haines his way

08/20/2002:
"CLIMB EV'RY MOUNTAIN, FORD EV'RY STREAM"

Well, dear readers, as I write these here notes there is a problem with the form to which I cut and paste them to post on the site. I cannot access the form. Therefore, I cannot post the notes. I couldn’t even post a comment about it this morning because said comments go through that form address. Therefore, we are in limbo. Perhaps I shall do the Limbo whilst being in Limbo. Have you ever seen a fifty-four year old Jew do the Limbo? They don’t get up afterwards. Well, I sent an e-mail to the errant and truant Mr. Mark Bakalor, who has disappeared off the face of the earth, and also to his tech person. Hopefully they will have it all fixed and working in short order.
I appreciated all the posts of support yesterday, and of course we shall continue unabated. I do know that we are in the dog days of summer and that people are off doing things. But it’s been difficult to watch things slow like they have and I just wanted to make certain that all was well with the haineshisway.com world. We simply have too much fun here and the world needs all the fun places it can get, so damn them, damn them all to hell, we shall stay because there’s always a party going on at haineshisway.com. We shall once again be the most popular site on all the Internet because we shall climb ev’ry mountain and ford every stream. We’ll even Chevy ev’ry stream, and here at haineshisway.com you’ll never walk alone because no one is alone and one is the loneliest number and we are two for the seesaw not one, you gotta have two for the seesaw and seesaws go up, down, up down, and I believe with ev’ry drop of rain that falls a flower grows, we are a brotherhood of man, and we shall be together, wherever we go.
My, that was so inspirational I think I shall have to eat a Ritz cracker. I have now left a rather terse message on Mr. Bakalor’s cell phone, which he, of course, is not answering because he is a lazy loafer who sleeps until noon and eats figs in bed. No, not even figs… raisins… ah, liaisons. What the hell am I talking about?
I’m going to check with some folks, but I do think I shall perhaps make an announcement, an exciting announcement, by the end of the week, if it’s okay with said folks. If it’s not okay with said folks, then I shan’t make an exciting announcement by the end of the week.
Wasn’t that a totally useless paragraph? It has been pointed out to me that I have not provided the address of the book reading and signing for Saturday, so here it is: Bookfellows 238 N. Brand Blvd. Glendale CA 91203. Take the Brand exit off the 134, go south a half-mile and there you are (it’s just north of the historic Alex Theater). We’ll be there from three to five in the afternoon.
Well, perhaps it is time for all of us to click on the Unseemly Button below – hopefully there is an Unseemly Button below, but then again, if you’re reading these here notes that means that Mr. Mark Bakalor has gotten his lazy loafer butt cheeks out of his bed and fixed our problem.

