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06/10/2002:
"THE PHOENIX RISING"

Photo of Bruce Kimmel

bk's notes II

Well, dear readers, it is a bright and sunny Monday morning and I have risen like a Phoenix to greet the world. Actually I don’t know how a Phoenix rises, but I liked the way it sounded. Do any of you know who a Phoenix rises? If so, do you know how a Tempe rises? Do only cities in Arizona rise? And isn’t there something about ashes? In any case, it is a bright and sunny Monday and I have risen like a Phoenix to greet the day.

Last night I dreamed I was at Manderley.

I had very disturbing dreams last night. I don’t even want to write about them because they involved people and things I cannot stomach. Not only can I not stomach them, I can’t feet them, I can’t arm them, and I can’t throat them. So, I will not be writing about my dreams from last night, because frankly or even stevely, I cannot stomach or any other body part the people and things said dreams were about.

Last night I watched the motion picture entitled The Verdict. I hadn’t seen it since it came out and I had very little memory of its plot. What a fine film The Verdict is. The type of film they no longer seem to be able to make. A non-hyped courtroom drama, subtle and well-crafted, with not one overt show-off cinematic moment. Just a beautifully written (David Mamet) and directed (Sidney Lumet) film. It was up for several Oscars and lost them all. The most disgusting loss was Mr. Paul Newman to Mr. Ben Kingsley in that ponderous piece of plastic known as Gandhi. Watching Mr. Newman in this film is a two-hour lesson in what great screen acting is all about. In fact, watching everyone in this film is a lesson in what great screen acting is all about. The marvelous cast also includes Jack Warden, Charlotte Rampling, Edward Binns, Lindsay Crouse, Roxanne Hart, and the always great James Mason. The judge is played by Milo O’Shea, and he’s so good that you want to just throw a squishy vegetable at him. The other truly wonderful performance in the film, albeit a brief one, is by the very underrated actor, Wesley Addy, as one of the doctors on trial. Addy was always terrific, and never finer than in this film and in John Frankenheimer’s Seconds. For you musical theater mavens, Mr. Addy was also married to Miss Celeste Holm. What I really like about this film is that despite evil machinations by the opposing side, despite witnesses being bought, despite all the money in the world, despite abuse of the judicial system, justice can prevail. I recommend this to one and all and also all and one. The enhanced transfer is excellent and really shows off the understated but great cinematography of Andrzej Bartkowiak. The score is by Johnny Mandel and it’s terrific, very sparse and spare and just perfect. If this film were made today, every dramatic point would be underlined by loud music, there would be pop songs coming out of the juke box in the bar, every door closing would sound thunderous, the camera would be doing Steadicam dances, and the actors would all be trying to win Academy Awards. It’s just really hard to believe that in twenty years time movie making, just classic simple movie making has degenerated like it has.

What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? Well, like the Phoenix, I have risen and being that that is the case, isn’t it time to click on the Unseemly Button below? Yes, I do believe it is time to click on the Unseemly Button below because I have said what I have to say in this section and I can say no more. When one has said all they can say in a section it is time to click on any Unseemly Button in sight or, in the case of haineshisway.com, in site.

Yesterday I promised to print the lovely Meltz and Ernest song, Sunday in My Shorts if the demand was high, and because the demand was high I shall indeed print the song and I shall print it right here and now and also right now and here, for your mental delectation.

SUNDAY IN MY SHORTS Music by Hinky Meltz Lyrics by Ernest Ernest

Sunday in my shorts
My, I look so cute.
Monday through Friday days are dreary
When I have to wear a suit.
But Sunday is the one day when my shorts come into play
’Cause Sunday is a fun day when I feel so glib and gay

Sunday in my shorts
Showin’ off my gams.
During the week is dull potatoes
But my Sundays are like yams.
For Sunday is the one day I’m relaxed and fancy-free
’Cause Sunday is a fun day when it’s just my shorts and me.

When I’m parading in my shorts
Everyone stops and turns and stares.
But I don’t mind, in fact I’m flattered
Saturday I might be upset – but Sunday I just say “Who cares?”

Sunday in my shorts,
And I’m lookin’ swell.
During the week I’ve got to dress up
Sundays those clothes can go to hell.
‘Cause Sunday is the one day I can dress the way I choose
Yes, Sunday is the fun day when my shorts and I can cruise
Wearing my shorts
Feeling unique
When you’re in shorts
You still can feel chic
And Sunday in my shorts is my favorite day of the week!

