Well, dear readers, I’m now older and wiser, not necessarily in that order, and I had a very nice, relaxing birthday – alone, naturally, in this wacky time – but had wonderful e-mails and texts and telephonic calls and wonderful wishes on the Facebook, around 700 of ‘em, I think. Birthdays are the best thing about Facebook. Otherwise, I’m sitting here like so much fish, listening to the Richard Strauss opera, Elektra, second time through. I don’t care for it as much as Salome, which is grand fun – this one seems like endless recitative without any big tunes, which I suppose suits the story – it’s under two hours, so that’s good, and I do love Strauss’s orchestrations. The cast certainly gives it their all, especially Birgit Nilsson and Regina Resnick. And it sounds fine on one of those Decca Soundstage discs. Not one I’ll revisit that often, but I’m glad to have heard it. Thus spake me, which was the original title of Strauss’s Thus Spake Zarathustra, whoever the HELL Zarathustra was. I wonder if anyone has ever named their child Zarathustra, just so that when they uttered their first word the parent could proudly proclaim, thus spake Zarathustra. Yes, those are the thoughts that are going around like a circle in a spiral in the windmills of my mind.
Yesterday was a fine day. I got seven hours of sleep, got up, answered e-mails and texts, liked the first 400 birthday wishes, and was surprised that the package of pizzas hadn’t arrived. The Darling Daughter had also informed me that she had a package coming here to the home environment. I did some work on project two, heard a new orchestration, which was lovely, and then I moseyed on over to the mail place and picked up a couple of little packages. I came right home. At around three, I began to wonder if I should rethink the meal plan, but thankfully the box o’ pizzas arrived not soon thereafter. I put three of them in the freezer, pre-heated the oven to 400, and once it achieved that heat in went the pizza and six minutes later out came the pizza, perfectly done. I used the pizza cutter to cut the pizza, which is a good thing to do with a pizza cutter. These are ten-inch pizzas, and while you can cut them into six slices, they are very small slices. The pepperoni pizza was just great and just what I felt like (the other three, this time around, are meat ball, sausage, and plain cheese), and I ate it all up.
Then I did some more work on project two (it was a pretty good project two day, actually), then the Darling Daughter’s package arrived – called Birthday in a Box – balloons, streamers, a candle for a cake, a Mad Libs card, a pointy party hat, and a box of dark chocolate-covered cherries, which I love and haven’t had in years. It was very sweet. Then I decided I needed to have some sort of cake – what would a birthday be without some sort of cake – so I moseyed on over to Gelson’s. The bakery there has little bite-sized cake things, so I got one coconut and one strawberry shortcake, probably the equivalent of one nice-sized slice of cake. I came home and ate the strawberry shortcake one, then sat on my couch like so much fish.
Last night, I watched a Blu and Ray of the Royal Opera at Covent Garden 2007 production of Hansel and Gretel. I shouldn’t have, but I did. I could have shut it off but it was such a train wreck that I had to endure it to the bitter end. Of course, over on Amazon there are multiple five-star reviews (along with a couple of one-star reviews), people pontificating how brilliant it was. It was not only not brilliant, it was actively rancid, like a fetid wart.
It just boggles my mind that anyone would give this travesty a five-star review for ANY reason. The sets were ridiculous. On the reveal of the first set I knew what I was in for. It felt like Sweeney Todd and Hannibal Lecter Meets Hansel and Gretel, and the “directors”, whose “vision” this apparently was, should have never been allowed near this wonderful entertainment.
Whether it’s the fake bare boobs on the witch (really?) or the dead, hanging children in the meat locker (really?), or the gleaming white modern kitchen, or the Sweeney Todd ovens, or the amount of food these poor singers are forced to eat while trying to sing, or the miniature witch’s house, or the witch’s aluminum walker, or the Schreck moment with the fake legs and feet, or the Dew Fairy carrying what looked like a bottle of Windex – I mean, it was literally a non-stop barrage of awfulness. This is actually worse than the horrid Peter Jones production, I unfortunately saw a few minutes of.
I am so not interested in directors with a “vision” that robs wonderful works like this of their magic, just to satisfy their pseudo-intellectual, bereft of talent egos. This is an opera for CHILDREN. It’s fine if the scary bits are fun – fun scary bits are always fun and kids like them – fake exposed boobs? Not so much. Hanging dead children? Exile these directors to Siberia. Not having it. As old-fashioned as the Met production taped in the early 1980s was (it’s not that well directed either), it trusts the material – what a concept. And therefore, the audience is delighted with it from start to finish. The final image in this crap production says it all – no joy, enigmatic, and it carries right through to the curtain call. Oh, and the costumes – the alive-again kids at the end all in their Goonies clothes – Hansel and Gretel, I have no idea what the HELL they were wearing or what time period they’re in – and then there’s mom and pop, with her loosening pop’s belt and undoing her dress so they can settle down for some good old-fashioned sex since the kids aren’t around. I’m not making any of this up, dear readers. And despite the audience looking as if they’d been assaulted, still they make with the bravos.
None of it is the fault of the cast – the two leading ladies are fine – not as young-looking or appealing as von Stade and Blegen in the Met, but they sing fine, as does mom and pop and the witch, although it’s really hard to get past the droopy exposed fake boobs with their huge nipples. As to Mr. Colin Davis, the conductor – never liked him, never been a fan, he looks dour while conduction – no energy, no fun, no nothing. And the band, sorry to say, despite the huzzahs from the usual suspects on Amazon, are not so great and they’re not helped by an awful mix. It’s reprehensible, and pity the poor cast having to endure these amateur directors. And just in case I haven’t been completely clear here, this is highly NOT recommended by the likes of me.
It actually came in a three-pack, the other two Blu-rays being Janacek’s The Cunning Little Vixen, which looks like it might just be fun, and an opera of Pinocchio by Jonathan Dove, who I’ve never heard of.
After enduring the awfulness of that Blu-ray, I needed to cleanse my palate, so I had the coconut cake – before eating it, I lit the candle that was in the Birthday in a Box box and put it in the cake, made a wish, and blew out the candle in one breath, so I do hope my wish comes true. The coconut cake thing was excellent. Here is an actual photograph of it.
Isn’t that a lovely little coconut cake thing with a candle? After that, I relaxed and listened to music and am now halfway through my second listen of Elektra.
Today, I’ll be up when I’m up, I’ll do whatever needs doing, I’ll hopefully pick up some packages, I’ll eat (perhaps the meatball pizza), I’ll work on project two and the Kritzerland show, and then, at some point, I’ll watch, listen, and relax.
The rest of the week is more of the same, then on Saturday our little Group Rep Christmas playlet begins airing (for those that attend opening night, there’s a Zoom after-party, so that might be fun for folks), and then Sunday is our Kritzerland show and we do hope all you lovely dear readers and lurkers will watch it when it goes live on Facebook and YouTube Live because we love a big crowd and really love the comments.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, be up when I’m up, do whatever needs doing, hopefully pick up packages, eat, work on project two and the Kritzerland show, and then watch, listen, and relax. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s Ask BK Day, the day in which can ask me or any dear reader any old question you like and we get to give any old answer we like. So, let’s have loads of lovely questions and loads of lovely answers and loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I hit the road to dreamland, happy to have had a perfectly lovely birthday and to be older and wiser.