haines his way

09/04/2002:
"THE LIVELY FAMOUR"

Well, dear readers, yesterday we were back to the good old days here at haineshisway.com and what fun it was. It was lively. Oh, yes, it was lively and that’s the way we like it – lively. That is what we are jiggy with – lively. So, let’s make September our most lively month. Let’s make every day a lively day. Let us sing that famour song by Mr. Irving Berlin – It’s a Lively Day Today. Has anyone noticed that I typed “famour” instead of “famous”? I mean, the ‘s’ isn’t anywhere near the ‘r’ on my handy-dandy keyboard, so why does that happen? In any case, now I have to live with it – I refuse to go back and fix it because I believe it was meant to happen that way. Besides, I like the new word “famour”, don’t you? It’s so French looking. It could mean “for love” if it were French. But it is not French it is English, so I believe “famour” means “a person who eats Chinese food with their fingers”. What the hell am I talking about?
Last night I watched two count them two DVDs. First I watched the very entertaining motion picture entitled No Way To Treat a Lady, starring Mr. George Segal, Mr. Rod Steiger and Miss Lee Remick. I really loved this movie when I saw it way back when, and I still get a kick out of it all these years later. It’s based on a paperback book by Harry Longbaugh. Later, when Mr. Longbaugh became famous, he decided it would be okay to tell people he wrote it, so the film does say based on a novel by William Goldman. Harry Longbaugh, of course, would figure in Mr. Goldman’s biggest success, because Harry Longbaugh was the real name of the Sundance Kid. Anyway, the movie is a real tour de force for Mr. Steiger, and Mr. Segal and Miss Remick are beyond charming. Eileen Heckart, as the Jewish mother of them all, is a bit grating, but still funny. There are some things that don’t work, and one cheat that I hated back then and that I hate now, which was totally unnecessary. The film is well directed by Jack Smight, and the transfer looks great. Plus you get to see that Joe Allen, where a very long scene takes place, looked exactly the same back in 1968. And the wonderful Barbara Baxley (from She Loves Me) has a terrific scene. Some of it hasn’t stood the test of time, but it’s still fun and I’d recommend it.
The other DVD I watched was a motion picture entitled The Gypsy Moths, a film of John Frankenheimer, and one of the few from his best period that I’d missed. In fact, I would say it’s the last film from his most interesting period. Everything after this film didn’t ever really seem like a Frankenheimer film to me. It’s an interesting movie – just really a small character piece with some good stunt-parachute action scenes. Those scenes are incredibly scary to me – but the stunts are amazing and so it the aerial photography. The cast couldn’t be better – Burt Lancaster, Deborah Kerr (who very surprisingly has a brief nude scene), Gene Hackman, Scott Wilson (from In Cold Blood), Sheree North, William Windom and, in her first movie role (I think), Bonnie Bedelia. The film also has a gorgeous score from Mr. Elmer Bernstein, who was at the height of his creative powers back in 1969. The pace is very slow, but I enjoyed it. The DVD features the final audio commentary track that Mr. Frankenheimer did prior to his passing away recently. I listened to a bit of it and he clearly loves this film.
What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? Well, I promised you announcements, so I’ll give you the least interesting of them today. But first, let us all click on the Unseemly Button below, because we must keep these notes lively at all costs. The cost of keeping these notes lively, by the way (BTW, in Internet lingo), is $2.43 American.

