March 3, 2004

Its almost 3am. And I have to get up at 10am tomorrow to workout and meet Andy by 12 and see the Passion of Christ. But I have to tell about the strangeness of performing in Denver, Colorado.

The show went well, and the audience was great, but the high altitude here is flat out PAINFUL, and it almost killed us in the opening number and in speed test, as we huffed and puffed our way thru the number!

An exceptionally high altitude is not among the 1st things one would think of when going to Denver. I certainly didn’t- aside from deciding I should heed company management and stage management's advice and hydrate constantly.

But I though... Rockies, Skiing... cold.. fresh air and peaceful... and Denver certainly encompasses it all, but the high altitude is also very prominent and something which greatly affects most people. I felt fairly tired and slightly ill all day, though I  know Im perfectly healthy, and I wasn’t the only one.

We were all a little afraid to do the show, esp. the opening number. Everything went smoothly, thanks to our knowing how to pace ourselves, much hydration and the aid of 2 oxygen tanks on stage r and l, which we lined up for hits of at our "places" call. It was strange to use such a machine, and esp. rely on it for a show that we’ve been doing for so many nights now, and when we 1st took in the extra air I couldn’t tell a difference. I do, however, think our fill ups helped us survive the altitude, and I shall certainly always think of that when I think of Denver!

I’m just glad I’m not Millie this week. Talk about gasping for air up here! (Though I do have u.s rehearsal on Thursday)


March 5, 2004

Yesterday wiped me out in every way, though it was completely invigorating artistically- which was definitely shocking to me.

My day began at 10am when my alarm sounded and I grumbled, reaching to shut it off. I’m blaming the high altitude, but I haven’t felt so low energy  and tired in ages!

I spent the next hour trying to wake up my body and esp. voice to prepare for the massive amounts of rehearsal ahead of me, and I proved quite successful, except vocally, where belting was a challenge due to the thin air and our overheated apartment.

I was meeting Paul for scene work (our first time doing Millie and Jimmy together in about 5 months!) at noon at the theatre, and I stopped to pick up a Jamba Juice on the way.

We ran scenes a lot. We must have done each scene about 5 or 6 times, and I was pleased we were connecting more than ever before (I’m more comfortable with Mark because I’ve done it with him more).

Finally, u/s rehearsal began, and I was nervous. It all went very well, and John was v. pleased with my intentions, etc. Eric Stern was also v. pleased, and I think I have somehow mastered the art of deeper connection, without such laborious work. I used to obsess. Now I can simply revisit, and that’s beautiful.

The high altitude made the opening v. difficult, and, by the end, I was gasping for air! Everything was brilliant from there...esp. my freedom- praise God- in the Other Half and poof scene and in Graydon's office/speed test, and esp. in Act 2.

Something magical happened for me and Paul on the ledge scene in Act 2, and I felt things I’ve never felt so strongly before. Confirming for me that pure magic was happening, Diane later hugged us both saying how amazing we were and how she was crying watching! What a gift! It's those moments where even the universe gives over to the present moment on stage and somehow you’ve absolutely aware of the richness, although you're deeply connected to the scene.

We didn't finish the entire show because we didn’t have a full u/s cast and because the main purpose was to get thru all Graydon stuff for Mark because next week in Sean's vacation and our boys are splitting it. Next week will be a full u/s run thru, and I’m a little scared.

On a break between act 1 and 2, I showed Laura the various ways of falling out of the desk, and she was v. sweet. I enjoy helping her because I don’t feel as though were competing at all. She’s genuine, secure, kind and v. v. talented, and will be a totally different Millie. I think I bruised my butt demonstrating Shooops old pratt, taken from Darcie's. now I know why Shoop was so heinously black and blue and purple!!!

After u/s rehearsal we had a 10 min. break and then began Laura's put in. She did a fabulous job- so professional and solid in all areas. I was pleased for her. This rehearsal exhausted me! u/s then run thru for Laura and then only a mini break and then a show! EEK!!! No wonder I slept 8 1/2 hours and could have used another 4!!!

Diane and I had so much fun with Laura in our Priscilla girl trio tonight! Not all her costumes were finished, so she, heather and Rachel split her one track- which was kind of silly. She was great, although she was upset at herself for going up on her, "well hello, you’re new...." monologue in the Apple scene.