Yesterday I mentioned that today I might tell you about the CBS Television series I did with Miss Leland Palmer and Miss Diana Canova. It was a summer replacement series for Carol Burnett, way back in 1975. The show had been in rehearsal for a week or so and they were about four days away from taping the first show. They suddenly came to the realization that they had no men who could really do sketch comedy (they had loaded the show with comedians who, while funny doing their own thing, could not really deliver in sketches) and they realized they didn’t have anyone who could move or sing well either. Diana suggested they call me, and they did. I ran over to CBS Fairfax and met everyone, I think I sang a song, and they hired me on the spot. This was a dream come true, being a regular in a variety show on CBS – it’s what I’d dreamed of because I used to attend variety shows at that studio when I was a teen. Unfortunately, because I was brought in at the last minute, they couldn’t adjust for me, and we had to tape the first show just a couple of days later. I could not believe how bad the writing was, but I liked the director, Jeff Margolis, even though he was more of a traffic man than a real director. Well, we finally taped that first show – Dinah (as in Shore) and Her New Best Friends. Dinah didn’t show up until the final run-through, and her job on the show was basically to announce the bits – and then there were a couple of segments where we all just sat in a set that looked like someone’s idea of a living room. Somehow we got through the first show. It went downhill from there, in terms of the writing, and they fired the first set of writers and brought in new ones, plus a new director. By the end of the eight weeks, we’d gone through four sets of writers and three directors. It was horrid – the kind of thing where you don’t even want to come out of your dressing room. But I loved Dinah and she adored me, so that was fun.
Here’s an example of what we dealt with. I went to the producers and told them I was a songwriter and that I’d love to do some of my own material – I said I had funny songs, nice songs, romantic songs. They thought that was splendid and slated a slot for me to sing a big song in the next show. So, what did they have me sing? I Write the Songs. I looked at them and said, “But I do write the songs, why do I have to sing I Write the Songs?” They thought that was a good setup and that in subsequent weeks I’d sing my own songs. So, fine, I sang I Write the Songs. I never did get to sing any of my own. They didn’t know what the hell to do with poor Leland, and she never got to strut her stuff. I remember we were all sitting around getting notes, and she just started to cry, it was so hopeless. Diana and I fared a bit better, because we could sometimes make the junk look better than it was, just with our personalities. We did a Sonny and Cher parody that was pretty okay as I recall. The comedians did their own thing, but I only found one of them amusing, Gary Muledeer. Gary was dating a young actress who was just getting her start – Debra Winger was her name, and she used to hang out with us in my dressing room. One week, Cindy Williams was our guest, and thank goodness she refused to do the sketch they’d written for us (it was grotesque) and I quickly wrote a sketch that played to our strengths, and it was really funny, just brought the house down (we taped in front of a live audience). The cue card guys were really impressed, because we actually knew our lines. Anyway, it all mercifully ended. There were a handful of moments that were fun – Cindy, Diana and I did one of the most ineptly performed tap routines (Tap your Troubles Away) ever committed to tape – I’m fond of that. I did receive quite a bit of fan mail, but the funny thing was that at the precise moment of our series, which should have made all of us hot as a pistol, there was another show going on, a half-hour later on Saturday nights, called Saturday Night Live, and there was a fellow on that show who looked like me. Well, that show and that fellow hit big time, and I had a lot of trouble after that, because suddenly I looked like someone else. Mr. Chevy Chase once told me that for the first few years of his career he’d been told he looked like me.
Well, that was a little trip down nostalgia lane, wasn’t it? Don’t forget, tomorrow is Ask BK Day, so I hope you’re thinking of your excellent questions.
We finally had three High Winners in our handy-dandy trivia contest. The question was:
A huge Broadway musical flop. The music was by a legendary composer, and I do mean legendary. The artistic consultant was a legendary lyricist. The cast included a future soap star, a Tony Award-winning leading man, someone who is appearing in a hit musical on Broadway right now, and the husband of someone who is appearing in a hit Broadway musical right now.
Name the musical.
Name the legendary composer.
Name the legendary lyricist who served as “artistic consultant”.
Name the four cast members referenced above.
And the answers are:
The musical: Teddy and Alice
The legendary composer: John Phillip Sousa
The artistic consultant: Alan Jay Lerner
The four cast members: Ron Raines (future soap star - Guiding Light), Len Cariou (Tony- winning leading man), Nancy Opel (currently appearing in Urinetown - there were other answers which would have been correct, too), and David Green (husband of Judy Kaye, currently on Broadway in Mamma Mia!).
Our High Winners are Tim Hedgepeth, Jed, and Michael Shayne (JMK got all the answers save for David Green). Our electronic hat has chosen Jed this week's Highest Winner, so if Jed will get me his handy-dandy address, he will receive a sparkling prize.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must climb ev’ry mountain and ford ev’ry stream and follow ev’ry rainbow till I find my dream. I shall do that whilst motoring about in my automobile which is not a Ford, so I will have to Infiniti ev’ry stream. Today’s topic of discussion: What is the worst job you’ve ever had? I mean the absolute worst. I’ll start: It wasn’t being an usher, it wasn’t working the concession stand at the World Theater on Hollywood Blvd. and it wasn’t any show business job, although I’ve had a few clunkers along the way. It was the one day I spent selling Bibles when I was seventeen. That was just the worst day ever. We were taken to some awful downtrodden neighborhood where we tried to sell these Bibles to people who could ill afford them. I lasted exactly an hour and then I demanded to be taken back from whence we came. Your turn.