Isn’t that a bouncy song? It’s so positive and sunny and yet with an underlying current of worldly angst.

Don’t forget, you still have until midnight tonight to get me your guesses for our Unseemly Trivia Contest. And Donald has a brand spanking new radio show up and running. I have no clue as to what the theme of that radio show is, so perhaps Mr. Donald Feltham would like to enlighten us all.

Well, dear readers, like the Phoenix I have risen to greet the day. I suggest that if you haven’t risen like the Phoenix or the city of your choice, you simply must, it is simply too too. Tomorrow perhaps I shall rise like Pomona. Today’s topic of discussion: One of our dear readers suggested this topic and I thought it would be fun – how did you first discover Guy Haines, this site or my notes, in other words how did you come to be a regular denizen of haineshisway.com? And what was the first CD you purchased that I produced? Post away, my pretties, for I am very anxious to find out the what, where and why.

- Bruce Kimmel



Replies: 58 Unseemly Comments


Well, dear writer Bruce - it was you, yourself that sent me a lovely email announcing your new site. My first memory of hearing about Guy Haines was easily over 18 years ago, but it wasn't until quite a few years later that I knew he could SING! As for my first Kimmel produced CD, I would have to go back and check, as there are so many and I own so many of them.

Posted by Craig @ 06/10/2002 10:12 AM PST


My, my. Another day. Another week.
When did I discover Guy Haines? On the Sondheim Album, which a friend bought for me for my fifteenth birthday simply because she knew I liked Sondheim. And there was the lovely Guy Haines singing What Can You Loose?

I believe that the Sondheim Album was my first Bruce, but it might have been Merrily We Roll Along...

In any case, I first discovered the real a, which led me to Bruce, which led me here.

And oh, what a happy girl I am.

;)

Posted by Lolita @ 06/10/2002 10:14 AM PST


I had heard Guy Haines on a couple of CDs and was aware of our Mr. BK but didn't discover the phenomenon that IS Guy Haines until I happened over to the Fynsworth Alley Web site and heard the old BRH interview w/Mr. Haines and Mr. Feltham and Mr. Kimmel. Looking for ever more information and pleasure to stuff into my already full brain, I searched on Google for Guy Haines and Bruce Kimmel and found my way to Haines His Way and I've been hooked ever since. As far as the first BK produced CD, I am not home right now, most of my postings happen at my office computer so I can't look at my CD collection to determine which was first, but my last purchase, which was last week, was the Randy Graff CD. I know that I have many Mr. BK CDs but I'll have to get back to you as to which one was one of the first

Posted by Ben @ 06/10/2002 10:21 AM PST


the title of this week's radio show is "Jeanmaire, Christine, Daisy Mae & Two Gentlemen of Verona" -- and that's all I'm gonna say

Posted by Donald @ 06/10/2002 10:36 AM PST


The first BK I purchased was an LP, not a CD. It was THE FIRST NUDIE MUSICAL soundtrack and I look forward to finally getting it on CD with my DVD. This was one of my favorite films of the 70s. I was working for a time at a halfway house for people with minor mental problems, and they used to show them VHS movies to pass the time. One day I brought in FNM. Not only did they love it, but I never heard some of the social workers laugh as much. As for CDs, I bought the Bay Cities reissue of FORUM and their ANASTASIA AFFAIR, and then just about everything BK did on V-S, particularly the compolations.

Posted by William E. Lurie @ 06/10/2002 11:03 AM PST


Needless to say, I followed the adventures of BK and Mr. Guy Haines directly from another web site, which shall remain nameless. As for my first Kimmel-produced CD, it was either Unsung Sondheim or Debbie Gravitte's Part of Your World, both of which remain sheer magic to listen to.

But my first BK album was, of course, the musical Stages though I cannot say what I actually did with the LP. (I can't imagine that I would keep Ethel Merman's Disco Album and not Stages.)

Posted by Phil Crosby @ 06/10/2002 11:53 AM PST


The first cd that I purchased was "The World of Bruce Kimmel" which included the "First Nudie" soundtrack. Several months ago I wondered if my favorite movie "The First Nudie Musical" would ever come out on DVD. I looked it up on IMDB.com and there was some mention of a Guy Haines. I looked up the Haines His Way album and saw that it contained "Chinese Food in Bed" so I knew it had to be BK. I found this site and wrote to BK, who immediately scolded me for not reading the notes everyday. Now I don't miss one!