Is anyone here a famour? I think all the Hainsie/Kimlet famours had best step forward. In fact, all famours should not only step forward they should step lively. Who here eats Chinese food with their fingers? I certainly have been known to pick up a noodle or a rib or a wonton or an egg roll with my famour fingers. I admit it here and now and also now and here: My name is BK and I am a famour.
So, the first of my announcements (and there will be a few this week, I hope) is the least of them. That’s not to say I’m not thrilled about it, but the others are more fun and will appeal to you dear readers more than this first one. But we can’t give them all to you at once, that would be too too lively, don’t you think? We must parse them out. In two count them two weeks, I start work on a new Showtime television program. I don’t really know much about it, other than that it’s a reality show and that my friend David Wechter is on it. I went in, met the producer, and we all got along famously. My job will be basically doing what I did on the Fox TV show called Totally Hidden Video – putting the pieces of the show together in post-production, plus writing the voice-overs for the pieces (in other words, making them stories that are interesting). The voice-overs will be spoken by the hosts of the show, who are none other than Penn and Teller. It’s really just a two or three month gig, but the money is great and I haven’t been in that world for a long time, so it will be fun, I think. The hours are long, however, so while I promise to do the notes daily I do think that there will be days when they will be very short. I also may have some guest notes-writers in to help during that period. So, there you have announcement number one. Tomorrow, number two.
Oh, I know we’ve been a bit errant and truant with our Unseemly Interviews – we had the best of intentions, but people simply are being tremendously slow in doing them – two people have had their interview questions for over two months and I do think that they are about to be in for a bitch-slapping. And Buddy Bregman’s interview is a novel, and we’re trying to get it down from its unwieldy size, otherwise it would take six weeks to get all of it posted. We should have it ready in about two weeks. Meanwhile, we do have a new interview going up this Friday – with our very own delightful and delectable Jennifer Piech. Jennifer was one of the stars of the musical entitled Titanic, and she also appeared at the York in a musical I recorded called After the Fair. She’s also appeared on several of my albums.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must be lively and perhaps I’ll even eat Chinese food and be a famour. I must drive over-the-hill and under-the-dale. I must arrange my hair in an interesting way, like the bartender in Contact. Today’s topic of discussion: Well, you know what today is – today is Ask BK Day, the day in which you get to ask me all your excellent questions. I’ll be back in a bit to check on our lively activity. Ask away, my pretties.

Replies: 27 Unseemly Comments

At home for lunch and just enough time to check in to HHW. I'm currently listening to an interesting audio recording of Gulliver, read by John Gielgud, written by Larry Gelbart and composed by Patrick Williams. This is the first I've heard of this recording (which I bought in LP form on eBay). Are you familiar with it? And was it ever available on CD?
Your review of Gypsy Moths makes me want to rent it. I already know No Way To Treat A Lady.
Anyway, until next time.
Posted by Robert Armin @ 09/04/2002 10:15 AM PST

Now I'll have to get Showtime (or find a friend who has it)!
Need to come up with a question. I haven't asked for a couple of weeks.
Later!
Posted by Ben @ 09/04/2002 10:17 AM PST

First, I think I will take another stab and the difficult task of explaining bold and italics.
If you type
bold
you get
bold.
If you type
italics
you get
italics.
If you type
bold italics
you get
bold italics.
Puff, puff, puff. That was tiring, and only the final result will prove the pudding, because the ferschlugunah preview doesn't show these things up right.
btb (by the bye in Internet Lingo) if you do use bold and/or italics, the important part is to turn them off with the slash tag or else you will be bitch-slapped from here to Carnaby Street by all and sundried.
Oh, and one other handy dandy piece of information for those who preview their comments and then back up to find them vanished into Harvey-land: When I write my comments I always mark them and hit the Copy menu choice in my browser just in case.
Posted by William F. Orr @ 09/04/2002 10:27 AM PST

My question is a propos "Candid Camera" and "Totally Hidden Video." In a previous life as the manager of a temp service, I once provided temps to the one and only Allen Funt for his R-rated cable version of "Cable Camera." Our temps were told they were going to do a market test of a new air freshener, and as they were sitting there in the "testing room," a naked man came in and started doing calisthenics. What, you may ask, is my point? Well, I'm wondering what you consider to be the funniest "Candid Camera" or "Totally Hidden Video" stunt you've ever seen.
Posted by JMK @ 09/04/2002 10:29 AM PST

Yes, yes, yes--"Candid Camera." "Cable Camera" was something entirely different.
Posted by JMK @ 09/04/2002 10:30 AM PST

Here's an easy question for the overly-modest BK: Who produced the cast album of the musical version of No Way the Treat a Lady?
Is Doug Cohen writing anything else that you know of these days?
Posted by William F. Orr @ 09/04/2002 10:31 AM PST

Dear BK --
Have you had any responses to your ad on JDate yet? If so, we want details. Well, not TOO much detail.
Posted by Laura @ 09/04/2002 11:05 AM PST

Question for famour BK:
When the label that does not get mention finally releases the Brent Barrett CD (it's been delayed three weeks so far and will probably be delayed again), will there be an extra track if I buy it from them or will the version sold in stores be complete?
By the way, your readers may not know it, but BB got his start on ALL MY CHILDREN playing an obsessed model who killed Kim Delaney's character when she wanted off the show.
Posted by William E. Lurie @ 09/04/2002 11:15 AM PST

Bruce,
I don't know if this has been asked before, but, from among those whom you never have worked with or produced an album for and who are still singing today, whom would you like to produce for and why? What something special would you want to "bring to their table" that they're not getting from their current producers?
Posted by steveg @ 09/04/2002 11:50 AM PST