Replies: 44 Unseemly Comments

Well, I guess we're up and running (at least I could post the notes) - of course I forgot to include the trivia answer because I am senile, but it's there now, so just scroll up if you've already read the notes and didn't see it.
Posted by bk @ 08/20/2002 09:32 AM PST

The worst job I had was the first... I was 14 years old and a "pony walker" at the Brookfield Zoo near Chicago. The waliing kids wasn't the bad part...
Did you sell Bibles with Moss and Addy Prey?
By the way, do you know if the Museum of Television and Radio has any episodes of "Dinah and her New Bst Friends"?
Posted by William E. Lurie @ 08/20/2002 09:35 AM PST

Wouldn't it be Fjord every stream?
Posted by Craig @ 08/20/2002 09:39 AM PST

Well, this one is easy. The summer that I graduated from high school I got a job at a frozen pizza factory (it shall remain nameless) in the suburb right next to mine-Fridley (that's the one right next to mine, not mine). It was the night shift and we had to clean the factory. Luckily, the place was not open 24 hours so they couldn't make the worst frozen pizza on the face of the planet, all the time, they had to quit at 11pm. As an incentive, I guess, they said we could eat all the pizza we wanted at "lunch" (which was at something like 3am). One taste and you decided it was better to bring your lunch or even go hungry. I lasted the summer (about 3 months) and then, because I wasn't going off to college right away, I moved on to another job (morning clerk at the Minneapolis Athletic Club bowling "lanes" They are "lanes" not "alleys". This is a high class joint after all). I have never (and this is absolutely true) eaten a slice of frozen pizza again, no matter what the brand.
Posted by Ben @ 08/20/2002 09:44 AM PST

Reading about that Jewish dating service gave me a wonderful idea. I think you should join and give us updates on your dates :)
Btw, just the thought of you joining a dating service makes me smile (or is that laugh?)
Jennifer
Posted by Jennifer @ 08/20/2002 09:47 AM PST

My worst job was in the Summer of 69. Actually, there was competition that summer, but the very WORST was working in an ice cream plant. I had third shift (overnight). It was always cold, it was always messy, and it put me off ice cream for the longest time. I worked that job about three weeks. I was 20 years old and about to enter my senior year in college. The one good thing about the job was that I passed a Krispy Kreme facility going home each morning at 5:45 a.m. And, oh, yes! I'd buy a dozen donuts each morning! Hot and gooey right off the the glazing belt!
Other jobs that summer included camp counselor, an almost-Bible salesman (I bailed after they finally told us what they'd be asking us to sell), a heavy construction worker (lasted all of 45 minutes), and finally, the piece de resistance and my job for the rest of the summer, plus Christmas break -- making Pizza Hut pizzas! Hooray!
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 08/20/2002 09:51 AM PST

I don't know whether the Museum has copies of the show or not - I think I'll call my pal Jane Klain over there and find out? If not, I think I have most if not all of them on three quarter inch tape. I do know I have a compilation tape with most of my stuff.
Well, I did put in my profile at JDate, just for the amusement of it. Hopefully I will never hear from anyone.
Posted by bk @ 08/20/2002 09:52 AM PST