Posted by Mattso @ 06/10/2002 11:55 AM PST


I would say that my first Kimmel production was one of the Lost in Bostons or Unsung Musicals, but, you know what--I keep finding CDs in my collection that I had forgotten, or indeed never realized, were produced by our illustrious BK. For example, until Bruce reminded me, I had completely forgotten about his Bay Cities years, and I've had those CDs for ages. It was another show tune freak up here in Portland who pointed out to me how Mr. Haines always hides his face in pics, and we started to guess the rest.

I can clearly recall when I first made "real" contact with Bruce, though--he inadvertently posted what was supposed to be a private message (to, I believe, one of the creators of "Summer of '42") on RATM, complete with his real name. I, of course, wasted no time in emailing him and the rest, as they say, is history (still being written, and isn't that too too?).

In my ongoing attempt to create my own version of Six Degrees, and vis a vis Girl in Pink Tights--you can search the archives for Shepard Traube (Girl's producer/director) for some semi-fascinating information. And, just to prove to you all (as if you didn't know already) that Usenet can be dangerous, some Associate Editor of American Atheist magazine (yes, evidently, there is such a publication) found a years-old post of mine on RecArtsPastFilms about my favorite golden era actress and is now pestering me to provide source material for an article he's writing. What a tangled web we weave when first we post on Usenet to relieve (that's my new handy dandy aphorism for the day).

Posted by JMK @ 06/10/2002 12:02 PM PST


Well, I was a loyal reader of
the Real A, then I rediscovered
Bruce's writings at that other
website for that other record
company. When those things
that happen happened at that
site, I did a websearch for
Bruce, and found this lovely
little site, only a week or so
after it started up.

As for my first BK CD, it was
Merrily We Roll Along, well
before I knew who the hell this
Bruce Kimmel fellow was.

Posted by Jed @ 06/10/2002 12:07 PM PST


Upon press reports of what has come to be known as "the story" I sent Mr. BK a note entitled "fight, fight, fight!" Upon which Mr. BK thanked me for my kind words of support and invited me to this site, where I have lurked from day one. Dare I say posting is more fun than merely lurking?

I'm not sure what the first instance was that I became aware of Mr. Guy Haines - other than noticing a peculiar photo on a liner note, thinking that rather odd, and then reminiscing about those goofy "no photo available" shots that always showed up in the high school yearbook.

The first BK disc I purchased, I believe, was the Cinderella compilation, with it's marvelous hidden track. The tale of my first hidden track experience: I was in the car, and minutes of quiet had passed. I was paused at a stoplight, and begin to take a sip of Coke, when the hidden track blasts forth, along with it a mouthful of beverage. Moral of the story: hidden tracks and high volume do not make for a tidy car.

Many BK produced volumes followed Cinderella into my collection. In fact, I just added another one last week: The Grass Harp.

Posted by Scott R @ 06/10/2002 12:17 PM PST


OK, I get the message. I didn't know but now I know and I won't say those two words anymore. Especially around here. It will be like saying "The Scottish Play" instead of *** :-)

Posted by Ben @ 06/10/2002 12:20 PM PST


BK -

Let's see - with 500+ show CD's on the shelves, remembering the first BK disc is tricky. But the first I overtly remember are the "Unsung" and "Lost in Boston" discs (although I have most of the Bay Cities, and many other VS releases as well).

Re Mssr Haines - read about him "in depth" in Show Music, then got to discuss him with Mara during your Brand F days.

Also had the pleasure of meeting you and David Levy when I stopped by your offices during my vacation in Lala land last summer. You were very hospitable (especially to my then 9 year old son) and the tour of the workplace, plus conversations with you and David were very enjoyable (and informative).

Read some postings last night re Nancy LaMott. Tried to find a contact for David Friedman but no luck. Do you have one, or is there any way you could intevene and get this off TDC?

Posted by Phil @ 06/10/2002 12:38 PM PST


I don't actually remember how all these things started, but after all, I am more advanced in years than Bruce, so I seem to be losing megabytes of memory daily.

I did discover The Real A first and fell in love (platonically speaking) with Bruce's alternate pithiness and incoherence.

My first Kimmel-produced album eludes me, as I must have had several before I started noticing that name on all of them.

I first noticed Guy Haines when I realized that the man never seems to show his face. And he didn't sound like Michael Crawford doing Phantom.

