haines his way

09/17/2002:
"KARMA, BABY, KARMA"

Well, dear readers, I must hurry along to my first official day at my new job. I’m already exhausted and I haven’t even started yet. Last night I ate so much food at the Yom Kippur thing that I was ready to explode. Let me put it this way: There were eight desserts, each more delicious than the last. I was a complete and utter Kimlet/Piglet.
In yesterday’s notes and posts, I spoke of the Internet – and the fact that our very own Michael Shayne had posted about his excitement regarding the stage version of Nudie Musical and the potential new label thing. And how, a mere fifteen minutes later, someone came on lambasting me. I responded to that, and that person came back and hanged himself. How did he do that? Well, he posted information he could not possibly have had without “insider” help. In other words, information which has never been made public in any way. Now, the information that he posted happened, for the most part, not to be entirely true, but that isn’t really the point. The point is, where did he get the information. Yes, how did this supposedly innocent poster get this rather detailed information? I suppose we’ll all have our theories – I most certainly have mine. The point is, his posts were designed to damage my reputation. What did or does it matter to this oaf whether or not I start another label? Why would he care? Of what concern is it of his if someone feels like taking a flyer on starting a label with me? Think about it. It simply doesn’t add up. I have responded to the oaf again, and there is nothing in my response he can refute because what he did was so obvious and transparent. Thanks to all who came in and defended me – you know how much I appreciate it. As to the oaf and the people who either supplied him with information or asked him to post it – well, karma, baby. I just sit and wait and smile contentedly for karma to rear its potent head. And, believe me, it will. I have received so many wonderful e-mails from so many wonderful people over the years, that I know that the albums I’ve produced – the winners and the losers (financially) – have brought joy to people, and that is all that matters to me. I feel only pity for people who feel the need to be negative and who only want to cause harm to people who don’t deserve it. Karma, baby – your day is coming.
My goodness, that was quite a rant. I feel ever so much better now. Let’s not waste our posting space about this junk here – but do feel free to go to the newsgroup (rec.arts.theatre.musicals) and let the oaf know what you think of him.
Well, why don’t we click on the Unseemly Button below because I must leave soon for my official first day of work.

Oh, my, I really must hie and shortly say goodbye and fly. Let me discuss this work thing, actually. I will do as much, notes-wise, as I can, but I do have to be there every day, five days a week, at nine in the morning (ah, the world of series television) – sometimes, I’ll try to write them the night before, but I simply won’t have time to do long and endless notes, as much as I enjoy doing so. I hope you’ll bear with me on this, and I hope you’ll pick up the slack with long and endless posts. We’ll try an Ask BK Day this week, and I’ll see if it’s even possible to do. I would ask for you to not load up on the questions – perhaps a limit of three to each person, how’s that?
I watched a tape of the premiere episode of The Sopranos fourth season last night and it didn’t disappoint; at least it didn’t disappoint me. I’ve decided not to wait a year for the fourth season to come out on DVD, so I shall watch the episodes as they air, which I haven’t done before.
We had several winners for our handy-dandy Unseemly Trivia Contest. Here was the question:
A flop musical
The composer’s first Broadway musical
The authors’ first Broadway musical
The director’s first Broadway musical
The male lead’s first and last Broadway musical
The authors and director would go on to work with a musical theater legend multiple times. The composer would go on to have a major career in the musical theater.
Name the musical.
Name the composer.
Name the authors
Name the director
Name the male lead.
And the answers are:
A Family Affair
John Kander
William and James Goldman
Harold Prince
Shelley Berman
Our High Winners are David Burrows, Tim Hedgepeth, Steveg, Michael Shayne, Hapgood, Mark Rothman, and JMK. And our Electronic Hat has randomly chosen JMK our Highest Winner. Congratulations to one and all and also all and one.
All right, very well, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must have my first official day at work, I must hie and fly and say goodbye, I must wend my way down Ventura Blvd. in my automobile. I do believe they have Internet access there, so I shall do my best to check in during the day. If not, I shall return early this evening, with bells on. I look charming with bells on, do you? Today’s topic of discussion: I happened to meet a psychic over the weekend (about which more later), who I found very interesting. How do you feel about such things? Do you believe in them? Have you ever gone to one or even had your fortune told by someone? Also, what do you think of karma, baby, karma? And do feel free to talk about any old thing you like as well. Post away, my pretties.

