February 02, 2005:
"I'M IN THE MOOD FOR CAKE"
Well, dear readers, yesterday was just one of those days that I can only describe as perfectly lovely. I donít know why, really, but everything just flowed well, I had lots of fun, I got work done, I had a lovely time with Mr. Kevin Spirtas, and I ate some yummilicious tuna pasta salad. I had no annoying phone calls, no annoying mail, I got five count them five interesting packages, and I picked up a bunch of new DVDs. That is my kind of day, frankly or even georgely. It was a fine way to start a new month. Other than that, I just sat around like so much fish, enjoying myself immensely. Or, to put it another way, I immensely enjoyed myself. My enjoyment was immense and immense was my enjoyment. I believe weíve now beat this into the ground, donít you, dear readers? I hope all of you had an equally lovely day. I will say that it got quite windy late in the evening, although I donít know what that has to do with the price of tomatoes or potatoes or Fruit Loops. One of my packages was a four CD set of Claus Ogerman music and arrangements from various albums with various artists. A bastardized two CD set was released here by Universal, but if you love Claus, the four CD set is the one to have. Itís got tracks by Jobim, and Gilberto, and Stan Getz, and Freddie Hubbard, and the great Arthur Prysock, and Hank Jones, and Michael Brecker, and Bill Evans, and Diana Krall, and Sammy Davis, Jr., and on and on and on. Itís a real treasure trove. Isnít that exciting? Isnít that just too too?
To add to my perfectly lovely day, I had a perfectly lovely evening watching two motion picture entertainments on DVD. The first motion picture entertainment was entitled The Karate Kid. Iíd only see it once in the theaters, but I remembered enjoying it very much. Time has been good to the film, and itís just as enjoyable now. The key to the film is in its two leading performances from Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita. They are so good together that even if the rest of the film faltered it would still be worth watching. Fortunately, the rest of the film doesnít falter Ė it remains the delight it always was. Elizabeth Shue is lovely, and Martin Kove is the karate instructor you love to hate. Itís expertly directed by John Avildsen and features a terrific score by Bill Conti. I started to imagine what this same film would be like if they made it today, but I had to stop imagining it before I vomited on the ground. The most refreshing thing in the film was seeing all these high school kids without cell phones and thong underwear sticking out of their low jeans. Today it would be overscored, overdirected, and overedited. In fact, Iím not even sure the story would be relevant today, since kids are picked up from schools by nannys, coddled, protected to within an inch of their lives, and regimented. The transfer is excellent Ė the film was shot in the grainy manner that all of Mr. Avildsenís films have. There is a four part ďdocumentaryĒ look back at the film, but itís just awful. They really need to get different people doing these things, because most of them are simply unwatchable.
I then watched a motion picture entertainment entitled Twentieth Century. Iíd never managed to catch up with this film until last evening. And what a complete treasure it is. John Barrymore gives one of the great comic performances of all time, and Carol Lombard is right there with him. The supporting cast could not be bettered and is filled with the kind of comic character turns that simply donít exist anymore. The script is witty and sparkling, and the direction of Mr. Howard Hawks, as always, is wonderful and precise. I canít wait for the ignorant armchair experts to start dissing the transfer. These fools and simpletons refuse to learn the facts Ė the main fact being that Columbia had a terrible flood which damaged whole or partial camera negatives. Therefore, many of their classic films have had to be reconstructed from prints and partial negatives. That said, Twentieth Century looks pretty darn good for the most part Ė there is some occasional bad damage, but nothing horrendous.
What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? Why donít we all click on the Unseemly Button below because right now I am growing weary of flitting about like a gazelle eating a cantaloupe in a gazebo.
A Gazelle Eating a Cantaloupe in a Gazebo Ė that is the title of my next novel. Speaking of birthday, Iíll be hornswoggled if we donít have another two to celebrate this very day. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, we have two count them two birthdays to celebrate this very day. So, letís put on our pointy party hats and our colored tights and pantaloons, letís break out the cheese slices and ham chunks, letís dance the Hora and the Monkey, because today is the birthday of dear reader Ben and dear reader Iris. So, first letís send a big haineshisway.com birthday cheer to dear reader Ben. On the count of three: One, two, three Ė A BIG HAINESHISWAY.COM BIRTHDAY CHEER TO DEAR READER BEN!!! Next, letís give a rousing birthday cheer to dear reader Iris. On the count of three: One, two, three: A ROUSING BIRTHDAY CHEER TO DEAR READER IRIS!!!
Is it already Wednesday? How can that be? I tell you, these days are flying by like a gazelle eating a cantaloupe in a gazebo. They are running amok, these days are.
Speaking of cake, Iím in the mood for cake. I donít have cake cravings all that often, but Iím having one now. I may have to switch over to the Cake Diet for a day or two. That diet consists of eating nothing but cake for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Itís a fine diet. I'm In the Mood For Cake - that is the title of my next novel.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must write, I must do a few errands, I must attend to a few things, and I must flit about like a gazelle eating a cantaloupe in a gazebo. Todayís topic of discussioni: Has anyone noticed that I typed the word ďdiscussioniĒ instead of discussion? ďDiscussioniĒ is, of course, Eyetalian for discussion. In any case, itís Ask BK Day, the day in which you get to ask me or any dear reader any old question you like and we get to give any old answer we like. So, letís have loads of lovely questions and loads of lovely answers and loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I dream of cake Ė for Iím in the mood for cake and there are no two or even three ways about it.