Something beautiful about theatre? The way people support each other. Every person on our stage and crew was taking care of, supporting and throwing energy to Laura last night, and it was so unifying and refreshing and special. They were the same when I first went on for Millie and Diane for Miss Dorothy. Its a really neat thing that I wish happened all the time!

PS Heather is now covering Miss Dorothy and Flannery, and she did a brilliant and hilarious Flannery at rehearsal today!

March 31, 2004

Last Friday I had my v. 1st u/s rehearsal for Michael Mayer, our wonderful director. We were all SO nervous about him watching us, but it turned out to be the BEST run thru ANY of us have had! And he was really pleased. I think what made it so great is that we each were able to transfer our nerves into a "balls out" performance- 100% committed, and that made for total believability and success. I only received a few notes from him...but they were FABULOUS!

1. Great awe in opening, but need to see more determination for each time I say "Not for the life of me"
2. "Unwelcome wagon" has to be REALLY harsh- as if I’m cursing at him because it is what brings him back on stage.
3. Stand on #4, closer to Graydon's desk when entering his office.
4. LOTS of bickering, more accusation at top of kitchen scene.
5. "Granny dear, mother mine..." in sink scene is NOT about Jimmy. It’s about my hands in the soapy and dirty dishwater and my saying "lemon juice" just like my grandmother- exactly what I DONT want to become!!!

I adored working with Michael, and I really am looking forward to doing it again sometime. He’s terrific and it was def. a fulfilling experience.

After rehearsal, I came home and my mum (who flew in for a few days) and I made a fruit salad and watched one of those makeover your home shows, got cleaned up and rushed out to meet 15  family members, whom I’ve never met, for dinner. It wasn’t something I was initially crazy about doing, but it turned out to be a really neat thing, and everyone was super nice. They ended up coming to the show that night and saw me as Gloria.

It was unfortunate that they came on the night John Galo called me into stage management and told me Darcie was going to be out 3 days that next week, and Id be on for Millie. None of my family can really afford to come back, but 3 of them who didn’t catch the show that night will be coming tonight- and I’m REALLY excited to have support of a few people I know!

Also coming tonight is Jamie Rocco, my amazing director and friend from Oz, Cynthia (my Glinda and Aunt Em), and Carol (my wicked witch) with her husband Jim. Im thrilled they can come support me, but I’m scared to death about doing the show again!

Last night was my first night back as Millie since Houston (in December) and the show and cast have definitely changed. It was a night of weird mishaps- not just by me. Diana is on vacation this week, so Diane and I are Miss D. and Millie together- which is a blast (as she’s my best friend here!). She was PERFECT last night! Simply wonderful!

Pam is still out ill, poor thing, so Janelle had to DOUBLE as Flannery and Muzzy (better known among our cast at FLUZZY! *laugh*)

Mark Ledbetter was out, so Erik covered his track, and of course Steven was on for Troy. On top of all that we had our assistant conductor up there for the first time in a long time, and we weren’t exactly in sync. for a few things. My "Days of Yore.." entrance was too early because the music had been behind and rushing to catch up with me, but I started rushing WITH it thinking I was behind and I ended up having to sing the line twice. HUMILIATION!!! And my earring fell off in the Other Half scene...
...so many things went crazy wrong... Joey and Michael weren’t in sync for an entrance in I Turned the Corner so we were behind a few bars and had to play catch up...
everything down to the curtain coming in onto top of Ahma (Daniel) and Ching Ho and Bun Foo!!! It was a nightmare, and I’m a little afraid to see what tonight will bring,

I just have to remember to go all out and commit 100% and not let last night mess with my head.

I believe in a loving and kind God who watches out for his children, and Im going out there on faith!

Despite the mishaps, we still got a standing ovation and it was a good show.

11:16am, and time to start my day! I think Ill work out, shower and hit the fish/flower market for a bit, then come back and nap!

Ill be sure to fill you in on the show tonight!

April 1, 2004

"You are TOO a dancer! You did v. well!"

"You have a long career ahead of you"

"When I saw the show in NY I thought, 'wow! She’s really got a lot of stamina and works really hard- I wouldn’t want to have that role!', When I saw you I thought 'how fun!' cuz it looks so easy and natural- you are Millie!"