Replies: 31 Unseemly Comments

Good luck, Bruce, on your first official day of work at your new job. May you find the work both enjoyable and rewarding.
And that's all I have to say for now.
Posted by Susan Gordon @ 09/17/2002 08:29 AM PST

I can't say that I have consulted a psychic. I have, once, consulted a tarot card reader, who proved very interesting. He and I talked back and forth as he read the cards, so I cannot say just how accurate the "fortune telling" aspect was. However, he proved quite adept at using the cards as a tool for exploring with me some problems I was having at work, and we arrived at a plan of action that I undertook and worked very well. That we used the cards as a tool was perhaps the key, rather than putting total faith in a blind reading.
Years later, der Brucer and I undertook building a computer astrological program, starting with one he already had that had the basic math pretty well worked out but lousy write-ups. Der Brucer tore the program down to its roots, and then proceeded to rebuild it. I, meanwhile, gathered information from three or four advanced astrology books, and wrote out our own definitions of what each planet was doing in each sign, in each house, and in each aspect. Come to think of it, the program der Brucer used as his starting point didn't have anything to do with aspects, which is where so much of the fun lies. Lays. Whatever.
I particularly had fun making all the written parts non-gender specific, since we were going to use the program as a fundraiser at the Orange County Gay and Lesbian Pride Festival. Somehow, we got it done just in time, and the whole thing was a success. We used the program again at the Long Beach Pride Festival, with der Brucer having done some tinkering over the winter to speed the program up (and a faster printer also helped a great deal). However, the Los Angeles Christopher St. West Festival proved to be a losing proposition. We were stuck with a lousy location, and most of the crowds were (on Saturday) amazingly jaded or (on Sunday) amazingly drunk.
We had better things to do after that, the organization we'd been raising money for having undergone a change of leadership who didn't want our help, their loss. And the next year, at the CSW Festival, there were three other booths running computerized astrological forecasts. Didn't matter, der Brucer's reconfigured program was better than theirs, and I was certainly a better writer.
If I do say so myself!
Posted by S. Woody White @ 09/17/2002 08:40 AM PST

I'd like to thank all the little electronic hats who made this possible....
Well, the Northwest is "psychic central." Having moved here straight out of college from the Rocky Mountain area, I was amazed at the plethora of neon "Psychic" signs in windows up here, which I had never seen before in my previous locale. For those of you who remember my patently awful phone prank thread from several months ago, here is another: a supposedly "world famous" psychic used to advertise in a left-leaning weekly in these parts. On a semi-monthly basis I would call him, always using a different dialect, and always do the same tired, yet to me, hilarious, routine: "David?" I would say in any accent which happened to come to mind. David the psychic would respond, "Yes?" I would pause for a moment and then say, "Don't you know who this is?" He would pause for a moment and say, "No...", and I would then rejoin, "Well, I guess you're not much of a psychic then!" Ah, the carefree days of a misspent youth.
My favorite psychic story has to do with another Northwest tradition, the "channeler" (anyone remember Ramtha?). I attended a channeling session with a gentleman who channeled a spirit named "Orrin" (which for me, coming from Salt Lake City, where this is a very common Mormon name, left me wanting to giggle from the outset). Orrin spoke in a whiny, high voice, and was dispensing various and sundried pearls of wisdom about my former lives, my manifest destiny, all of my deceased relatives with whom he was communing, blah, blah, blah. I had asked several fairly specific questions which Orrin managed to answer in vague generalities (as is the wont of so many spirits, these days--really, the aether just ain't what is used to be). So, I then asked, "Orrin, what's my mother's maiden name?" Orrin departed the earthly realm rather quickly after that. ;)
Posted by JMK @ 09/17/2002 08:57 AM PST

Well, this morning there are 17 postings on The Thread, so I can see what it's all about. Of course, we realize that Mr. Blake lurks here as well. Somehow I feel violated now. Who knows, perhaps he's the one who drove me from another site because I disliked a certain musical.
Posted by Laura @ 09/17/2002 09:54 AM PST

I've always thought it would be interesting to meet a real psychic. That said, Stallone's mother strikes me as being a half-baked nincompoop.
The "psychic to the stars" also seems cheesy. My brain refuses to remember his name.
I've had some luck in my life with my dreams -- using them for guidance, to solve problems, and to provide clarity when things seemed muddled.
It is not a constant, but when it works, it works well.
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 09/17/2002 09:57 AM PST

Help!!! I tried logging on to rec.arts.theatre.musicals (with and without http and/or www) and I either get "This Page Cannot Be Displayed" or a search engine saying they can't find it. Does anyone have a url that will work so I can let this lurker know that we will defend Bruce for as long as he keeps knocking him?
Posted by William E. Lurie @ 09/17/2002 10:14 AM PST

