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February 2, 2009:

VALLEY OF THE DILLS

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, February is already flying by, like a gazelle singing I’ll Plant My Own Tree. I wonder if Miss Jacqueline Susann had been Jewish and worked in a deli if she would have written Valley Of The Dills? That would have been a great book, actually, and an even better movie. In addition to the title song, they could have had a song called I’ll Do My Own Bris, and also Come Kvetch With Me. Yes, I’m liking this idea of Valley Of The Dills. Shvitz, Neeley, Shvitz. I need dills! What the HELL am I talking about? These notes are so Jewish all of a sudden. Speaking of Jewish all of a sudden, yesterday was a day in which I felt logey almost the entire day and evening. I got up a little earlier than I’d planned, revised some of the previous day’s writing, and then wrote four pages, finishing the chapter I was on. I then printed out approximately fifty-four pages, got them Xeroxed and delivered them to muse Margaret for her mental delectation. I then came home and did the long jog, which seemed longer than usual due to my going so slowly. I then went to Gelson’s and got some foodstuffs and came back home. Muse Margaret called to tell me how much she liked this batch of pages, and other than two tiny little suggestions which took about ten seconds to do, she had no problems at all. So, it’s on to the final fifty-something pages of the book now. I then sat on my couch like so much fish, ate my foodstuffs, put on a DVD and kept falling asleep. I wrote one more page, just to begin the new chapter, and then I sat on my couch like so much fish, once again.

Last night, I watched several things on DVD. The first thing I watched on DVD was another episode of The Prisoner. What an interesting show it is. I’m not quite fanatical about it as some, but it is very well done and quite weird at times. I then watched a DVD of a play by David Storey entitled Home, directed by Lindsay Anderson, and starring Mr. Ralph Richardson and Mr. John Gielgud, with Mona Washbourne and Dandy Nichols in support. The play is one of those early 1970s elliptical pieces filled with half-sentences and pauses and occasionally odd lines. But the characters are interesting, and the two women are quite funny. But it’s Richardson and Gielgud who are the reasons it’s a must-see – what brilliant actors they were, the kind they just don’t make anymore. Every look, every nuance, every line reading is just so masterful that it’s an exhilarating experience watching them work. It’s a very static piece, but it’s only ninety minutes all in, and Mr. Anderson keeps it chugging along. The play doesn’t add up to much, but I enjoyed it. I then watched a motion picture on DVD entitled The Hollywood Sign, a film I’d never heard of before, made in 2001. I thought the premise sounded like fun, and I liked the cast – Rod Steiger, Burt Reynolds, and Tom Berenger. The opening scene is somewhat amusing, with Berenger and Reynolds playing actors playing cops. But I’m afraid it all goes downhill swiftly from there. Characters behave so stupidly and do things that make no sense, which is, of course, due to very bad writing. It’s not that the plot couldn’t have worked, but at every turn it just gets stupider and stupider, culminating in one of the most poorly written and directed scenes I’ve ever seen. I’ve said it before but it bears repeating – if a movie can’t obey the rules of its own universe then it will fail every time. And that’s the problem with this film – you can’t take any of it seriously and therefore it’s a complete failure, other than the three stars having some fun. In fact, I was especially impressed with Mr. Berenger, an actor I normally don’t care for. He’s very good in this film. But the film itself is just plain bad. So bad, in fact, it went direct to video.

Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below whilst we all think about Miss Jacqueline Susann’s alternate universe book and film, Valley Of The Dills.

Today I may or may not do the long jog – we’ll see how I feel (I’ve just done five days in a row so it wouldn’t hurt to have a day off). I will then write at least five pages, and then I have a three-hour work session with the composer and lyricist of the long musical. That’s on the other side of the hill, and I’ll be coming home in terrible rush hour traffic. And then I’ll be meeting with Mr. David Wechter at a local eatery to go over all the new Nudie Musical stuff, to finesse and make sure we like it all. And then I’ll come home – don’t know if I’ll have time to watch a DVD or not.

Tomorrow, I have a three-hour work session with Mr. Sean McDermott, also over the hill and also I’ll be coming home at terrible rush hour. So, for these two days I’ll really have to try to bang out these new pages in the morning. I also keep waffling on one plot point – the nice thing is I don’t have to decide for a few more pages. I’m sure I’ll figure out the right way to go very soon.

All right, then, let’s all put on our pointy party hats and our colored tights and pantaloons, let’s all break out the cheese slices and the ham chunks, let’s all dance the Hora and the Monkey, because we’ve got us another two birthdays to celebrate. The first birthday belongs to our very own dear reader Ben. So, let’s give a big haineshisway.com birthday cheer to our very own dear reader Ben. On the count of three: One, two, three – A BIG HAINESHISWAY.COM BIRTHDAY CHEER TO OUR VERY OWN DEAR READER BEN!!! The second birthday belongs to the very errant and truant occasional dear reader Iris. So, let’s give a big haineshisway.com birthday cheer to the very errant and truant occasional dear reader Iris. On the count of three: One, two, three – A BIG HAINESHISWAY.COM BIRTHDAY CHEER TO THE VERY ERRANT AND TRUANT OCCASIONAL DEAR READER IRIS!!!

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, maybe do the long jog, write, have a three-hour work session, and then have a dinner meeting. Today’s topic of discussion: Who are your all-time favorite British actors and actresses? Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst we all come up with the plot of Valley Of The Dills. Let’s keep it lively, too, or we’ll have to call it Valley Of The Dulls.

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