry Goldsmith at the peak of his powers. Today they’d temp-track the whole film with Hans Zimmer music and the poor sucker they’d get to do the score would have to imitate the temp-track. Certainly, no composer could walk in and start playing those echo-plexed trumpets – they’d be ousted from the recording stage. I wish I could say the transfer was top-notch, but it’s way too soft in the mid to long shots, verging on being out-of-focus. Given that this was a large-format film it should be razor sharp. The color, however, is perfection. Sound is okay, but not robust enough. But, what a film. What a script. What characters, what drama, what photography. They don’t make ’em like this anymore, they just don’t know how. And, it’s not dated – not dated one iota.

What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? Why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below before I start asking some really pointed crookedbackward questions.

Today I shall wander and wonder, not necessarily in that order. I’ll have to be out of the house for about three hours, but I may actually jog before I leave, and then I have to package up about eight Kritzerland orders and get them to the post office. After I return, I shall have a spot of lunch, watch a DVD, and then I’ll be off to see a new musical at the Matrix Theater.

Perhaps next Saturday we shall reinstate our Unseemly Trivia Contest here at haineshisway.com. It’s been a long time since we’ve done it, so if someone reminds me next Thursday, I’ll come up with a question.

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, do all of the above, plus pick up a package or three, and play some new CDs that have just arrived in the mail (including Luis Bonfa’s beautiful score to a movie called The Gentle Rain). Today’s topic of discussion: What are ten of your favorite performances by male actors in motion pictures? Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, and let’s even have a couple of crookedbackward questions while we’re at it.

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