Well, I finally was able to read the posts in question and they honestly made me laugh -- talk about transparent! Don't people like that realize that their personal agenda (or that of whoever put them up to it) is so obvious to anyone reading the message? Oh, and I see that the label who shall remain nameless has done it again -- their so-called "web exclusives" will indeed be showing up in stores, and, in all probability, at a much lower price. What a nice way to treat their customers!
Posted by Donald @ 09/17/2002 10:18 AM PST

I am a big believer in Karma. You do good and it will come back to you. (You should always do good)
I was so worried yesterday after I posted on the board to see all the negativity that person whose name I won't type anymore, but the postive was all the wonderful people who posted and said how wonderful it was that Mr. Kimmel was going to start up a new label. This has actually gotten more response than Nudie Musical making it to the stage.
The backlash from the negative post is interesting. People are so supportive of Mr. Kimmel.
BK has let the past be the past why can't they? What are they afraid of?
Posted by Michael Shayne @ 09/17/2002 10:21 AM PST

Karma is marvelous thing. While it often takes patience, it is always worth the wait.
On-topic: I had a friend who went to a psychic each and every New Year's, and tape the sessions. He would then listen to them at the end of each year. He was continuously amazed at how much truth was predicted each time. I think there are a lot of hucksters out there, but would love to believe there are specially-powered folks among us who can actually predict the future.
Posted by Philip Crosby @ 09/17/2002 10:39 AM PST

TV psychics tend to look slightly ridiculous, as far as I'm concerned.
HOWEVER, I would be the last person to dismiss out of hand the idea of a 'sixth sense', or whatever you want to call it. On my mother's side of my family, there have been people who have known things they couldn't possibly have known - people who have 'seen', with sometimes alarming clarity, events in the future - and I'm not talking about fuzzy TV psychic stuff (which I'm convinced is mostly based around clever questioning of the client) - I'm talking about relatively detailed 'visions', for want of a better word, of events that subsequently came to pass more or less in the form they'd been 'seen' (someone, for example, knew before the event that some friends of his who were away travelling would be involved in a car accident - saw it in some detail, in fact). As a family, it's not something we ever discuss - it's something that can actually be quite distressing for the people who've experienced it - but it's there, and it's real, inasmuch as I know the people involved and I believe them.
Posted by Stephen Farrow @ 09/17/2002 10:41 AM PST

William Lurie -- I sent a link to your email address. Hope it works for you.
Posted by Laura @ 09/17/2002 10:47 AM PST

Thanks Laura. That's my home e-mail and I'm at work now so I'll check it out tonight. Actually if I read it here at work I might start swearing out loud which my co-workers might not appreciate (although the things that come out of their mouths are often not to be believed either).
Posted by William E. Lurie @ 09/17/2002 11:02 AM PST

William Lurie, you can email me with your work address, if you want, and I'll send the link to your work address.
Posted by Laura @ 09/17/2002 11:38 AM PST

Thanks to Dear Reader Laura I was able to read this thread and I have only one question. Why did BK post his response under a pseudonym instead of his own name making it look like someone else was defending him whereas he was rightfully defending himself? Everything he said made a lot of sense, but it seemed to lose some plausibility when posted under another name... as if he didn't want to defend himself.
Posted by William E. Lurie @ 09/17/2002 01:07 PM PST

Thank you Dear Reader Laura for the link.
As for psychics and such, I've never been the type to buy in to such things. Karma, however...well, we can only hope so.
Posted by Jed @ 09/17/2002 01:13 PM PST

CLONE ALERT: Bruce has a clone, or at least a long lost little brother--if any of you picked up the DVD of "Monsters, Inc." today, go to the extra features and watch the documentaries and keep your eyes peeled for a Lee Unkrich. He is the spitting image of Bruce circa FNM.
Posted by JMk @ 09/17/2002 02:51 PM PST

Vis a vis "figs":
I am not the fig plucker
Nor am I the fig plucker's son
But I will pluck figs
Til the fig-plucker comes.
That's one of twelve verses in a drinking poem I learned once upon a time. As long as you could recite the poem correctly, you weren't considered "drunk."
(It also include a verse about sexy Siamese sailors solemnly sailing the seven seas...a sheet-slitter sitting upon slitted sheets...nymphlike nudes nimbly nibbling gnats knuckles...etc., etc.)
: )
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 09/17/2002 03:13 PM PST

I slit the sheet
The sheet I slit
And on the slitted sheet I sit
Posted by Navin R. Johnson @ 09/17/2002 03:39 PM PST

