Well, dear readers, it’s the start of a brand spanking new week and we’re heading toward the start of a brand spanking new month. Yes, Virginia, August will soon be over and September will soon be with us and truer words were never spoken. I also feel that it is very important that everyone reading these here notes realizes that September spelled backwards is Rebmetpes. Remember, knowledge is power and, conversely, power is knowledge. You know, there are times when I really do with I had a clew as to what the HELL I was talking about, but apparently I am destined to be clewless. Destined To Be Clewless – that’s the title of my next novel. Speaking of clewless, yesterday flew by like a gazelle driving a Tucker. I slept right up until she of the Evil Eye knocked on the front door. I then got up, got dressed, and got out. I went over to Panera, a local eatery/Internet café, and there I sat, sipping a Diet Pepsi (no Diet Coke) and proofing away. I sat there for two hours, then left, did a few errands, and then came back home. My music person came and we recorded the new song from The Brain and he’ll be doing the sheet music for it so that he can then send elmore the two new songs and one new intro to one of the old songs. After he left, I left. I did a few more errands and then I came back and did some more proofing. I then went to an early dinner, then came back and finally sat on my couch like so much fish. So much for relaxing.
Last night, I did manage to watch three count them three motion pictures on DVD (I’d started one the night before). The first motion picture on DVD was entitled Double Indemnity, the new Special Edition from Universal. I’d had the old Image disc, which was one of the worst DVDs ever, and earlier this year I got the new region 2, which I thought was quite good. I then read many comments that said the region 2 was awful and that they couldn’t wait for the region 1. Then they got the new region 1 and pronounced it wunderbar. Well, a little minor fact for those folks: It’s the same transfer. Oops (spoo, spelled backwards). How the region 2 can be pronounced poor and the region 1 pronounced wunderbar when they’re exactly the same is anyone’s guess. My guess is that these people are stupid. The new US DVD is perhaps a hair sharper, but it’s basically the same, and certainly the source material is exactly the same. Nothing much to say about the film – it’s a masterpiece in every way, and has incredible and quotable dialogue, great performances, and great direction by Billy Wilder. They don’t make ’em like that anymore. I then watched the “documentary” about the film. Just when I think these things have reached rock bottom, I see one that goes lower. I’m sorry – I never need to see these people again – the likes of Richard Schickel and Drew Casper (if there’s a more pompous, obnoxious person who appears in these “documentaries” I haven’t seen him/her – favorite Drew Casper line from this thing: “Edward G. Robinson – a known character actor.” THANKS DREW!), Silver, Ward, Ursini, Muller, I mean ENOUGH. All recounting the same stories that they read in the same places, not one of who has one interesting new fact to present. I guess I understand why James Ellroy is in there, but he says nothing interesting. I’m thinking about writing a comedy film that will star Mr. Schickel and Mr. Casper – The Two Stooges. And people are PRAISING this! I then watched the second motion picture on DVD, which was entitled Taps, the new 25th anniversary edition. Taps is not the story of the Nicholas Brothers, it is a story about a military academy. The film was made in 1981 and it holds up quite well. In just a few short years, American filmmaking would begin its steady decline into the mind-numbing awfulness that is modern filmmaking. Taps is well-written and nicely directed by Harold Becker, and it features a terrific cast of young actors like Timothy Hutton, Sean Penn, and Tom Cruise, along with veteran George C. Scott, and a lovely supporting performance by Ronny Cox. It doesn’t quite achieve greatness, but it’s a fine motion picture, despite being a little too long for its own good. One can only imagine what this film would be like were it made today. Well, one doesn’t have to imagine – if you watch the “documentary” you’ll see in the first twenty seconds what it would have been like – thumping, awful music and sound effects over the title sequence of the supposed “documentary.” Can you imagine a film today having the nerve to not have one note of musical scoring until the fifty-four minute mark, which is when the first note of original Maurice Jarre music occurs? Can you imagine a film today not making “whoosh” sounds every time the fershluganah camera pans?
What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? Why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because I’ve got yet one more DVD to talk about. Oh, goodie.
I then watched the third motion picture on DVD, which was entitled Looking For Comedy In the Muslim World, one of the worst titles in the history of motion pictures. Any chance the film had went right into the toilet with that title. The film is written and directed by Albert Brooks, someone who has made two films which were marginal break-evens – otherwise all his films are money-losers, and yet he keeps making films, which is a good thing if you like his brand of humor. This $10,000,000 film grossed under $800,000. I will say that there were a few one-liners and a few sequences that made me laugh out loud, but too much of the film is labored and unfunny – there is one endless sequence of Mr. Brooks performing a comedy routine and bombing in front of an audience in New Delhi. It’s a funny idea for about thirty seconds, but goes on for about ten or twelve minutes. Mr. Brooks plays someone named Albert Brooks who is asked to go to India and Pakistan to find out what makes people in those cultures laugh. The funniest thing in the film is when Mr. Brooks first goes to his office in New Delhi – he passes another office which is filled with computers and people answering calls from US consumers with questions about their Dell computers, amazon orders, their Gap orders, and all manner of products. The film does have one absolutely perfect thing in it, and it is the performance of Sheetal Sheth, as an Indian girl Mr. Brooks hires to help him. She is incandescent and it’s a wonderful performance. Apparently, she’s from New Jersey. Go know.
Today I will hopefully be going to Mr. Grant Geissman’s to finish importing the last two stories into their formatted versions, plus entering all the little corrections on the first five stories. After that, I’ll be joining our very own Mr. Nick Redman, and we’ll be seeing a musical evening entitled A Little Travelin’ Music, with Eric Levitton and Michael Kostroff.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, jog, work with Mr. Geissman, and then see a show, as well as have a dining adventure somewhere. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s free-for-all day, the day in which you dear readers get to make with the topics and we all get to post about them. So, lets’ have loads of lovely topics and loads of lovely postings, shall we? And, above all, let’s remember that I am destined to be clewless.