My worst job ever? Hmm...I've had so many bad ones. There was the janitor job where I literally had to mop the walls because people apparently can't aim.
There was the Chester the Cheetah job at Target...being in costume on what was easily the hottest day of the year, with my head twisted around so I couldn't see.
No, those couldn't even compare with the summer stock gig I had last summer. First off, let me explain that I am a character actor with a tenor-ish voice. That being said, I was hired to play Jud Fry in Oklahoma! at an outdoor theatre in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I was also going to play Benjamin in Seven Brides...Brothers as well as understudying Adam. Well, I got to the theatre and realized it was nothing more than a slab of concrete with some really bad building facades set up. Our dressing rooms were about 1/4 mile uphill from the "stage" and that was the only place where you would find air conditioning. Now, Tulsa in the summer is HOT. We opened Oklahoma! after only 6 days of rehearsal and on opening day, we started rehearsals for Seven Brides. For the next four days, the brothers were called to the theatre at 9:00 am and we rehearsed (in the sun) until 5:30, which was our dinner break. We had to be back at the theatre by 6:30 to get ready for Oklahoma!, which ran until nearly 11:15. We were required to stay onstage, in costume, signing autographs, which usually lasted until 11:45 and then we had a 12:15 call to be in costume and ready to run Seven Brides from the top. Did I mention that our apartment complex was almost 45 minutes from the theatre? One of our four days of rehearsal was used to learn the barn-raising dance, which we did outside in the mid-day sun. We literally ran the dance 11 times in a row. We were given one bottle of lukewarm water and if you felt that you needed more to drink, you were free to use the rusty garden hose out back. We had scorpions in our boots, tarantulas and rattlesnakes onstage (right next to the huge piles of horse manure) and I had the good fortune to be the one thrown to the concrete ground during the Shiveree scene at the end of Oklahoma! Oh, yes...we sang along with a karaoke CD of the scores to the show, and we had no body mics whatsoever...just floor mics with no monitors. Talk about oversinging!
Just think...I've really only begun to scratch the surface with what was wrong about that place. I could go on, but I don't want to bore you...
There were also those three years that I waited tables at an all-you-can-eat-buffet restaurant. Who needs a waiter when there's a buffet? (The owner of the restaurant was murdered by her husband. Remind me to tell you that story later.)
Posted by Jason @ 08/20/2002 09:57 AM PST

Jason: I did full body costume work also. In fact it was one of my first jobs here in NYC WAAAAAAYYYYY back in 1980. I was Chubby, the Huggable Bear at Gimble's Department Store. They tried but just couldn't seem to put something together to rival Macy's just down the block. They thought a person stuffed into a hot, smelly bear costume randomly hugging people in the store would be just the trick! Well, it didn't work so they decided to change Chubby to the Breakfast with Santa gigs (many small children w/piercing screams at 9am on a Saturday morning and the screams became even more piercing, if that's possible, when they saw a hugh brown thing standing next to Santa. Scared out of their wits, they were) and they moved me up to the 6th floor where I became Twiggy the Talking Tree. At least I didn't have to wear a tree costume. No, nothing so inventive. I sat behind a wall with a small piece of one-way glass and spoke to all the happy people who came up to see and have their picture taken with Santa! Oh, ho, ho, how funny was that?!? Especially with a sterotypically drunk Santa. But, I won't complain too much. I was paid well, actually (in cash) and the money kept me going for another couple of months. I also played Oscar the Grouch in an arena touring show based on Sesame Street (got my Equity card doing that) and as I've mentioned too many times, I was DangerMouse for Nickelodeon in the 1980s. None of them compare to the total awfulness (is that word?) of the pizza job I mentioned above.
Posted by Ben @ 08/20/2002 10:47 AM PST

They named the bear "Chubby?" What kind of leather bar were you working for??
Posted by The Insolent One @ 08/20/2002 11:11 AM PST

Worst job? That's a no-brainer for me. Just two years ago, summer 2000, I spent my days working at a family fun park. Now this may not sound all that bad, but I really did not enjoy being the bumper boat guy eight hours a day, in 100 degree heat, with a pathetic little excuse for a sun umbrella that was maybe effective one hour of the day, and with the fershluganah boats that were always breaking down! But it did leave my nights and weekends free for my summer theatre work, so I suffered through it.
Posted by Jed @ 08/20/2002 11:27 AM PST

