Well, dear readers, the gorgeous California weather continues unabated. Each day is more beautiful than the last. Clear blue skies, and if I didn't know it was February I'd swear it was July. Conversely, if I knew it was July I'd swear it was February, because I do like to be contrary, just like my close personal friend, Mary. Mary is always contrary and, for some reason, she is always out in her stupid garden. She's very secretive about her garden, though, and she will never tell me how her Secret Garden grows. Damn her eyes from here to Chicago - the city, not the musical. Not even one paragraph in and these notes are already sinking into a morass of nothingness.

And just what is the word "ass" doing in "morass"? It's so rude. Couldn't it be "morbutt" or "morrearend"? That would be ever so much more gentile. And just how did gentiles get into this? What do gentiles have to do with "morass"? I have always found that gentiles have "lessass" but that is another story altogether. Don't mind me, I'm just sitting here like so much fish, typing away, sinking into a morbutt of nothingness.

I know you'll all be happy to hear that I only lost three dollars at poker last night, not bad for an evening's entertainment. I also attended a rehearsal for our Tourette's Syndrome benefit, with the sultry Sally Kellerman, who is going to be wonderful, singing the Julius and Cissy Wechter song, Warm. I then saw a roughcut of the first thirty-eight minutes of the Nudie Musical documentary. How was it, you might ask, and I might tell you but before I do, isn't it time we all clicked on that Unseemly Button below before we all sink into a morass of nothingness?

Just in the nick or edward of time. Speaking of Nick, my pal Nick Redman showed me his rough cut of the first thirty-eight minutes of the Nudie Musical documentary. This sounds very familiar. Didn't I just say this elsewhere? Am I slipping into a mortucous of nothingness without even being aware of said slipping? We now have a handy-dandy title for the documentary. It's called, "From Dollars to Donuts: The Undressing of The First Nudie Musical." The documentary will run close to an hour, and if the first thirty-eight minutes are anything to go by, it's going to be terrific. I was very pleased with what I saw, and Nick is doing a great job with it. It just flies by, and it's pretty funny, too. It is sometimes shocking when he goes from film footage to actual person, because twenty-seven years does occasionally change the way people look. I wish I'd looked at the monitor, for example, when my interview was being shot, because if I had looked at the monitor I would have placed the interviewer on the other side of the camera, my better side these days. Still and all, I don't look too hideous, so there's that to be thankful for. I'll be seeing the rest mid-next week and of course will have a full report for you. The other fun thing we're doing for the documentary is having an original score (based on the music from my songs), arranged and played by the great Grant Geissman. I think this may be a first, DVD documentary-wise, having an original music score - usually they just use the musical score from the actual film. The Special Edition DVD will include the soundtrack CD, and I've decided to also include Grant's score for the documentary as well, as the actual soundtrack is only twenty-seven minutes long, and Grant's arrangements are so much fun.

Well, you know what today is. Today is Unseemly Trivia Contest day. And before we totally sink into a morass of nothingness, we just better get the trivia question out of the way. Remember, you have until midnight Monday to submit your answers - don't post them on the site, simply e-mail them to me at bruce@haineshisway.com or by clicking the handy-dandy "Ask Bruce" button. And now, this week's trivia question:

What Tony Award-winning performer also spent many years doing another award-winning job? Name the performer, the show they won a Tony for, and the non-theater related job. Good luck to one and all and also all and one.

Tonight I'm going to the Pasadena Playhouse to see Mr. Paul Lazurus' production of Mr. Neil Simon's Biloxi Blues. I've never seen play or film, so I'm looking forward to it.

Has anyone noticed that we are sinking into a morass of nothingness? I guess writing The Story has really been taking it out of me. Frankly, I like "it" in me, so I'm a bit annoyed with The Story for taking "it" out of me. Just what are "The Story" and "it" doing? Are they having a dalliance? Are they having a thing, a fling, doing something with zing? Oh, well, "it" always comes back in the end, so I do have the last laugh, it-wise.

I no longer have any clue as to what the hell I'm talking about. I feel it would be best to just stop writing right here and right now because I simply have nothing else to write about at this time on account of The Story taking it out of me. I'm empty inside and must eat some Rice Pudding and then do the Rice Pudding dance. Today's topic of discussion: Name your favorite song from a flop musical. As those who have listened to my Unsung Musicals albums know, I'm very fond of songs from flop musicals. Certainly at the top of my list would have to be Mr. Hamlisch and Mr. Ashman's Disneyland, from Smile. Post your thoughts in the Unseemly Comment Box below. Don't be shy - meet a Guy - pull up a chair. The air is humming - and someting great is coming.