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February 3, 2012:

WELL!

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, these here notes will be short and sweet, which, of course, is better than them being long and sour. I am simply exhausted, seeing double or maybe even triple and I need a peaceful night’s beauty sleep. Why, you might ask, am I simply exhausted and I might tell you because why should I keep such information from you dear readers out there in the dark. I am exhausted because I’ve been up since eight-thirty. I am exhausted because I finished proofing the book. I am exhausted because other than eating an early lunch, I have not been away from the computer for more than an hour from one o’clock on. Once I finished proofing, I had a brief conversation with muse Margaret because in reading the last chapter certain things felt like padding and I wanted to make sure she was okay with me cutting them. I read through the four things with her and she agreed with me completely. It’s probably a page overall, but since I knew I’d be adding a page or two in the beginning of the book, it all evens out.

After that, I began entering the fixes, additions, and deletions. This is a five-hundred-plus page manuscript and it’s really slow going to do it. The little word fixes or punctuation fixes are easy, of course, but it all takes time and there are things on almost every page – sometimes I get away with three or four pages without any changes, but about ninety percent of it has at least one or two little things on every page. But there were also a few additions, which I sketched out when I was proofing, but then actually had to write, so that takes time. And then sometimes I look at something I thought should be corrected and I have to think about whether I’m right or wrong – that takes time. I worked straight from one to about six and then I had to stop and sit on my couch like so much fish.

Last night, I watched another one-hour Jack Benny Special. The quality of these homegrown DVDs is superb. This, Jack’s second NBC special from 1966, guest-starred Phyllis Diller, The Smothers Brothers, and Trini Lopez. The best of it was Jack and the Smothers – truly laugh out loud funny. Even better is when Jack goes to announce a special guest that no one knows about – Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass. Only they couldn’t make it, so they’ve been replaced by the Tijuana Strings. Out they come, led by Mel Blanc – he and Jack then proceed to do their famous Si, Sy, Sue routine, and it doesn’t matter how many times you’ve seen it, it’s just a riot. Best of all, they then play Julius Wechter’s Spanish Flea. Diller is pretty funny, too. I’m looking forward to the rest of the specials, after which I’ll dive in to the other thirty-five DVDs of the half-hour shows. As Jack would say, “Well!”

After my hour break it was back to the computer, where I sat from seven until eleven-thirty, at which point I could not see straight and had to stop. So, I was able to get through 314 pages of this madness, and tomorrow when I’m fresh, I shall endeavor to finish. There are no more significant additions from this point on, so that will help speed things along. My plan is to be finished by the late afternoon and then I can get the book to two of the proofers who get it by e-mail, and then Xerox a copy for the other proofer.

Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because I am in need of a peaceful night’s beauty sleep.

Today, I shall hopefully arise after a good night’s beauty sleep. I will mush on with the entering fixes. I don’t know whether I’ll jog or not, we’ll have to see how it’s all going. Then I’ll eat something light but amusing, then I’ll hopefully pick up some packages and an important envelope, then I’ll come home and finish. After that, I’ll send off the e-mail copies, and I’ll relax and watch Jack Benny specials or a movie.

Tomorrow, I have to go to storage to gather hundreds of photos from the record producing years – from those we’ll choose what will end up in the book. Then we have our stumble-through, then I’m having an early dinner with the family Hollis, then I’m sitting on my couch like so much fish. Sunday is sound check and show time. I’m told we’re very light, audience-wise, thanks to the stupider than stupid Stupid Bowl.

Once again we must put on our pointy party hats and colored tights and pantaloons, once again we must break out the cheese slices and the ham chunks, once again we must dance the Hora and the Swim, because today is the birthday of the VERY errant and truant dear reader Edisaurus. So, let’s give a big haineshisway.com birthday cheer to the VERY errant and truant dear reader Edisaurus. On the count of three: One, two, three – A BIG HAINESHISWAY.COM BIRTHDAY CHEER TO THE VERY ERRANT AND TRUANT DEAR READER EDISAURUS!!!

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, enter fixes, maybe jog, eat, hopefully pick up packages and an important envelope, finish entering fixes and then relax. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s Friday – what is currently in your CD player, and your DVD/video player? I’ll start – CD, A Thurber Carnival. DVD, Jack Benny. Blu and Ray, probably Notorious. Your turn. Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I hit the road to dreamland where I shall undoubtedly dream of entering fixes, and Jack Benny saying, “Well!”

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