"You sounded phenomenal"

You make lots of little girls love theatre. Everyone in the audience was like, ' I like this play!' "

Those were some of the comments I got from my wonderful supporters in the audience tonight. I guess things went well. More importantly than what they thought, was how I felt about it.

I was incredibly blessed tonight. There were 3 young girls- 14, 14 and 10- at the stage door as excited as could be, getting autographs when I came out. Getting to talk to them was such a treat, and I tried to be as nice and warm and encouraging (they want to do theatre!) as I possibly could be.

Off to rest for tomorrow's final Millie night!

April 2, 2004

If last night was great, then tonight was superb! I feel like this was my most awesome show as Millie of all 7! It was all so natural and comfortable and connected and fun for me. Doing 3 in a row has REALLY helped- continuity is one luxury u/s don’t get, so the last 3 nights were a total gift!

I was sad as I changed out of my costumes and my wigs tonight- looking at all my shoes lined up next to my (Darcie's actually) dressing table. Shoes Ill prob. never wear again.

I couldn’t bring myself to take off all my Millie makeup either, so I just took off the lipstick and cheeks, which are most dramatic, and kept the eyes and eyebrows (which must has looked silly but made me feel better!).

I suppose now is a good time to share with you all that I wont be with Millie much longer. I’ve been offered Dorothy in Sacramento Music Circus' production of Wizard of Oz this June/July, and I’m taking it- for many reasons.

1. Dorothy is one of my favorite roles and Oz is a show my heart and soul is in such tune with... I love it deeply and don’t know if Ill have another chance to play Dorothy... everyone grows up (unless of course, one's Peter Pan!).

2. It’s with my same Totos (amazing dogs I LOVE) and our wonderful director from South Bay. ANY chance to work with Jamie Rocco is one taking!

3. Music Circus holds a v. special place in my heart. Aside from it being the first place to give me my leading AEA contract and being an amazing company who produces fabulous work, they are some of the nicest, most generous and kind people in the biz, and I want to work for them as much as I can throughout my career.

4. I have gotten SO MUCH out of my experience with Millie, and I’m v. sad to be leaving. However, I’ve been feeling like its time for me to move on to the next step in my life. Staying any longer would keep me from pursuing ALL of what I want for my career- lead roles, more experiences in voiceovers (DISNEY PRINCESS>>> PLEASE!!!), film, TV...

I’ve learned and grown so much and made such wonderful friendships, and I can continue to grow here, but I also see how easy it would be for me get trapped in the comfort and security and fun of this production, labeled as an u/s forever and missing time I could spend studying acting and voice and dancing intensively, while pursuing my dreams (you cant take class on TOUR!). I feel I have to try for the next goals and take that next step, however sad it is!

Oz comes at a perfect time, as I’ll be able to do the 1st 2 weeks of LA (my hometown) and friends and family will be able to come. The week after I leave, Ill be a bridesmaid in my best friends wedding and then go straight into Oz- a fresh and exciting experience!

Already, I am missing certain things, but I trust God has opened this door for a reason, and I couldn’t be more thrilled!

That, my friends, is why I was so sad leaving the 3rd Millie performance in Seattle tonight.

I had no one at the show, but I was blessed with a standing ovation; as I was packing up my makeup, etc, I was praying I touched hearts out there.

Upon leaving the stage door, I was met by a high school gal, Cressa, and mom. Cressa is a sweetheart and an enthusiastic, aspiring actress, like so many of you wonderful readers, and she was brimming with joy and excitement when she asked for my autograph.

As Cressa talked about the show, I was reminded of myself at her age, when I was seeing my heroes- Jennifer Piech in Titanic, Andrea Rivette (Jekyll and Hyde), Sheri Sanders (Fame)... and I realized even more how special my job is. If I can be a friend, mentor, role model or source of inspiration for even ONE young kid like me, everything I work so hard for is worth it. Tonight helped me realize that even more than ever before. (so thanks Cressa *smile*)

Anyway.. I’m pretty exhausted... another bad thing about u/sing is you don’t get to build up the stamina for this kind of role, so I’m beat! Ahaha.

Off to bed. Sleep well, dear ones!

Write to Juliana at Juliana@haineshisway.com