My worst job has to be when I was catering for a local university. The job basically consisted of walking around the president's house with trays of food for various alumni events. That wasn't the bad part. The bad part was when they called me to come in one night because they were short on help. So I put on my black pants, tux shirt and bow tie, go in and find that they are short on help alright, but short on help in the CAFETERIA! So I had to put on the apron, the baseball cap and plastic gloves and spend my evening serving hot dogs that looked green. At the time a weaver's convention was meeting at the unveristy and let me just say they were some of the most unpleasant ladies I've ever encountered. I just wanted to scream, "I HAVE A COLLEGE EDUCATION!" But I thought better of it, kept my mouth shut, and served the green hot dogs.
About online dating services: I find it disheartening that when asking you to check what types of music you listen to, showtunes are rarely an option. And if they are an option, in rural, central Pennsylvania; they're usually not that big a hit.
Posted by Mark L. @ 08/20/2002 11:47 AM PST

I am in total awe of the various jobs folks have performed in order do what they love.
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 08/20/2002 11:57 AM PST

Confucius says:
The best way to prevent the piercing screams of children in Macy's is to have Macy's stop piercing the children.
Posted by Confucius @ 08/20/2002 12:00 PM PST

Well, luckily, I am not yet old enough to have had a bad job. I worked at Red Lobster as a hostess, and as a sales specialist at the Gap. But I enjoyed both of them. But believe me, with all of your posts, I know I have a lot to look forward to!
Posted by Megan @ 08/20/2002 12:12 PM PST

A sales specialist? Funny...when I was selling clothes, I was just a salesperson.
Posted by Jason @ 08/20/2002 12:23 PM PST

Worst job?
Being an atmosphere player and appearing in 18 of 22 episodes of a tv series and knowing you can write better teleplays than the writers they had. I wrote two spec scripts (was given to the head writer by the A.D. who I was friendly with) and then a few days later I was dropped from the last episodes of the series. MMMMM A connection?
A friend who I went to drama school was a supporting player on the show and I featured her in one of the scripts. She read it and told me it was the best one she read all season.
Shouldn't really complain as it gave me $$$ to live on and led to some other film and TV commercial work, but I it soured me on acting. Since then I have had two plays produced and two others have been workshopped. I discovered I enjoyed writing more and contributing to haineshisway.com
Posted by Michael Shayne @ 08/20/2002 12:49 PM PST

It wasn't a bad job -- just a dumb job. The local Ford dealership was purging their old files, so they hired some of us high school kids to come in and copy the customer's name, address, phone number, and car purchased onto an index card -- then they threw out the old file.
I found BK's profile on JDate!!
Posted by Laura @ 08/20/2002 01:48 PM PST

My working life seems so dull. I had an after school job dlivering prescriptions etc for the local pharmacy. Worst part was when the customers lived up in the hilly area of my home town. Sometimes teh shop we get a call from one lady who had forgotten to buy jellybeans for her children and I had to make the long treck (by bicycle) on what always seemed the worst night of the year just to deliver confectionary to ankle biters. Pharmacies/chemists here are quite different from drug stores - in the sixties they rarely sold anything that was not of a medicinal nature - jellybeans were glucose based so it was OK. My worst job thougt was a few weeks only and it was in ano office block cleaning ventian blinds (horizintal slats) without any specialises equipment and withour being able to take them down - bucket and cloth job and 20 years of grime!
I suspect BK has a Dorian Gray type picture in his attic. He must be in his 80's with such a full life! Maybe it is Guy who gets older as BK gets younger. Has anyone seen Guy recently?
Ron & Jason. Mail goes today.
Posted by Tom from OZ @ 08/20/2002 02:51 PM PST

