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Author Topic: HOARY JOKES  (Read 43687 times)

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ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #300 on: June 11, 2013, 07:23:15 PM »

Jane sure goes to bed early.  She never did back when I first knew here and she was fifteen.  She could actually stay up till eight or nine back then.

This has been noticed.  Oh yes, this has been noticed.
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #301 on: June 11, 2013, 07:23:55 PM »


What did the big bucket say to the little bucket?





You look a little pail!
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ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #302 on: June 11, 2013, 07:23:58 PM »

BTW, DR Jane, I think that was one of the creepiest things I've ever read. 

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George

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #303 on: June 11, 2013, 07:24:07 PM »

11
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Voldemort is basically a middle school girl: he has a locket, a diary, a tiara, a ring, and is completely obsessed with a teenage boy.

ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #304 on: June 11, 2013, 07:24:26 PM »

I also suspect creepy stuff like that gets transmitted via Facebook every minute of every day.
« Last Edit: June 11, 2013, 07:28:36 PM by ChasSmith »
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #305 on: June 11, 2013, 07:24:39 PM »

BTW, DR Jane, I think that was one of the creepiest things I've ever read. 



give me time, just give me time....
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ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #306 on: June 11, 2013, 07:25:17 PM »

Just let the musical director of our next show go - she won't be invited back, I'm afraid.  She told us in advance that she was busy mid-month, but had no problem doing the show.  She's done one before and she most certainly knows what I expect, which is one work session prior to rehearsals and then the other stuff.  I noticed today she hadn't even responded to let me know she'd gotten all the music I'd sent six days ago - I worked so hard to get all this stuff early and be ahead of the game and not even a confirmation e-mail.  So, I had Adryan Russ e-mail her and she got back a response that she'd had guests and hadn't even opened the damn e-mail from You Send It (these files expire after about five or six days) and didn't care to print anything out and that I should do it and deliver it and that she had no time to work before the rehearsal week.  At that point I told Adryan to dismiss her immediately.  And we have the wonderful Shelly Markham to replace her so it's all good now.

Show her the door!


Show her the south end of a horse going north!
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #307 on: June 11, 2013, 07:25:47 PM »


Which side of a cheetah has the most spots?





THE OUTSIDE!
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Jennifer

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #308 on: June 11, 2013, 07:25:26 PM »

I am on FB with a West L.A. group and for the most part is is fun.  This afternoon I welcomed a new member who in response thanked me and asked how I'm doing.  He then sent me a friend request which I haven't responded to.

On FB I asked if he was being friendly or if I should know him.  I don't know him & he is much younger, and went to a different high school so why he wants to be my friend I haven't a clue.

The semi-creepy part is the message he sent me:
"HELLO JANE U CAN REMEMBER ME OK AND U CAN STAY IN CONTACT WITH ME IF U LIKE OK. IF U LIKE TO TXT LET ME KNOW I CAN GIVE U MY CELL OK. NICE TO MEET U JANE."


That is creepy. Definitely don't accept him.  Some people are creepy. While others just probably friend everyone they come into contact with. Either way you don't know him, and since he can't even spell ... well I would click ignore.
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #309 on: June 11, 2013, 07:26:43 PM »


How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas?




He felt his presents!
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #310 on: June 11, 2013, 07:27:34 PM »


What happened when the butcher backed into his meat grinder?












HE GOT A LITTLE BEHIND IN HIS WORK
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ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #311 on: June 11, 2013, 07:28:00 PM »

Addendum to my little Peckinpah outburst of a while ago --

How did I overlook Major Dundee?  With, again, the good graces of Mr. Nick Redman.

I was listening to the commentary on The Wild Bunch earlier, and I don't know if I've heard three or four more enthusiastic, knowledgeable, and passionate people talking about a film and a director.  It's remarkable.  Hey, maybe all of these are that good.  Wouldn't that be great?
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #312 on: June 11, 2013, 07:28:31 PM »


What does a vegan zombie eat?











Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains!
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Jennifer

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #313 on: June 11, 2013, 07:28:21 PM »

Jane sure goes to bed early.  She never did back when I first knew here and she was fifteen.  She could actually stay up till eight or nine back then.

I'm sure she is not actually going to bed. Probably just closing down her computer or reading. :)
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #314 on: June 11, 2013, 07:29:29 PM »

A magician was driving down the road..











then he turned into a drive way.
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ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #315 on: June 11, 2013, 07:30:04 PM »

I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 

It's whiskey and I think I'll be adding it as often as I think it needs it to stay moist. Probably check on it every other week or so.

Sorry, right you said bourbon.  What did you decide to store it in besides cheesecloth?
I haven't yet. That cake could sit out by itself for a month and be OK. But with the whiskey added, the situation gets worse. I may have a cake carrier I could use to store it in.

Be sure to line it with something or you will have bourbon stains ;)

You say 'bourbon stains' like that was a bad thing.
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #316 on: June 11, 2013, 07:30:43 PM »


What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?





Make me one with everything!
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #317 on: June 11, 2013, 07:31:21 PM »


Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?




BECAUSE IT'S POINTLESS!
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #318 on: June 11, 2013, 07:33:21 PM »

There’s two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says



‘You man the guns, I’ll drive’
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #319 on: June 11, 2013, 07:34:04 PM »

I think everybody else has pressed that  "ignore" button
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vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #320 on: June 11, 2013, 07:35:34 PM »


Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided?













Both crews were marooned.
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George

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #321 on: June 11, 2013, 07:39:12 PM »

Those are all actually very funny, Vixmom!  I'm enjoying them! :D
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Voldemort is basically a middle school girl: he has a locket, a diary, a tiara, a ring, and is completely obsessed with a teenage boy.

vixmom

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #322 on: June 11, 2013, 07:41:03 PM »

Thank you George!  I can always count on you!
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George

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #323 on: June 11, 2013, 07:40:20 PM »

And on that note (C-natural), I'm leaving.  I want to go to Costco for some gas and just to look around.

Be back later!
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ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #324 on: June 11, 2013, 07:47:53 PM »

I got involved in so many other things tonight that there's no way to properly watch AT LONG LAST LOVE now.

Tomorrow night is free.  Tomorrow night it shall be. 
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TCB

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #325 on: June 11, 2013, 07:47:35 PM »

So, I'm watching some clips of the Tony Awards Show. Can someone explain this to me?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBv8zr2y48A

It says it has been removed by its owner
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John G.

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #326 on: June 11, 2013, 07:48:13 PM »


What does a vegan zombie eat?











Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains!


I love this.
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John G.

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #327 on: June 11, 2013, 07:50:40 PM »

Just finished "Pushover," a nifty film noir with Fred MacMurray and, in her first role, Kim Novak. Really enjoyed the first five minutes, a bank robbery, in which no dialogue is used. The director, Richard Quine, seemed to be having fun.
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“Let us read, and let us dance; these two amusements will never do any harm to the world.”
― Voltaire

ChasSmith

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #328 on: June 11, 2013, 07:55:14 PM »

Just finished "Pushover," a nifty film noir with Fred MacMurray and, in her first role, Kim Novak. Really enjoyed the first five minutes, a bank robbery, in which no dialogue is used. The director, Richard Quine, seemed to be having fun.

I have it, but haven't watched it.  I shall remedy that.  Thanks, DR John G.
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Laura

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Re: HOARY JOKES
« Reply #329 on: June 11, 2013, 08:00:45 PM »


What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?





Make me one with everything!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GogjFO8GNEo
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