ONE BIG CHICKEN (Drinking game)
What You Will Need:
1) People
2) Beer (or Diet Coke for the HHW crowd)
How to Play:
Pick one person to start. This person says the first phrase.
The next person repeats the first phrase and says the second
phrase... and so on with each person saying their phrase as
well as all of the ones before.
If you mess up a phrase you drink the number of phrases you had to complete, and then start over with the first phrase. This goes on until all phrases are said without someone messing up.
The phrases are as follows:
One big chicken
Two cute ducks
Three brown bears
Four hairy running hares
Five fat females sitting, sipping scotch, and smoking cigarettes
Six sheets slit by Sam the Sheet Slitter
Seven sexy Siamese sailors sailing the seven seas
Eight echoing egotists echoing egotistical ecstasies
Nine naughty knocked up nuns navigating the Nigerian desert towards the nunnery
Ten fig pluckers plucking figs, I'm not a fig plucker or a fig
pluckers son but I'll pluck figs until the fig plucking's done.
Posted by Too much time on my hands @ 09/17/2002 03:52 PM PST

Ta-DA!
That's the one!
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 09/17/2002 04:34 PM PST

Except mine has two more verses that I won't reprint here.
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 09/17/2002 04:39 PM PST

Well, I believe in Karma too and have seen it in action many times.
We've gone from karma to psychics to tongue twisters. What next? I need to go listen to the radio show.
Let's have fun.
Posted by Kerry @ 09/17/2002 06:13 PM PST

Hi folks...I'm still here...Just thought I'd say hi. I can't talk very long...but I wanted to let you know that I am indeed still alive. I'm currently out of work but I'm alive nonetheless.
I hope you are all doing well!! I'll post more when I get the chance.
BK--hope you had a good first day at work!!
Posted by Jason @ 09/17/2002 07:42 PM PST

Funniest thing I ever saw was an eviction ntoice on a psychic's door
If the psychic was any good.. wouldn't she/he have seen this coming?
Posted by Craig @ 09/17/2002 08:06 PM PST

"Ta-DA!
That's the one!"
Posted by Ron Pulliam
Ah! There's a trivia question for all of y'all:
Who starred in the musical Ta Da!?
(I actually saw the New York production.)
Posted by William F. Orr @ 09/17/2002 08:30 PM PST

One side-effect of this entire rec.arts.theater.musicals business is that we all know about the site now. We all know where we can lurk and where we can post, and where we can have all sorts of fun!
We all need to come up with at least five different names for ourselves! We all need to post as often as we can, under all of our new names, and confuse the fried twinkies out of our new nemisis! We need to seek him out, and have wonderful fun!
Figs of the world, UNITE! We have nothing to lose but our Newtons!
(Let it never be said that I don't know how to be a team player.)
Posted by S. Woody White @ 09/17/2002 08:33 PM PST

I am home and will have plenty to say in tomorrow's notes. The reason I posted in the thread under another name was purposeful - I KNEW if it was someone trying to cause harm that they would use my name as if they were outing me (anyone with a brain knows my writing style). And, of course, he has never responded to the post where I nailed his ugly behind to the wall. Of course, how COULD he respond - he'd have to say where he got his information, wouldn't he. But enough - he was caught with his pants down and maybe he'll think twice before he's that stupid again. Then again, maybe not.
Posted by bk @ 09/17/2002 08:46 PM PST

In my experience -- and BK knows from where my experience with this sort of things comes -- they ignore the salient points that stops them in their tracks, they regroup and then they spin, spin, spin.....always deflecting attention AWAY from the issue and onto something insignificant and/or trivial.
Time will tell.
I keep hoping Haggis Slaggis, aka Renee, will post here in real time. Of course, her coming back here would make her a Fig Hag...yes? Or would that be a Fig Hig? (More like a Fig "Pig").
Posted by Ron Pulliam @ 09/17/2002 09:12 PM PST

I've never been to a psychic, but have friends who have, and they've had mixed results. I have another friend who, just a few weeks ago, had her handwriting analyzed. The person made some medical diagnoses based on how she wrote certain words. My friend said he was VERY accurate, especially about her gall bladder problems. Spooky!
Posted by George @ 09/17/2002 10:24 PM PST

Hope your first day on the job went well, BK. Looking forward to a full report!
Dear Reader Jason, we've really missed you! Hope you'll be able to post again regularly again soon.
Posted by Laura @ 09/17/2002 11:04 PM PST

Very late.
I consulted my crystal ball. Read the tealeaves and checked my horoscope before I was game to write anything at all. Thanks good ness I still don't use teabags or I would have been even longer.
I don't wish to know the future and am mostly sceptical about people who sell such services - I would think they should be altrusistic with their sharing of their "gift".
My sixth sense tells me my evening meal is ready.
Posted by Tom from OZ @ 09/18/2002 01:44 AM PST

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