How was Jason's audition?
Posted by Tom from OZ @ 08/20/2002 02:53 PM PST

Ahh yes, Jason's audition. I meant to ask about that, but obviously forgot. Do tell, Jason!
Posted by Jed @ 08/20/2002 03:06 PM PST

And, Michael Shayne, are we to be privy to the same of said TV series?
Posted by William F. Orr @ 08/20/2002 04:49 PM PST

"same" ===> "name"
Posted by William F. Orr @ 08/20/2002 04:50 PM PST

Ladies and gentleman, we have a lull. Yes, you heard it hear, dear readers, we have a lull. A late afternoon lull. Perhaps everyone is off taking a nappy. Well, make the nappy snappy for it is posts which make us happy, plus we don't want to have to bitch-slappy anyone. Did you know that I once worked at the Broadway in Century City. I was barely sixteen, and it was one of the first buildings and/or stores in the brand new Century City. I worked there for one week, but realized I couldn't do school and work - too hard. I worked in some department that had amusing gift ideas, like gold boxes and wind-up wooden birds in cages. My very first looky-loo was none other than Mr. Ernest Borgnine. He really wanted one of those wooden birds in cages and I really think he was about to buy it, when his wife, Tovah, showed up and put the kibosh on it. He was very nice and we had a lovely chat until that harridan Tovah showed up and put the kibosh on the whole damn thing. Damn her eyes. I also once worked at Orbach's Department Store, whilst in college, where I sold women's shoes for one day.
Posted by bk @ 08/20/2002 04:55 PM PST

Well, I have not been taking a nappy, I have been at the delightful movie Tadpole, starring the incredible Bebe Neuwirth. It was a terriffically enjoyable film, if rather slight, but it made me strongly dislike digital video. It makes outlines rather fuzzy, and the background blurs out whenever the camera is moving. Rather disorienting. The movie was still enjoyable, though it would have lost nothing had it been a one-act play, which isn't necessarily bad. Recommended, particularly if the local art house is less expensive one night of the week.
Posted by Hapgood @ 08/20/2002 06:18 PM PST

Re: yesterday - yes, I have been errant and truant. I have been in England dealing with... unpleasant things. Then I have been in southern California, attending a conference and working on my tan (ha!). Then I have been in Toronto, working on The Play That Ate My Life. The Play That Ate My Life will open two weeks from Thursday, after which point normal service will be resumed as soon as I can remember what 'normal' actually means.
I did not write The Play That Ate My Life, by the way. Someone called James Reaney did. And its real title is "The Easter Egg".
As for the worst job I've ever had - oh my God, there have been so very many. Probably the most hideous - because I did it for about three years - was working for a specialist map and travel bookseller in central London (I won't give their name because I wouldn't want them to get free advertising). Their retail manager might just be the stupidest individual I've ever encountered - and I've done jury service, and met several Tory MPs (including the un-fabulous and now incarcerated Mr. Jeffrey Archer, whose personality made me want to get my stomach pumped. And not in a good way). Petrol pump attendant was also not fun. I did door-to-door sales for about a minute in 1994 - the same year I did contract cleaning in university residences (1994 was not a career highpoint for me). You can make some fascinating deductions from what undergraduates leave behind in their rooms after they move out. Like, whether or not they kept gerbils. Or how well they hold their beer.
Posted by Stephen Farrow @ 08/20/2002 06:20 PM PST

Gotta run for now, but I thought I should post. I will read today's posts and write some more later this evening.
Posted by Kerry @ 08/20/2002 06:57 PM PST