And I believe it was the tooth fairy who whisper into my ear "www.haineshisway.com has arisen." Heck, I don't know.

I'm just glad that this site has lured me away from more frivolous web pages like freerepublic.com (a guilty and masochistic pleasure) and eroticjellomolds.com. I may feel guilty spending so much time here, but at least I can rationalize it.

So I say, Here's to Bruce Kimmel and www.haineshisway.com!! Long may they wave!

Posted by William F. Orr @ 06/10/2002 12:43 PM PST


I was made aware of Bruce Kimmel through exposure to his name on filmus-l, a discussion group on film music.

Then I "commented" on something he posted to that group which led to a sparse communication.

Then, one day last March, I had posted something on r.m.m. about the last Oscar-cast that caused a tempestuous soul to jump to an outrageously silly conclusion, and Bruce jumped in and said some nice things. He suggested everybody might try haineshisway.com without sounding like he was proselytizing. I don't know how many actually followed (and may yet be lurking) but I'm not one for being shy. You miss out on too much that way.

As for Phoenixes rising, they normally do it from a ball of flames. The Greek 20-drachma piece used to (and may still) have the classical image of the phoenix rising from flames...it was a symbol of the new Greece (Hellas).

As to whether only cities in Arizona may rise, that may be a risible question! Many cities have risen to one occasion or another, most of othem outside of Arizona. New York springs to mind!

Now I am terribly confused over this "Guy Haines" conundrum. I know he was a character in a movie...but is there a real Guy Haines? Is it someone other than Bruce Kimmel? And is "Bruce Kimmel" NOT Bruce Kimmel's real name?

My first Bruce Kimmel-produced CD HAS to have been "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" on Bay Cities. Does that count, BK, or need it be something you created from scratch?

I've just listened to the original soundtrack recording of "Bells Are Ringing" and the sound is phenomenal, as are the performances and this just has to be one of my favorite movie musical soundtracks ever. It cheers me right up, it thrills me, it saddens me and then it elates me. WHAT A RIDE! Available on DRG!

Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 06/10/2002 01:08 PM PST


Craig, it seems Meltz & Ernest found no George in the shorts. I hope that means it is safe for the coprophilia-phobic.

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 01:24 PM PST


If a "coprophiliac" is a person who loves "sxxt," would a "copraphiliac" be a person who loves coconut?

Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 06/10/2002 01:47 PM PST


Freedunit:
I see that -- I guess they didn't want George to REAR his way into the song, Butt seriously, it's a darn good song nonetheless (one of those 3 for 1 words!)

Posted by Craig @ 06/10/2002 01:50 PM PST


I first discovered Guy Haines quite a long time ago, but, of course, that was after his discoverer, bk, discovered him. I will have to check to see if I can figure out exactly when it was. It must have been circa Varèse Sarabande…

Since it is Monday and not Wednesday…
Mister Pulliam, Guy Gaines Haines is stranger on a train than on CD. Bruce Stewart Kimmel was established previously as real, and Guy Haines is Guy Haines and looks nothing like Bruce Kimmel

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 01:50 PM PST


I am trying to keep things moving 4wards, and 3-for-1 words are a good start.

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 01:52 PM PST


A coprophiliac is one who loves sxyt, not sxxt. I know. You’re probably thinking, Who gives a sxyt?

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 01:54 PM PST


Scott:

Why thank you. My Joe is out doing yard work while I'm up here doing paper work with the stereo loud and the windows open. I just put on the hidden track to Cinderella, and he cracked up. Since he is taking a chain saw to dead tree limbs, that sort of music could be dangerous.

And in case anyone is wondering, I have it on very good authority that Bruce Kimmel is entirely fictional. He is just a fictional persona concocted by Mr. Guy Haines and Mr. Mark Bakalor as a part of their devious scheme to rule the world!

Posted by William F. Orr @ 06/10/2002 02:11 PM PST


Since it is Monday and not Wednesday…
WFO, Bruce Stewart Kimmel is real, and Guy Haines is Guy Haines and looks nothing like Bruce Kimmel. I believe Guy Haines sings and does not concoct.

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 02:15 PM PST


How enjoyable it is to read all your lovely posts about ME. That has made a sunny day sunnier. Mr. Ron Pulliam should check out the Haines photo gallery on the left of our handy-dandy home page, for the complete history of the Haines clan.

Posted by bk @ 06/10/2002 02:36 PM PST


freedunit:

That's what they want you to think. But the reality is somewhat less than it would seem.