Bruce, you may be interested to learn that Elmer Bernstein's gorgeous score to "The Gypsy Moths" is now available on CD in glorious stereophonic sound through Film Score Monthly (www.filmscoremonthly.com) in a limited edition of 3,000 copies.
Mine arrived yesterday, along with their golden age release of Hugo Friedhofer's "Above and Beyond" (in scintillating monaural sound).
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 09/04/2002 01:26 PM PST

Once again, I find myself listening to the Terry Trotter ...in Jazz CD's. So, my question for BK is this...
Which is your personal favorite of these albums, and why so?
Posted by Jed @ 09/04/2002 01:41 PM PST

BK. Who are your three favourite characters in Sondheim musicals?
Which is your favourite of Jerry's Girls?
Who would you like to see hosting next year's Tony awards?
Posted by Tom from OZ @ 09/04/2002 02:29 PM PST

Hi Bruce,
First questions:
You produced two Emily Skinner and Alice Riley albums and then one Emily Skinner solo album. Why was there no Alice Ripley solo album?
Would you produce a solo David Campbell CD? I think you're input, ideas for material and arrangements would work nicely with his talents.
Posted by Kerry @ 09/04/2002 02:53 PM PST

I was listening to The Stephen Schwartz Album and it made me think of the following question:
At the end of Corner of the Sky sung by Mr Guy Haines; you decide to fade the song out instead of a "definite" ending. I am wondering why producers decide to fade certainn songs out.
Sidebar:
As for ending of songs, I always thought that Don't Cry For Me Argentina has the worst ending for any song. After the last vocal line the music goes on and on.
As an arranger how would you end the song on the last vocal line?
Sidebar #2:
As we probably know that Broadway singers who do various cast recordings and Broadway related recordings are a small group of friends. On John McGlinn's recording of Anything Goes a number of well known performers participated in the recording mainly in the chorus. They decided to use nom de plumes I have been able to figure out who two of them were and read who another are.
Judy Green (Her married name) is Judy Kaye
Phil Ossaffee (Philosphy) is John McGlinn
Michael B. Wailing is Michael McGuire.
So I am hoping you will notice who the balance of the singers are:
Bryan Landrine
De-Bouree Bach
Dustin Sacks
Bruce Hubbard used his own name but I think this was because he passed away before the album was released.
Posted by Michael Shayne @ 09/04/2002 03:59 PM PST

Dear BK: Do you consider yourself a "dog" person or a "cat" person? Do you have any idea why it seems politically incorrect to be both at the same time?
Also, in a totally different area of interest, what are your favorite cookbooks?
Thank-you.
Posted by S. Woody White @ 09/04/2002 05:30 PM PST

One of our dear readers got an e-mail from another dear reader with an attachment that said "Kimmel photo". BEWARE. This is a virus. I'm not sure how it labels like that. Unless you contact the sender and they tell you it's okay to open an attachment, DO NOT OPEN ANY. As for these things purportedly coming from bruce@haineshisway.com - that is simply not the case. There is no bruce@haineshisway.com - those things get forwarded to a real e-mail address. The way in which this virus works is that it gets in someone's mail box and gloms onto all addresses, such as bruce@haineshisway.com. Then it just multiplies and replicates - but, you can always look at the headers and you will clearly see none of them emanate from here. The headers usually say (somewhere at the bottom) "apparently from" and then an e-mail address. I got one of those virus things and the apparently from was from an enemy - I thought I'd nailed the creep, but then I was told that his name must have been in someone's e-mail address book, and the whole thing just goes on and on and on. You would think there would be a way to trace this back with all this technology, but these peckerheads are clever and their tracks are totally covered and everyone else gets caused grief.
Posted by bk @ 09/04/2002 05:46 PM PST

BK: Do you think you will ever be an actor again? A famour actor at that. Would you rather do theatre, film or TV? What is your favorite TV show? Do you wear boxers or briefs?
Posted by Dennis Clancy @ 09/04/2002 06:18 PM PST

Sorry to post again but I just went to my e mail and there 25 virus laden messages. One of them actually said it had a virus. The appear as non deliverable mail and as Bruce said, they just duplicate themselves with email addresses I've never heard of. Of course, there are attachments. I deleted them immediately. I know all of us on this site are very computer savvy, but do be careful. I was horrified when I saw all that stuff in my mail box.
Posted by Dennis Clancy @ 09/04/2002 06:28 PM PST