First off, I must thank all of you dear readers who sent good vibes my way today. You are too, too kind. I have indeed returned from the audition and I have triumphed! Yes, I got through my song--high notes et al.--and I do believe, dear readers, that I will be singing for Sir Cameron MacIntosh sometime at the end of next month in this workshop. It's not a done deal yet--no phone calls or emails to confirm it--but I think I got in (based on information obtained from the Musical Director). I'm very excited by this.
The joy and excitement of getting my first real New York workshop gig has been overshadowed, however. Yes, it's true. I did a very stupid thing at work today and I may lose my job over it. Picture it: August 19, 2002, 5:03 pm. I'm running late for my audition, which is 16 blocks uptown at 5:30. A woman who works in our office comes to me as I'm gathering my things to leave and says she must send a Fed Ex package because it has to arrive at it's destination tomorrow morning. She has no clue how to send this package, so I am required to help her. She took the packing slip with her to write down the address and as she turned the corner I said to a friend in a very unseemly tone, "Why do people wait til 5:00 to get their shit together?" Just as I say this, I realize that someone else has come to my desk with yet another package that needs to be courriered and she overheard me. She gave me a terrible look and then practically tossed the package at me, saying "This can wait til tomorrow," and she walked away in a huff. Now, I know I'm just a temp, but I'm deathly afraid of being fired from this job. My temp counselor (or so they're called) would not look kindly on this random act of bitchiness. I guess I'll find out tomorrow what they're going to do to me. Will they flog me? Will they burn me at the stake? Will they fire me? I don't know.
Tom from Oz: Thank you so much!! I owe you!
Posted by Jason @ 08/20/2002 08:17 PM PST

They will do nothing to you or they will incur the wrath of every Hainsie/Kimlet including the lurkers out there in the dark. The wrath of the Hainsies/Kimlets is far worst than the wrath of Khan or even the wrath of Cohen. If they do anything untoward they will all receive a karmic bitch-slapping the likes of which they have never experienced.
Posted by bk @ 08/20/2002 08:51 PM PST

BK:
Look at me when I am
bitch-slapping you!
You seem to have come
to your senses already,
but a reinforcing bitch-slap
seemed also in order.
1. Do not kill the web site.
2. Do not kill the Unseemly
Trivia Contest.
3. Do not let it or them get
you down.
Perhaps many of us are away
for August--I am--and surfing
from afar or by
psychotelekinetic connection.
Do carrie on, and have some
summer cake.
Kerry: Cake.
Craig:
[Bitch-slap].
I detest this
fershluganah program.
Posted by freedunit @ 08/20/2002 09:18 PM PST

Come to your senses,
Defences are not the way to go,
And you know,
Or at least you knew.
Everything's strange,
And you've changed and I don't know
What to do to get through,
I don't know what to do-oo.
Posted by Jonathan Larson @ 08/20/2002 09:46 PM PST

Is 'psychotelekinetic connection' a cut song from 'Carrie'?
Expiring minds want to know.
Posted by Stephen Farrow @ 08/20/2002 09:47 PM PST

The worst job was when I was 17. I lasted 3 days with a pest control company...The Critter Catchers. That was the name. I was a "Critter" trainee. I didn't stick around long enough to find out what you were called after you were no longer in training. I lasted until day 3 when we went to an apartment that was just infested with cockroaches. They were so thick on the floor that you couldn't see the kitchen tile. They ran some hideous gas all over the apartment (this was in the 60's) and it was my job to sweep the dead roaches up and put them in plastic bags. To this day, I cannot stand to look at a cockroach.
Posted by Dennis Clancy @ 08/20/2002 10:04 PM PST

Jason. You don't owe me! It is a pleasure. When we do we get clues about the workshop?
I shall send very strong emus to your boss to kick his dunny down. (That is of course an Oz expression. Kerry will probably understand). Good to see all the spies coming in from the cold. Now all we need are even more lurkers to post. (OK I admit it is addictive but there are worse things - like being in a bear suit (or at my age and shape - in a bare suit).
Hapgood. Was "Tadpole" a prequel to "The Frogs"?
Posted by Tom from OZ @ 08/20/2002 10:12 PM PST

I say Dennis Clancy wins the awful job contest!
Posted by Laura @ 08/20/2002 10:24 PM PST