Have you checked out the unreleased album Guy Haines, His Other Way: Guy Haines Concocts?

It is quite clear that Guy Haines is real, because his voice has been registered many times. On the other hand, this Bruce Stewart Kimmel, has anyone ever seen them together? Aha!

Now you will say something about having seen this supposed Kimmel character in movies and television shows. But you forget about digitalization.

"But digitalization is a new technology," I hear you protest. Well, that's what they want you to think. But it was actually back-engineered from alien technology by Mr. Mark Bakalor decades ago as part of his devious scheme to rule the world.

Fortunately, he avoided killing his grandfather when he went back to invent it.

And that, as they say, is that.

Posted by William F. Orr @ 06/10/2002 03:17 PM PST


Since it is Monday and not Wednesday…
WFO, Bruce Stewart Kimmel is real, and Guy Haines is Guy Haines and looks nothing like Bruce Kimmel. Of course, Guy Haines is real; he sings and records, even if he does not know from songs. As we have learned, Bruce knows from songs. Therefore, Bruce picks the best songs for Guy. I believe that Greymatter and Microsoft are the closest to alien technology that Mister Mark Bakalor has come. Please do not tug at the space-time continuum; it could tear.

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 03:28 PM PST


Thanks, everyone.

It's all perfectly muddied now.

Thanks, BK: The photo gallery is as innocuously vague as ever regarding Guy Haines..

Thanks for the links, Freedunit! They led me down a merry path toward obfuscation, as intended.

It's a cabal, I tell you...a CABAL!

Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 06/10/2002 03:44 PM PST


Ron,
Don't you worry. It is all a ruse. An obtuse Ruse. All I know is that the Bruce Kimmel that sang "Chinese Food in Bed" on The Music of Bruce Kimmel sounds remarkably like Guy Haines singing "Chinese Food in Bed" on Haines His Way.

Incidentally, neither of them sound or look like Julie Andrews singing "Tiptoe through the Tulips" on her rare album entitled What was I Thinking. Hope that helps.

Posted by Mattso @ 06/10/2002 03:54 PM PST


Well, I just took a photo of myself using the handy-dandy auto timer, and I was definitely in the photo and therefore I believe I am real. Otherwise, there was an uncouth interloper pretending to be me, and I think we all know how we feel about uncouth interlopers, now don't we?

Posted by bk @ 06/10/2002 03:55 PM PST


I've known about Guy Haines for so long, I can't remember a time pre-Guy Haines (or, if you're a Hellenist, ante-Guy Haines -- which is a completely different thing than anti-Guy Haines). However, my first bk produced cd was the very lovely "Kander and Ebb Album" with Brent Barrett on it. My latest was the most lovely "Little Me" with my great good friend Martin Short on it (well, I don't ACTUALLY know him, but we come from the same city and he studied at the same university I'm at, so we're almost close personal friends).

Posted by Paul Fairie @ 06/10/2002 04:10 PM PST


An uncouth interloper would be unseemly, unlike a couth one. You may have to post that auto-timed photo for the conspiracy theorists.

Speaking of Cake…
I feel like chocolate cake. I am sure you are wondering why I do not feel like myself, but I feel like chocolate cake. Does anyone else? Kerry? By the way (BTW), Kerry, I should tell you I had a very good French-style chocolate cake in Arizona—in beautiful Tucson, which is spelled TUK-sun—well “Tucson,” actually—but is pronounced TOO-sahn, to take a pedantic, pointless excursion from the pointful point. I still feel like chocolate cake…

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 04:17 PM PST


Could someone please explain to my why Martin Short is considered to be "funny"?

Perhaps his not-so-close personal friend could take a stab at it?

I'm still trying to figure out why the Comedy Channel thought the idea of Jiminy Glick -- and Short's getting all done up in a fat suit -- was a good idea (indirectly making fun of folks who are glandularly challenged). I've watched many of those shows because of the guest stars...and can only surmise that Short is an "insiders" joke of some sort?

I've seen reactions of detached bemusement to what seemed to be disbelief at some of Short's comments.

I will say this: I thought him terribly amusing in "Father of the Bride" and the sequel. But, that's all there was to it! That's the only character he's created that made me laugh. He can't portray a prancing wedding coordinator his entire professional career (or can he?).

Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 06/10/2002 04:33 PM PST


I'm not sure which Kimmel CD I bought first. I began looking at them one day, and several Kimmel CDs were in my collection. And I noticed that my favorites were Kimmels.

