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July 6, 2009:

I’LL TELL YOU NO LIE

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, yesterday was an absolutely fabulous day, one of the best ever. Now, there, you see what I did there? I told a lie. It was an easy lie to tell and had I not told you it was a lie you would have believed it. The fact is, yesterday was a strange and not-so-wonderful day, and it had to do with a mile of lies, none of them emanating from me. But here’s the thing about lies – they are, at their worst, destructive, hurtful, hateful, and vile. And I know whereof I speak when I speak of lies, and I am not proud of that fact. But those who read these here notes regularly know that I pull no punches and I punch no pulls. My habitual lying habit began in my teen years. I don’t need to go into the details, but suffice it to say that I was a good, no, excellent liar. I told lies with ease and because I was a good actor people believed the lies. Those teen lies were not hurtful, and were mostly told to my parents about various and sundried things. It became easy to lie – easier than dealing with conversations I didn’t care to have. And once you go down that road it becomes an addiction. Suddenly you’re lying to other people, just to avoid conversations or scenes or actually having to talk something out that has to do with the truth of the situation. I married when I was twenty years old. It’s not much of a secret that I was too young to be married or that I didn’t especially want to BE married to the woman (or young lady – she was all of nineteen) that I married. But I stayed married for fourteen years (with one year off for good behavior). The marriage itself, of course, was a lie. There was nothing there. But we stayed because we thought it best for the darling daughter. And it was not a bad marriage, it was just nothing – a void. I like to avoid a void and yet I did not avoid a void, I stayed in the void and I was not happy, oh, no, I was not happy. And so for the entire duration of that marriage, I lied. Over and over and over. And I got caught – over and over and over, but somehow always talked myself out of it because a) I told more lies, and b) I was a very good actor. I wasn’t proud of the lies, but I just didn’t want to deal with the pain and scenes if I was to actually say what I was actually feeling. It was easier to lie. And so it went right up to the divorce. I was, at the time, seeing another woman, and I lied about that and got caught and it was awful and disgusting and I knew it. And from that moment on I said no more lies. Ever. Ever. And then karma caught up with me. Karma always catches up with people who do negative things and boy did I pay, karma-wise. I paid a heavy price and I paid it for almost eight years, until, I guess, I’d paid enough and things turned around. And since the day of my divorce I have not told a lie to anyone – unless it was just to avoid being not nice if I didn’t like someone’s performance or play or whatever. And even then, I don’t flat out lie, I just finesse. And you know what – I feel so much better for not lying. I feel free and at ease and don’t feel like I’m dodging being caught every ten seconds.

All that as a prologue to what happened yesterday, which I will also not go into detail about, other than to say it involved a trail of lies so long that it was actually mind-boggling. The joke is, of course, I knew it. I knew it but I chose to give trust and belief because I thought that would help. And in the end, it didn’t – the lies kept on coming and every time a confrontation would happen there would be a mighty tap dance, more lies, and on it went, until I finally did what I needed to do to bring it all out in the open. And finally – the blessed truth arrived, and while the truth isn’t always a pretty thing, it’s a freeing thing and it was good to finally get everything out in the open so it could be discussed and analyzed. And that was how the day began. I did get a great night’s sleep and didn’t arise until ten-thirty, so that was faboo. Then I knew that I had to take the proverbial bull by the proverbial horns and I did what I needed to do and spent the next couple of hours dealing with it. I then took the two-mile jog, which was very helpful, then spent some time contemplating everything, which is always helpful. I then ate some lunch, took a drive, and then a long shower, where I washed off the morning. I then sat on my couch like so much fish.

Last night, I watched a motion picture entitled Short Circuit, starring Mr. Steve Guttenberg and Miss Ally Sheedy and, of course, Number Five. I hadn’t seen it since it came out in the mid-1980s. I liked it okay then so I got the Blu-Ray. The first third of the film is a very tough slog, especially the leaden Mr. Guttenberg. But once Number Five meets Miss Sheedy, things at least get enjoyable. It’s all rather silly and the humor is very forced at times, but the robot stuff is really well done and Miss Sheedy is a spunky heroine. It’s amazing how much Wall*E resembles Number Five in certain specific ways. David Shire provides a whimsical score, which is sometimes a bit too whimsical and a bit too overloaded with synth drums and stuff. Fisher Stevens is very funny as an Indian (as in India) co-worker – some of his malaprops are really funny but they overstay their welcome. John Badham does his customary good job directing. The Blu-Ray is very nice.

Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below whilst I quote one of my all-time favorite movie lines, written by Mr. Billy Wilder and Mr. Harry Kurnitz: “The question is were you lying then or are you lying now or whether, in fact, you are a chronic and habitual LIAR!” Beautifully spoken by Mr. Charles Laughton. And that’s no lie.

Today, I shall be doing the long jog, doing errands and whatnot, planning out the rest of the week, and then having dinner with our very own Cason Murphy to discuss several upcoming projects.

I received from a dear reader a download of the national tour of The Unsinkable Molly Brown – what an astonishing gift. My very first original Broadway musical that I ever saw, here in LA at the Biltmore Theater, and now, thanks to the dear reader, I am reliving seeing it – I believe it’s the entire show taped from the audience and it sounds surprisingly good, and the audience loved the show and everything is just as I remembered it. What a treat!

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, do the long jog, do errands and whatnot, ship a few more packages, hopefully pick up a package or three, and sup with Mr. Cason Murphy. Today’s topic of discussion: What are your favorite Billy Wilder films – he’s one of my favorite writer/directors and all his films are filled with brilliantly quotable dialog – so, favorite Wilder films and favorite dialog quote from said films. Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, for that would make me most happy – and that is no lie.

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