Tom: You can rest assured, I will post as soon as I find anything out concerning the workshop. If you're curious as to what the workshop is, I can give you a bit of information.
There's a musical version of MOBY DICK that's been floating around England for a few years. It started out as a small production and then moved to the West End where it flopped. It's been rewritten about 10 times and Sir Mackintosh feels that it's his fault the show bombed because he made it too big. Well...he owns half of Music Theatre International, which is one of the biggest licensing companies in the biz, and he asked my friend Russell to make a definitive edition of the show. That's what will be presented in September...the "final" version. Bryan Batt (currently Lumiere in Beauty and the Beast on Broadway, among other roles) will be playing Captain Ahab and Sir Cameron will be in attendance. It would be a great opportunity for me and the rest of the cast to be seen by several industry big-wigs. I'll definitely be calling my agent contacts to ask them to attend (should I get the gig).
How soon can you get those emus over here, just in case? ;-)
Posted by Jason @ 08/20/2002 10:27 PM PST

Ah yes. "Moby Dick". I saw it in the West End. Please tell me my favourite line is still in it:
"Three years at sea and still no sign of dick!!!!"
Posted by Stephen Farrow @ 08/20/2002 10:51 PM PST

I, too, have to wonder why it takes some people all day to get their shit together. I have co-workers who know full well that if they haven't gotten their letters done by a certain time, for either USPS or FedEx, that they won't get processed that day...and STILL they persist in pretending that it isn't so...that the letters will go out...that at 4:50 p.m., FedEx will still pick up by 5 p.m.
And they get paid lots and lots of money to think that way!
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 08/20/2002 11:39 PM PST

Topic #1: I've been very fortunate in my jobs. I've only worked two different places in my whole life (I'm 36 years old, so far). I work in the administrative offices of a library system in southwest Washington (state) and have had various jobs within the office (I started with them when I was 18). The only other place I've worked was during college at the Western Washington University (class of '89) music library.
Topic #2: I placed a personal ad on the Internet and got a few responses. One even panned out and we've been seeing each other (when we can, we don't live in the same city) for more than two years. There are success stories. :-)
My favorite quote from Topic #3: OBSESSION IS NOT JUST A PERFUME! (assuming that I'm thinking of the same "Moby Dick").
PS. I found Bruce's ad, also! I had to look!
Posted by George @ 08/21/2002 12:39 AM PST

Ron et al. (who is al?): Thank you so much for backing me up on this! I don't know why they think that if our office closes at 5:00 that they can have a messenger service pick up and deliver to another office after 5:00! I haven't been sacked yet, but the morning is still young and the girl that I apparently offended has yet to arrive to work. Like sand through the hourglass...these are the days of my life. :-\
Posted by Jason @ 08/21/2002 06:07 AM PST

Jason - seems like all offices are the same. Our UPS pickup is at 4:15, so I usually have our receptionist prepare labels by 2PM if I know a package is going out. If for any reason I have a late one I just fill out the labels myself. Seems that many "senior" personnel forgot "UPS 101" once they rose to the top. One random act of bitchiness should not get you canned, but then again you work in NY (lol).
Hope your audition went well and your voice cooperated after all. Fill us in!
Posted by Phil @ 08/21/2002 07:41 AM PST

Jason -- glad the audition went well. Hope everything at work goes well today, too. Yes, some people are idiots for waiting until the last minute. (Ok, I admit to being a last-minute idiot -- but I do my stuff myself; I don't ask someone else to do it for me.)
Posted by Laura @ 08/21/2002 09:16 AM PST

Thanks, Laura...
Things at work are going pretty well, I suppose. No one has flogged or flanked or fileted me...yet. But that's not the point of this post (what's with all my alliteration today?). The point of this post is that I have news, dear readers. Oh yes, I have very big news that I will share with you as soon as BK is able to give us the Notes for today.
Posted by Jason @ 08/21/2002 09:44 AM PST

Jeux sans frontieres
Posted by . @ 04/05/2003 06:35 PM PST

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