Posted by Laura @ 06/10/2002 06:39 PM PST


Great topic, Bruce!

Once upon a time, I started noticing that all my favorite CD's had a burgundy spine with white lettering. When I couldn't find the CD's I wanted in stores, I searched the internet and found Varese Sarabande. I e-mailed the head of the cabaret department (or whatever they called it); this turned out to be Bruce. I told him how much I enjoyed the CD's and that I especially enjoyed Jason Graae and Guy Haines. I even suggested that Varese Sarabande release a solo CD of Mr. Haines. I did ask what they could possibly use for a cover photograph. This was before I knew just how close the friendship was between Mr. H. and Mr. K. Bruce kindly e-mailed back saying Mr. Haines would get a laugh out my suggestion, but his head might get swelled at the thought.

My first CD was "Broadway Christmas" --- which is still one of my favorites. I attempted to find "Hollywood Christmas" after seeing it on the VS website, so I e-mailed or phoned them. A very nice man told me the CD was out of print, but sent me one that he had left. I think he eventually referred me to that unnamed website when I inquired about other BK CD's.
I discovered that other site before the Sondheim CD was released and immediately pre-ordered it.
I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Being able to order ALL those CD's at a bargain price. BK's notes every Wednesday. Interviews, radio shows. I loved it and spent most of my salary there.

Then there was some vague mention of moving or changes to the site. And no more BK's notes. I worried.

Luckily I happened to have surfed across the Sondheim site and found a link to Guy Haines. And here I have been ever since. Bruce tries to get away from me, but he'll never get away from me (I feel a song coming on here). He may move on, but serendipity always seems to send me to him.

So, here we are: One big happy Haines family.

Posted by Kerry @ 06/10/2002 06:42 PM PST


freedunit,
Where in Tucson did you have that great cake? You know, I feel like cake, too. Maybe Angelfood today.

And yes, a Phoenix rose out of the ashes. Bruce, do you have any ashes you could rise from?

Posted by Kerry @ 06/10/2002 06:48 PM PST


Re: Martin Short.

I have no idea why, but I do adore the man... Though I'm not a huge fan of Jiminy Glick. I love Ed Grimely, but that's pretty much the only character of his that I know. I have experienced him on talk shows, mostly. His impressions are great, especially Katherine Hepburn.

Just thoughts ;)

Posted by Lolita @ 06/10/2002 07:10 PM PST


My first Kimmel Experience: the revival Merrily We Roll Along.
How did I find this site? I was referred by the uncouth interloper Mark Bakalor from the Sondheim.com site, having been a fan of "The Real A." And what a happy member of the Haines family I am now.
I have an idea: How about if Bruce interviews Guy Haines? or Mark Bakalor? or one of the dear readers? Like, oh just for example, myself? Thoughts?

Posted by Hapgood @ 06/10/2002 07:13 PM PST


I am not transported by the talents of Martin Short. In the right role, he can be terrific; in an ill-fitting role, much less than terrific. As a stand-up comic, he can be patience-trying. I enjoyed him best doing sketch comedy on SCTV. With the character of Jiminy Glick Short does not “indirectly mak[e] fun of folks who are glandularly challenged”; he very directly ridicules fat people and bases his humor on the stereotype of fat equaling slob. Although I have on occasion laughed at the sheer stupidity of Glick—a couple of times there was more than just fat + clumsy + stupid—by and large it is a character that does not work for me. Were Short a dexterous purveyor of grotesques, such a character might work. However, I find him lacking the elegance and eloquence of a practitioner of grotesquerie such as the astute and brilliant Barry Humphries.

Kerry, I am always in favor of chocolate cake, but I cannot recall often, if ever, being in favor of angel-food cake, although I do enjoy a good white cake or yellow cake. [Other colors are welcome for consideration, too.] The most excellent French-style bakery in Tucson is Le Delice Bakery & Deli. Yes, you read correctly: deli. I was put-off by the name at first, but then I discovered that the owners are a French couple who for thirty-five years owned and operated a bakery in Denver and recently retired to Tucson—where they run a bakery full-time! Anyone who has worked in a bakery or baked in any quantity knows what kind of a “retirement” that is. It would kill lesser mortals. I call the bakery “French-style,” because it is in Tucson, not France, but the patisserie is the real thing: no artificial ingredients—meaning no hydrogenated oils—all real, all the time. Everything I tasted there was delicious. The chocolate cake in question was the simply beautiful “Christopher,” a chocolate genoise with mousse and ganache. Excellent!

