Well, dear readers, I am beginning these here notes live from the plane, whilst flying home to Los Angeles, California, USA. Once again, I am lucky enough to have one of those car seat things, although thankfully it’s in the window seat and the mom is next to me. Unlike the first trip, this is a toddler. And a restless toddler who is kicking and throwing food and hitting her mother in the eye with her cup. O joy! O rapture! Earlier, about three-forty-five in the morning to be exact, I got up, got ready, and met my car outside at four-fifteen. The ride to the airport was very quick, about thirty minutes. I got through security very quickly, with no fuss or bother, then went to the President’s Club, where it was my intention to post up a storm – only I couldn’t post up a storm because I could not get on the fershluganah Internet, despite my Airport showing full bars. It seems that when I set up a “New location” for AOL, so I could get on the Internet via dial-up at the apartment, it somehow changed the settings and now nothing works in terms of getting on the Internet via AOL or Safari or any other way. I tried unchecking and checking various things, which I’m sure screwed things up even more. AOL – the worst. I nuked the New Location and number thing, but that didn’t help. Somehow, the entire computer is now on dial-up only, so as soon as I get to the home environment I have to call Apple Care and have them walk me through the steps to fix the problem. I think once we fix it for Safari that it will fix it for AOL, as well. So, I sat in the President’s Club for the entire time trying to fix the problem that’s apparently too difficult for me to fix. I got on the plane, got my seat, and tried shutting my eyes, but the car seat arrived and I had to get up and wait for ten minutes while they attached it and moved in all their stuff. Then we sat at the gate for fifteen minutes, while some “stuff” was delivered. We finally pulled away from the gate, but of course by that time we were behind, so instead of taking right off we were in a line of ten planes. By the time we’d gotten to be number two in the lineup, they stopped all traffic. By the time we finally took off we’d been on the runway for twenty-five minutes. Finally we were airborne. This toddler is most annoying, kicking, screaming, and it’s going to be a long five hours, I can tell. I’m just waiting for the trips to the bathroom to begin. And the mother? She just keeps trying to go to sleep, which is something I surely won’t be able to do. The aisles are clogged with the food carts now – I’m thinking about having an egg sandwich. Pray for Rosemary’s Baby. More in a moment.
Well, I’ve eaten this thing they call egg and cheese on a biscuit. It’s not a food experience I need to repeat. Meanwhile, the toddler has been kicking the seat in front of her mercilessly. The mother keeps saying stop, and this only makes the toddler more determined to kick the chair more mercilessly. The mother keeps saying to the child, “Nap? Want a nap?” I think we all know when this child is going to take her nap – as we’re landing, that’s when the child will fall asleep. Until then, she’ll just continue her screaming, crying, kicking, and ripping pages out of the Sky Mall catalog. I was thinking of offering to tell the child THE STORY OF JERRY AND THE DOG – but while the child might like zoo stories, I’m not sure she’s ready for Mr. Edward Albee. The mom’s husband is a row ahead on the other side, where he sits with the well-behaved daughter. Mom is once again trying to sleep. I don’t think so. There’s close to three-and-a-half more hours of flight time. The child is now sucking on her blanket, watching her mother try to sleep. Now she’s looking at me. I smiled. She put her finger in her ear. There is no bathroom in the front – just two in the rear. That is annoying, because they sit empty, and then as soon as someone gets up to use them, EVERYONE ELSE gets up to use them. The child is currently trying to poke her own eye out – this seems to amuse her. This might be a good time for me to try and get some sleep. I guess not. The child looked at her sleeping mother and decided she didn’t like that, and so she began screaming for the mother. I gotta tell you.
A DVD player has magically appeared. I suppose this will be used to distract the child. We’ll just see. It seems to be working. This might be a good time for me to get some sleep.
We’re now about a half-hour from landing. I got about two hours of on-and-off-again snoozing. Mother and daughter also finally fell asleep. Funnily, the dad’s good daughter is now wailing like a banshee. Go know. In any case, despite promises to the contrary, we are going to be about fifteen minutes late because of all the delays getting out of Newark. Getting Out Of Newark – that’s the title of my next novel.
Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below whilst I think about telling the wailing child THE STORY OF JERRY AND THE DOG.
And here I am, back in the home environment, safe and sound, the house clean and, better yet, cool as a cucumber. We arrived in LA about twenty minutes late thanks to the delay in Newark. The first thing I did was plug in the computer so I could call Apple Care and have them talk me through whatever I needed to fix, but I’m happy to report that as soon as the computer booted up, it was obvious that all was well. So, maybe after I did whatever I did in the airport, I just needed to reboot. In any case, it’s so wonderful to be back on high-speed – one forgets just how appallingly slow dial-up is. I then unpacked, and then I had to drive down to LACC, where I’m happy to say I got payment one of three for our fundraiser, so as long as the second payments come along without too much fuss, I think we’re over the hump, so many thanks for the excellent vibes and xylophones. I then had to get mail, do a few errands, and then I came back and went through the mail that came when I was gone. The best thing that arrived was a signed musical quote for our silent auction – and it’s a doozy: A full-sized quote from Not A Day Goes By, on music paper, signed at the bottom. I may have to bid on it myself. I’d already gotten a signed quote from Stephen Schwartz – a couple of bars from Popular. Also enclosed in the envelope was a very nice note from my close personal friend, Mr. Stephen Sondheim, saying we can have a drink when I’m back in New York in a couple of weeks, so I’ll look forward to that. In fact, I’m hoping to get him to attend The Brain From Planet X.
Then there was more stuff with the actress – all the little things we had to work out were worked out, and yet we could not get her agent to return a call and just give a simple acknowledgment that we were a done deal. I’m so bored of this part of the game, and I’m afraid I’ve been rather strong about it to my general manager and casting guy – the latter has thanked me for my patience and asked me to be patient for one day more, and hopefully not a full day. I’ve agreed, but it’s got to be wrapped up today because if I’m to spend another weekend wondering whether I have someone to play one of the leading roles, I’ll wonder with a different actress. I just hope it’s all signed, sealed, and delivered early in the day. Finally, after all that, I sat on my couch like so much fish.
Last night, I watched two motion pictures on DVD (but only because they were both very short). The first motion picture on DVD was entitled Side Street, a film noir directed by the great Anthony Mann, starring Mr. Farley Granger and Miss Cathy O’Donnell along with a host of terrific character actors. It’s a nifty little noir, with great on location photography by Joseph Ruttenberg – the shots of late 40s New York are breathtaking. The story moves right along, the players do a fine job, and Mr. Mann’s direction, as always, is impeccable. I then watched the second motion picture on DVD, which was entitled Tension, another film noir starring Mr. Richard Basehart, Mr. Barry Sullivan, and most importantly Miss Audrey Totter, who is wonderful in the film. The film is very good, with excellent direction by the then about to be blacklisted John Berry. Miss Totter is truly one of the great bad girls of cinema, and Mr. Basehart gives a fine performance. Mr. Sullivan’s cop character is so out of line for most of the film, behaving unprofessionally and immorally, that you can’t really say he’s a good cop just getting the job done – he’s really sort of loathsome. Tension was also mostly shot on location, and most of the locations were very close to MGM Studios in Culver City. My favorite scene took place outside and inside the Culver Theater (now the Kirk Douglas) – how great to see it in its glory days. Both transfers are excellent.
Today is a day off, save for whatever telephonic calls I have to have, and whatever e-mails I have to answer. I’m really overtired, and must be rested so I can devote all my energy to each and every day prior to leaving to start rehearsals for The Brain.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, do as little as possible, and I do hope to hear good news during the day. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s Friday – what is currently in your CD player, and your DVD/video player? I’ll start – CD, car A Certain Mr. Jobim, a terrific CD, home, Norman Dello Joio’s wonderful score to a 50s TV documentary entitled Air Power, and also a beautifully cleaned up CD transfer of Evening Primrose, the soundtrack from the TV show, taken from my minty fresh LP. DVD, more noir coming up, plus some Esther Williams. Your turn. Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I finally tell THE STORY OF JERRY AND THE DOG.