All this glomming could drive a person crazy!
I havea handy dandy progam called MailWasher which I acquired after a story about it aired on MSNBC - it tracks your incoming emails, processes them, marks them for bouncing, deleting, lets you know if a virus might be attached to a message AND does let you know for certain if a message is indeed virally infected. Only one of my incoming messages today was marked as "possibly virus;" and that particular message contained no attachments, but did come from a special Hainesie; and like our man BK has stated - although the message source said haineshisway, that particular message was NOT FROM HERE. Norton Antivirus then informed me that my computer was virus free - - still, a scare that none of us particularly want to share.
Posted by td @ 09/04/2002 06:31 PM PST

Wow.. I was just visited by the Errant and Truancy officers of HainesHisWay.com. It wasn't pretty, let me tell you. But I am back to ask my questions...so without and further ado annie..
1. Have you purchased a copy of the Hairspray OCR yet? And if so, have you listened to it? And if not, why haven't you yet?
2. If you were producing a CD called "Everything I Needed to Know I Learned from a Broadway Musical" - what songs about life, love, etc would comprise the cd
3. How will you be celebrating the jewish new year? Will you be fasting on Yom Kippur?
4. Which side is THE sunny side of the street?
5. Will there be Meltz and Ernest products to buy (not just a cd)?
6. Can you explain why the word DICTIONARY is IN the dictionary?
Well that will do it for me for this week. Im still trying to play email and phone catch-up from being away this weekend.. which is something I shall post about tomorrow...
Posted by Craig @ 09/04/2002 07:06 PM PST

OH OH OH.. one more question..
#8: Do you think anyone has ever tried to make popcorn out of baby corn? What do you think they would call such a product?
Posted by Craig @ 09/04/2002 08:22 PM PST

To reiterate the false e-mail
warning, I too had something
marked "undeliverable mail"
bearing the address of a
fellow Hainsie/Kimlet. But this
person and I have never
exchanged e-mails, so we're
obviously being culled off other
people's lists. Be careful, one
and all, all and one!
Posted by Jed @ 09/04/2002 08:23 PM PST

Was it from my email address? I get paranoid when you guys start tip-toeing (through the daisies) around the names of people.
I just saw quite possibly the largest roach in New York climbing our wall. This is odd (and disgusting) but more ODD, cause I've never seen hide nor hair of a roach in this apartment. Hopefully it was just a stray that wandered in from outside. Yeah, that's it...I'll keep telling myself that until I move out on Saturday.
I can't think of any questions for you, BK...isn't that terrible? My creative juices have dried up. :-\
Posted by Jason @ 09/04/2002 10:07 PM PST

If your answer to a previous question is Yes! (i.e., do you have the "Hairspray" OCR), what do you think of Harvey Fierstein's songs? (i.e., do you feel they were recorded well?).
Have you heard any of the contestants on "American Idol" sing? If so, which, if any, do you believe would have a good shot at a musical theater career?
And...would you work with him or her?
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 09/04/2002 10:26 PM PST

Ok, I'm getting this in under the wire and probably will not get answered, but it's easy. BK - a friend of mine said you've produced a recording since leaving Fynsworth Alley, is this true and if so, what is it?
Have a great eve all you night owls!
Posted by Matthew @ 09/04/2002 11:02 PM PST

Regarding e-Mail viruses:
1) Create a phony e-mail address in your address book and name it 000 (zeros, not the letter). This will make it the first address in your address book. If a virus starts through your address book this will come back to it as a bad address and it will go no further.
2) Buy and install Norton Anti-Virus. This will warn you of any e-mail you may receive that contains a virus and allow you to delete it before you even open it.
Posted by William E. Lurie @ 09/05/2002 06:04 AM PST

I know that Bruce will answer his own questions, but I just wanted to point out that Alice Ripley did indeed record a solo CD, released by Sh-K-Boom records. It is not a theatre recording, however, but features her own 'pop' compositions.
re: American Idol, I have to confess that I have been watching the show from the beginning. Both my wife and I commented that it was a shame that there was never a Broadway category, so that we could hear how the contestants approached show tunes. The closest we got was 'big band' night, which was actually one of the most enjoyable episodes. As for the singing abilities of the finalists, only Kelly, Justin and Tamyra had any real vocal ability. Tamyra actually took a stab at "And I Am Telling You..." from DREAMGIRLS as her first performance in the final ten. She did a passable job, but she is no Jennifer Holliday.
Posted by Dave @ 09/05/2002 09:05 AM PST

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