Le Delice Bakery & Deli is at 7245 East Tanque Verde Road at Sabino Canyon Road, Tucson, Arizona; 520-290-9714.

I can answer questions about Chicago and New York City bakeries, also. And I can cook, too! Er— I can bake, too!

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 07:32 PM PST


For the record—pun intended—I first discovered bk at Bay Cities; and Guy Haines later.

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 07:33 PM PST


Of course my very first Bruce Kimmel was the LP of Stages which I am looking at right now. I am looking up in the yellow pages where I can transfer it to CD.

I bought quite a number of Bay Cities releases. The ones that I could find if Canada. Then I move to the Varese Saranbande and the onto Fynsworth. I have all of the Kimmel produced vocals, all the albums like Lost in Boston with a few exceptions, The Saturday Night Live, The Hits of... and the Paul Simon covers. There are few of the cast albums I don't have. I admit I haven't bought any Fynsworth since Bruce left. Not sure what he produced and what he didn't.

They are beinging to look like a reissue label and releasing albums by some people I have never heard of. I wondering if this is taking on a Jerome Records air/

Posted by Michael Shayne @ 06/10/2002 07:36 PM PST


Dead Don John—gone, but not for Gotti.

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 08:12 PM PST


Oh, my dear, dear Bruce Stuart Kimmel San,

I have a confession to make. And I do hope you won't hate me afterwards.

You see, I did not know who you were or even Mr. Guy Gaines Haines San or Mr. Mark Mywords Bakalor San. No indeed, I didn't. Not until I was googling for my own name on the Internet, which I do weekly

Posted by Sushi Tomoto from Kyoto @ 06/10/2002 08:56 PM PST


Oh, my dear, dear Bruce Stuart Kimmel San,

I have a confession to make. And I do hope you won't hate me afterwards.

You see, I did not know who you were or even Mr. Guy Gaines Haines San or Mr. Mark Mywords Bakalor San. No indeed, I didn't. Not until I was googling for my own name on the Internet, which I do weekly on Mondays at 5:37 pm, and I came accross your very kind mention of me in your these here notes.

Knowing that you must be one of my myriads of fans, I, of course, wrote back, as I feel it is important to stay in touch with one's public.

Not that I have not always been passionately fond of the American musical theatre! Heaven forbid! I have indeed been in more than one Japanese production of your incredible repertoir of musical drama, and was even in one show in your very own country, about which I will tell you another time.

Well, since then you can believe that my secretary has been busy purchasing Bruce Kimmel San albums, and they play day and night in my home. And the staff has certainly been pleased! You can see them dancing around gleefully with their little feather dusters and those machines they use to suck up the dirt! Why, they haven't been so cheerful since I went on my Barry Manilow San binge in 1997! I have also laden my refrigerator with ham chunks and cheese slices in order to join you in your (frequent) cybernetic celebrations.

So you see, although I did not seek you out from absolute fannish obsession, we were brought together by fate, and I have learned to love you, my dear, dear Bruce Kimmel San.

Please do not be mad at your little Sushi... :-/

Posted by Sushi Tomoto from Kyoto @ 06/10/2002 08:59 PM PST


Sushi san, that would be Stewart sans u

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 09:13 PM PST


Oh, and thanks to Bruce (and Meltz and Ernest, of course) for such a delightful song. Just wish I could hear the bouncy, peppy melody that accompanies such fine lyrics.

Posted by Kerry @ 06/10/2002 10:05 PM PST


Can you hear it now?

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 10:05 PM PST


What about now?

Posted by freedunit @ 06/10/2002 10:06 PM PST


I guess I first took notice of Guy Haines (as fara as singling him out) was either "Evening Star" from "Lost in Boston" or "It Doesn't Matter Anymore" from "Prime Time Musicals." Two great versions of two great songs. They have been played over and over (I'm almost embarassed to think how mnany times I've played those two songs).
I probably bought the CD's at the same time and was entranced by those songs and the song stylings of Mr. Guy Haines.

Posted by Kerry @ 06/10/2002 10:11 PM PST


My typing has not gotten better, I see. I must have been distracted while writing my last post. It must be that bouncy peppy melody coming through my computer

Posted by Kerry @ 06/10/2002 10:13 PM PST


Some 10 hours or so later, I
realize that I neglected to tell of
my first Guy Haines
experience! How unseemly! It
was on one of the Lost in
Boston CDs, #2, I believe.

