Okay, all you writer types, I need your help with my Maid of Honor toast for my sister's wedding. Here is the first draft:
One of the best-loved children's books in the world is "The Little Prince", by Antoine de Saint-Exupery (saN-teg-zu-pa-re'). It is an allegory of love and responsibility that teaches us to honor the mystery of love and life. "Here is my secret," says the little prince: "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." The author himself observed that "Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction." It's very rare in our family for all of us to be together in the same room at the same time, so I want you guys to look around and take this moment to appreciate that tonight, you are surrounded by your family and your closest friends, people who love and support you and will be there for you when the waters become rough. I'm sure you'll get plenty of advice from them, whether you want it or not! I can tell you from experience that if you ask people "What's the secret of marriage?" you'll get a lot of diverse opinions.
I am so honored to be among this group of people, because my sister and I did not really grow up together. We became close as adults, and now it's hard to imagine that there was ever any time or distance between us. And when I first saw Amanda and Brent together, it was hard to imagine he hadn't been there all along.
Antoine de Saint-Exupery also wrote "Tell me who admires and loves you, and I will tell you who you are." I think that tells us everything we need to know about you and about all of the people in this room. Amanda and Brent, look outward together now and know that you're looking at the people who love you and admire you, and who will share their counsel and their secrets with you; but it is now your happy challenge to discover the secrets of your own marriage.
Let's all raise a glass to Amanda and Brent and toast them with these words of wisdom from Ogden Nash: To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong admit it; whenever you're right, shut up. Cheers!
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I don't like the way it starts, I think there are too many quotes with not enough to link them to a point, and I don't like the repetition between the first and third paragraphs, but I can't figure out how to fix it.
Any help or suggestions would be much appreciated.