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March 21, 2017:

WHIRLING DERVISH DAY

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, this week is flying by, like a gazelle twirling like a whirling dervish. I myself tried to twirl like a whirling dervish and the next thing I knew I was laying on the floor thinking of asparagus soup. Go know. In any case, I must now write these here notes like a whirling dervish, or, at the very least, like a dervish sans whirling.

Yesterday, I only got about six hours of sleep – just couldn’t fall asleep for quite a long while. Once up, I printed out some orders, answered some e-mails, had some telephonic conversations and then went and had an omelet and a bagel. I then picked up one package – it had been stamped with “Opened and Inspected by the USPS.” This irritated me for some reason and thus began the ordeal of trying to get a human on the phone at the USPS, which actually proved impossible. In fact, someone should launch a class action lawsuit against the USPS – at some point in a fifteen-minute ordeal you should be able to connect to a human – to not be able to should be against some kind of law. The USPS is here to serve US, not the other way around. After THAT frustration, I called the Studio City branch and got a supervisor on the phone. She explained to me that with media mail packages they have the right to open and inspect because so many jerks abuse media mail. I explained to her that it was a little Big Brotherish for my taste, but it’s what it is.

I did some banking, and then some work on the computer, and then got ready for our little informal reading of the musical – mostly for the technical designers. Hearing it out loud is always fascinating and it was indeed fascinating. I took quite a few notes and now I will present them to the authors in a positive way, just to see if they think any of them make sense – if so, I would hope we can make those adjustments pre going into rehearsal. We had ten actors – we did it in my den – a bit crowded but it was fun and everyone did a good job. After that, some of us hung out and chatted, and then everyone left.

I made a bit of pasta with butter and cheese for my evening snack, answered yet more e-mails and did yet more work on the computer, and then I finally sat on my couch like so much fish.

Last night, I wasn’t in the mood to really watch anything, so naturally I chose a movie that I knew would probably be mind-numbingly bad. I chose well. Reclaim was the name of the movie, basically an adoption scam thriller. The film is a casebook example of Screenwriting 101 and at every point in the movie one minute before something happened I said out loud what it would be – and never failed calling every single plot point. Screenwriters today are basically kids weaned on bad 90s crap and they have their little screenwriting books and the fact that anyone would actually make this crap is the real astonishment. The acting was sub-par, although I enjoy watching John Cusack, who has the oddest career, if you can call it that, outside of Nicholas Cage. And Jackie Weaver – this woman was up for an Oscar, but in this film she gives one of the all-time worst performances in the history of cinema and also happens to be the twin of Sally Struthers in this movie. Terrible score, terrible direction and, of course, outside of playing a day or two in ten theaters, straight to VOD and DVD.

After that, I relaxed a bit, listened to some music, and that was my whirling dervish day. Actually, I think we should make that an official haineshisway.com day – Whirling Dervish Day. I like it!

Today, I have a lot of little things to do, and then I have some folks coming over to work on something, and we’ll probably all go out for a bite to eat after. I’ll hopefully pick up some packages, too.

Tomorrow I have a meeting with my set designer and a work session with John Boswell for the Kritzerland show. Thursday I’m hoping to go visit our very own Mr. Nick Redman for an hour or two, then that evening I’m seeing Fun Home. Not sure what the weekend holds in store, and then it’s our Kritzerland rehearsal week.

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, do a lot of little things, hopefully pick up some packages, work on something, eat, and relax. Today’s topic of discussion: What are your favorite pet peeves involving the USPS? Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I hit the road to dreamland, where I shall get ready to celebrate the official haineshisway.com day – Whirling Dervish Day.

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