As for Martin Short, I'm with
you, Ron. I find him
horrendously unfunny most
often.

Posted by Jed @ 06/10/2002 10:16 PM PST


I also forgot to relate my first Guy Haines experience. It was on the CD "Cinderella," which I bought for Sandra to listen to while we were on a long driving vacation. I remember hearing his song and thinking, "Wow, who is that with the sexy voice?" I was quite disappointed that the photo hid his face. I hope some day to see the face that goes with the voice.

Posted by Laura @ 06/10/2002 10:58 PM PST


Ahhh...Mr. BK aka GH -

THE VERDICT is one of my favorite films. It ranks up there with my other favorites -- "Rear Window," "Vertigo," and "Giant" (to name but a few). As you said, everything about it is superb. I agree Paul Newman should have gotten the Academy Award (I remember rooting for him). Two of my favorite scenes in the film are when he goes to the hospital for the first time to see the comatose woman (all done in silence with no dialogue) -AND- in the courtroom at the end (all dialogue). As you said "a lesson in screen acting." And boy, do I feel his anger when he learns he's been betrayed (Hope I'm not giving anything away to those who haven't seen it). I was struck too by the cinematography. One image that sticks in my mind (if I remember it correctly) is where Paul Newman and another actor are talking as they walk down an inside stairway. The whole scene is shot from outside across the street through the building's glass wall.

Another film that I think is similar in nature to "The Verdict" is Francis Ford Coppola's "The Rainmaker" with Matt Damon, Jon Voight and Danny DeVito. It had all the same elements -- good acting, good villian, good script, good direction, good score, good cinematography, and justice. A wonderful surprise was seeing Teresa Wright in the role of Matt's landlady (wasn't she great in "The Best Years of Our Lives"). It's excellent films like these that make me s-w-o-o-o-o-o-n.

HOW I FOUND GUY HAINES: I was preparing the Cabaret West Calendar when Lisa Richard, a Cabaret West member, let us know that she was going to be on Donald's show to promote her new CD, "Virgin Tracks" (which coincidentally has an original Bruce Kimmel song on it). I "tuned in" and that's when I discovered Guy. As for the first Kimmel recording I purchased: I must confess, I never paid that much attention, but I do believe it was the cassette tape of "Lost in Boston."

BTB (Internet lingo for By the By): Will the real Guy Haines please stand up? He's either on this website or on http://www.guyhaines.com.

Posted by Donna - Cabaret West @ 06/11/2002 12:02 AM PST


Thought I saw Guy on a train once and then saw the back of his head many years later on the Unsung Musicals CD.(or maybe Lost In Boston) BK came to my notice at Bay City - My first copy of Forum (later stolen) and my extisting (not stolen) copy of A Doll's Life. I was a reader of the REAL A. When BK left that alley place (unspeakable) I eventually contacted Mr Mark B to find his whereabouts.
I did not enter the trivia quiz this week. Howdy Doody is virtually unknown in OZ. (never shown here on TV). Did hazard a guess at the friend of the horse but it was probably too obvious to be correct. I am nearly 12 hours later than usual in posting - I have to now work out if it is still yesterday in California or whether we are on the same day. It all becomes quite confusing.

Posted by Tom from OZ @ 06/11/2002 12:46 AM PST


I first encountered Guy Haines on a train.

Posted by Bruno @ 06/11/2002 06:15 AM PST


And what did you talk about, “Bruno”? Make any plans?

Posted by freedunit @ 06/11/2002 07:25 AM PST


OOPS! Incorrect link! Try this for the OTHER (real or not?) Guy Haines http://www.guyhaines.com

Posted by Donna - Cabaret West @ 06/11/2002 08:12 AM PST


I thought one of my legs -- if not both -- were being pulled by some conspiratorial something-or-other so I googled my way through Guy Haines and Lo! and Behold! There are those elusive albums by Kimmel and there's Haines and his album and....well, you folks obviously have years and years and YEARS of esoteric knowledge stowed away up with which I can never keep.

Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 06/11/2002 09:26 AM PST


See.. we were not "pulliam" your leg.. sorry. Had to.

Posted by Craig @ 06/11/2002 09:35 AM PST


The knowledge is freely and generally available, not esoteric.

Posted by freedunit @ 06/11/2002 11:30 AM PST





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