Haines Logo Text
Column Archive
April 3, 2020:

THE QUASI-STUPOR

Bruce Kimmel Photograph bk's notes

Well, dear readers, I am in a quasi-stupor as are others I have to imagine, because I’m told that the quasi-stupor is going around due to the other thing that’s going around and, of course, the world goes round if Kander & Ebb are to be believed and I think the quasi-stupor is going to turn into a full-fledged stupor and then where will we all be, I ask you?  We’ll be in Stuporland, that’s where we’ll all be, if you ask me and since I asked you it’s only right that you ask me. And I suppose in Stuporland I’ll be Stuporman.  Now, this paragraph and every word contained in it is what happens when you make an old Jew stay home for three weeks with no human contact other than food, and how human is food, I ask you or you ask me?  I have had no human contact except for the guy who delivered me a Jersey Mike’s sandwich this evening.  He was supposed to ring the bell and leave but the way the sandwich was wrapped there was no real place to leave it as it wasn’t in a proper bag.  A Proper Bag – that’s the title of my next novel, which I began writing yesterday and am already 536 pages in and that’s only the first sentence.  Where was I?  Oh, yeah, the Door Dash guy handed me the sandwich, which I took gingerly from his ungloved hand.  I took it to the kitchen and went and washed my hands immediately with the soap and the water.  The Soap and the Water – wasn’t that a Cecil B. DeMille movie?  Once I was germ free, although I never touched the actual hand of the Door Dash person, I ate the sandwich and it was a good sandwich that didn’t quite achieve getting me out of my quasi-stupor.  Why is this paragraph feeling like an Ionesco play?

Yesterday, I was in a quasi-stupor.  I woke up after eight hours of sleep in a semi-stupor but then that turned into a quasi-stupor soon thereafter.  Once up, I answered e-mails, got the new galley, which I could not approve because they removed two blank pages at the end, which needed to be there, so they’re putting them back and perhaps today I’ll be able to approve the damn galley.  Then I went to the mail place and picked up one package that contained two items.  I came directly home.  I waffled back and forth about food but was too chicken to spend yet another thirty bucks on a meal – yes, I was a living chicken and waffle.  I finally just fried two eggs and put them into two tortillas (one per tortilla, in case anyone is in a quasi-stupor) and then I ate them all up.  Just 440 calories for the two.  Then I did a few things that I actually don’t remember doing so I cannot tell you what those things were, and I suppose I finally sat on my couch like so much fish.

Yesterday, I finished watching Gun Fury in 2-D, a middling western as westerns go and I love westerns.  The plot was middling, the dialogue was middling, but the actors were good.  I’m glad to have seen it as there were quite a few amusing 3-D effects that looked downright or upleft silly in 2-D.  After that, I watched a motion picture on a new Criterion Blu and Ray entitled Showboat, the 1936 version.  I must say, I think it’s a great movie, beautifully directed by Mr. James Whale, and featuring wonderful performances from its large cast.  Yes, yes, yes, our little PC crowd probably wants to erase this film from history because they can’t see beyond their 2020 noses, but this film and story doesn’t take place now, nor was the film made now.  It’s a strong story with incredible songs and it was a totally groundbreaking musical in just about every way.  Irene Dunne is the heart and soul of the film and she could not be better.  When she breaks into her shuffle dance during Can’t Help Lovin’ That Man of Mine, well, I was smiling so big I thought my face would crack.  Paul Robeson is magical, and his Old Man River is brilliant and it’s brilliantly filmed.  And I love Hattie McDaniel as Queenie.  Allan Jones is a fine Gaylord Ravenel, and Helen Morgan is heartbreaking as Julie.  But everyone is perfect for their roles and I just loved it all over again (I’ve actually only seen it twice before this).  It is miles better than the MGM color remake.  And the transfer?  Absolutely fantastic and stellar and completely amazing.  That, dear readers, is what we call a rave.  Not a quasi-rave, but a full-on rave.

I then watched a little of Peyton Place, but I must say I just have never really cared for it.  I’ll try to finish watching it, but for me it’s a bit of a slog.  It looks good and I do like all the actors, the director, and the screenwriter, and the Franz Waxman score is gorgeous.

Then I had my sandwich, which was excellent, I listened to some music, and then started watching the NT Live production of One Man, Two Guvnors, starring James Cordon.  Like most farces, it gets off to a slow start as we’re given a lot of information, and I thought the first scene was not well directed, but with scene two everything clicks into place and it has some very funny moments.  It’s no classic farce, at least not so far (I’m an hour in) and I really don’t like the musical interludes between scenes but I guess that’s one way of covering the set changes.  Cordon gives it everything he’s got and he’s great.  The audience bits are planned, of course – only the first one is with real audience members, the second two are plants.  I’ll finish it after I post these here notes.

Today, I’ll be up when I’m up, I’ll do what I do, I won’t go to the mail place, I’m thinking a quick trip to McDonald’s as my beloved Filet o fish sandwich is only two bucks on Fridays and they now have this new item called a Little Mac, which is a Big Mac with one patty and not middle piece of bread.  Oh, wait, this is Saturday, not Friday.  I should have done that yesterday.  I swear, I have no idea what the days are anymore and that is simply pathetic.  No, wait, it IS Friday.  I gotta tell you, I am firmly in Stuporland and am its finest citizen. Then I’ll watch, listen, and whatever.

Tomorrow will obviously hold no surprises.  I’ll go to the mail place for sure, I’ll probably make Wacky Noodles unless I make tuna pasta salad, which would last through Sunday.  Oh, speaking of Sunday, since that’s when we should have been doing the Kritzerland show, I’m going to do a Best of Kritzerland, picking fifteen or twenty of my favorite numbers from the time when we first occasionally started taping stuff, which wasn’t until two years in.  So, I’ll be figuring out that list tomorrow, too.

Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, get up when I get up, do what I do, eat, watch, and listen.  Today’s topic of discussion: It’s FRIDAY – what is currently in your CD player, and your DVD/Blu and Ray player?  I’ll start – CD, many things.  Blu-ray, Peyton Place.  Your turn.  Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I hit the road to dreamland, hoping my quasi-stupor doesn’t turn into a full-fledged stupor and reveal my secret identity as Stuporman from Stuporland.

Search BK's Notes Archive:
 
© 2001 - 2020 by Bruce Kimmel. All Rights Reserved