Haines Logo Text
Column Archive
June 22, 2019:


Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, I have survived the ordeal of the DMV visit. I discovered upon arrival twenty-five minutes early that having a two o’clock appointment didn’t really mean anything. I was told to stand in a line for people with appointments.  The people in front of me, who each too about ten minutes with the processing guy, weren’t even in the right line.  Once I got to him, I had to pull out all the documents I’d brought, and he looked through each one and noted it.  The one document he didn’t even look at even though I held it in front of his eyeballs was my confirmation number showing that I’d actually done all the paperwork online and didn’t need to do it at the DMV.  He could have passed me on to the window, but instead I had to wait, be taken to the room where they give the test, but when I showed them the paper they told me to go directly to Window 0.  By the time I got to that window it was two o’clock.  There were two people in front of me, neither of which had the right paperwork but still gabbed endlessly.

Once I got up to her, she looked at all my paperwork and immediately questioned one of the two residence papers I’d brought.  She said they would not accept it.  I countered with it was exactly what was suggested online. She said it had to be an insurance BILL, but that is NOT what it said online – what it said online was something with the address from one’s insurance company.  At that point, I began to get very hyper and annoyed.  She asked if I had my car registration with me and I told her it was in the car.  She said that would work, to go get it, and come right back up to the window.  One minute later, I was back with the registration only to find her helping someone else, who ALSO didn’t have the right paperwork but who would not stop gabbing.  The woman didn’t even glance up to see I was standing there and eventually someone else came and took care of it and even got a little snippy when I told her that the other lady had said to come right back up and that she had all my documents.  Then I was told to sit and wait to have my number called.

That took another ten minutes.  I then proceeded to that window, where I had a very nice lady. She looked through the documents, did whatever she had to do, took my thumbprint, gave me the form (not a license, just the form filled out), and then administered the eye test.  I was so worried about it that that’s why I had the eye exam and got new glasses.  But I’d left the glasses in the car, even when I went back to get the registration, because I was in a hurry and annoyed.  But it didn’t matter – both eyes passed with flying colors – I did not make any errors on any of the letters with both eyes, and then each eye with the other covered.  Even she was amazed.  Then I was told to go to the photo window.  I did, and thankfully there was no one in line there, and that gal was really funny, we took the photo and then I was told to sit and that someone would come and get me to take the test.

That took another ten minutes, then I was led to a kiosk with a computer touch screen and I took the test.  Now, I’d been taking the online DMV official sample tests every single day and had passed all of them – and they’re different every day.  They don’t have as many questions, only ten, but you figure with all those questions you get a pretty good sampling of what’s in store for you.  Well, guess what – I’m not sure exactly how many questions there were – I’m guessing maybe around sixteen – only TWO of those questions were things that had been in the sample tests.  TWO. And there were a few questions that were so arcane that I hadn’t even noticed them in the handbook, especially the one about the percentage of alcohol you can have in your body and still legally drive.  I don’t drink so that didn’t even really register with me, and yes, that was one of the three questions I got wrong.  The other two were just so weird and the answers so designed to be confusing – in any case, you’re allowed the three mistakes and I passed.  Then I went to a man at a desk and he gave me my interim license and that was the end of the ordeal at the DMV.  I was there a total of ninety minutes and didn’t leave until after three.  And that’s WITH the appointment.  Can you even imagine the wait time if you didn’t have one?

But I was thrilled to be out of there and done with all that. I went directly to the bank, did some business there, ascertained there was no mail or packages to gather up, and went to Jerry’s Deli for a little celebratory meal.  I had a Philly cheesesteak sandwich and a side Caesar, both excellent.  Then I finally came home, rather exhausted from the long, stress-filled day.  I answered e-mails, had some telephonic conversations, and then Richard Allen came over and he played through some very rare cut material by Cole Porter and Kander and Ebb.  I’ll probably do three or four of these things spread out over the next couple of shows.  I have to ascertain what a few of these were cut FROM.  One is definitely Chicago and one is definitely Woman of the Year, but I’m not sure about the others.  Then I moseyed on over to a local neo-Mexican jernt for a birthday partay for Alexa and her sister Mia.  I met some nice folks, had some nice conversations, and had a little appetizer thing called ceviche or something like that.  I was there about ninety minutes, then came home, still exhausted.  Plus, it was really loud in there with LOUD, thumping music. Once home, I did a little work on the computer and that was that.

Today, I will definitely sleep in, then I’m seeing a matinee at four of some ten-minute plays, very few of which actually run ten minutes – many are longer.  After that, I’m sure we’ll grab a bite to eat, then I’ll come home and relax.

Tomorrow, I can have a ME day, then next week is all meetings and meals and choosing songs and going and doing as well as doing and going.

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, sleep in, hopefully pick up packages, see a matinee, sup, and relax.  Today’s topic of discussion: What is the longest you’ve ever had to wait in line? On hold?  Where?  Why? Did you kill anyone?  Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I hit the road to dreamland, happy to be done with the ordeal of the DMV visit and happy that it had a happy ending.

Search BK's Notes Archive:
© 2001 - 2019 by Bruce Kimmel. All Rights Reserved