Haines His Way

Haines His Way => Daily Discussions => Topic started by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:27:47 AM

Title: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:27:47 AM
Well, you've read the notes, the notes were hoary and a joke, and now it is time for you to post until the hoary cows come home.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:28:21 AM
And the word of the day is: HOISE!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:28:32 AM
Hoise is like a Jerry Lewis word.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:28:52 AM
How much do I love the ability to put stuff in the notes, like today's video.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:33:00 AM
Guy goes into a bar and sits down.  Orders a drink, which the bartender brings to him along with a bowl of nuts.  Guy takes a drink, then hears, "Hey, lookin' good today."  He looks around and there's no one seated hear him and he's trying to figure out where it came from.  Takes another drink.  Hears, "Nice suit, looks really good on you."  Looks around - no one.  He's now going a little crazy so he takes another sip, then hears, "That hair cut is really perfect, you look amazing."  He calls the bartender over and says, "What's going on here - I keep hearing a voice telling me all these nice things, but I don't see who's talking."  Bartender looks at him and says, "Oh, that's the nuts, they're complimentary."
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:34:00 AM
What about those smart cars?  They're so small that I stuck out my hand to make a left turn and two of them ran up my sleeve.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 02:21:51 AM
C, E-flat, and G go into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, but we don't serve minors." So E-Flat leaves and C and G have as open 5th between them. After a few drinks the 5th is diminished and the G is out flat.
An F comes in and tries to augment the situation but is not sharp enough.
A D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying,*Excuse me, I'll just be a second"An A comes into the bar but the bartender is not convinced this relative of C is not a minor.
Then the bartender notices a B-Flat hiding at the end of the bar and exclaims, "Get out now! You're the seventh minor I've found in the bar tonight."
The E-Flat is not easily deflated, comes back to the bar the next night in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes.
The bartender who used to have a nice corporate job until his company downsized, says, "You're looking sharp tonight, come on in!
This could be a major development." This proves to be the case as the E-Flat takes off the suit and everything else and stands there au natural.Eventually C sobers up and realizes in horror he is under a rest. The C is brought to trial, found guilty of contributing to the diminution of a minor,
and is sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an upscale correctional facility.
On appeal, however, the C is found innocent of any wrong doing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 02:28:02 AM
BK - If the email you talk about was mine, I think I found the problem I was having with my settings.  Sorry to alarm you, it's all resolved, or at least I get how access is getting to my account - as silly as it's been that anyone from the civil rights case cares what I post here. 

I'll just make sure my password is more unique to here,
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 02:28:54 AM
i'll just talk about three things - the weather, everybody's wealth and politics.  :)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 02:34:02 AM
I took down some posts yesterday that seem to be inflammatory in retrospect.  Sorry if the paging got thrown off last night.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ben on June 11, 2013, 02:51:47 AM
Morning all.

That is all.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 02:53:04 AM
I must say that whoever predicted when they saw "Larry Kramer getting honorary Tony" a few weeks ago, that he'd find something to be royally upset about got their predcition coming true beyond belief.


So an ancient one-liner cut from "I Never Miss a Larry Kramer Musical" [a Bette Midler-Lost Horizon reference]

Larry Kramer walks into a bar, screams at the bar for getting in his way.

Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 02:55:18 AM
Director says to Larry Kramer, "The invisible man is here to audition." 
Larry Kramer:  "Tell him i can't see him."

I think that's Henny Youngman, circa 1045.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 02:55:53 AM
I went on a diet last week, so far i've lost seven days.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:46:09 AM
Good morning to all
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:49:30 AM
I had the opportunity to work with Henny Youngman once in the the late 70's on a Canadian TV series. The premise of the sketch was that he could make anyone a comedian. He would give the setup line and I would give the punchline. So this is what I did.

Henny: I gave my wife plastic surgery for her birthday.
Me: I cut up her credit cards.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:53:31 AM
She was only a whiskey-maker, but he loved her still.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:53:59 AM
What did the fisherman say to the card magician?
Pick a cod, any cod!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:55:04 AM
Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard?
A barber.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:56:16 AM
A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"

The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:57:05 AM
Why does Piglet smell?
Because he plays with Pooh.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:57:48 AM
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Soup.
Soup who?
Superman!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 03:58:55 AM
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Lyndon
Lyndon who?
Lyndon Bridge is falling down

Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 04:00:29 AM
A man walks into the doctor's office with a piece of lettuce hanging out of his bum.
The doc takes one look and he says, "Jeeze, it looks like we have one hell of a problem here." The guy responds "this is just the tip of the iceberg."
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 04:02:43 AM
A man opens his door and finds a snail on his front porch.
He picks it up and throws it across the street.
A year later the man opens his door and finds the same snail on his front porch.
The snail looks up and says, "What the hell was *that* all about?"
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 04:03:30 AM
Why couldn't they play cards on the ark?
Noah sat on the deck.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 04:03:51 AM
When is a door not a door?
When it's ajar.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Michael on June 11, 2013, 04:10:56 AM
And some Henny Youngman jokes


The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, "Mrs. Cohen, your check came back." Mrs. Cohen answered, "So did my arthritis!"

The Doctor says, "You'll live to be 60!" "I AM 60!" "See, what did I tell you?"

A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge say,s "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says, "Okay, let's get started."

Another bum told me, "I haven't tasted food all week." I told him, "Don't worry, it still tastes the same!"

There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.

Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 04:13:09 AM
Accidentally dropping the freshly washed and dried laundry into the dog's water dish:  priceless.         :P
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 04:47:05 AM
Good morning, all!  I am off to Toyland to edit a Jerome Moross orchestra score for his Ballet Ballad "Susanna and the Elders."

Hopefully I can get back to ROBERTA tomorrow, but the June job is primarily the Moross score.

DR Ben, I'm sorry Anthony's birthday was a really rainy day. How did it go?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:10:16 AM
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Little old lady?
Little old lady who?
Wow! I didn't know you could yodel!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ben on June 11, 2013, 05:10:21 AM
Despite the rain we had a very nice day. We had lunch at East of Eighth then strolled down 8th Avenue stopping in Rainbows and Triangles. We then went home, took a nap and then went up to 64th and Central Park West to visit friends.

After that we came home, Anthony spoke on the phone to some well wishers and then we watched

The Ginger Rogers Show (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCqj4Y9YhTw)

a pilot from 1963 for a possible weekly television outing for Miss Rogers. The pilot was never picked up. After we watched the show we realized why it wasn't picked up.

It was a quiet but very nice day.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:10:39 AM
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
leena!
leena who?
Leena little closer and I will tell you!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:11:16 AM
What time is it when an Elephant Sits on your fence?


Time to buy a new fence
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:11:37 AM
Where does a 300 lb gorilla sleep?



Anywhere he wants to
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:12:16 AM
What did the 200 lb mouse say when walking down the alleyway?


Here kitty, kitty.....
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:12:37 AM
Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don't cry, it's just a joke.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:12:51 AM
Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
Al!
Al who?
Al give you a kiss if you open this door!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:13:17 AM
Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
Dozen.
Dozen who?
Dozen anyone want to let me in?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:13:30 AM
Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Justin case you forgot me out here.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:13:55 AM
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Madame.
Madame who?
Madame foot's caught in the door!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:14:16 AM
Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the trunk, you packa the suitcase.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:14:43 AM
Will you remember me in an hour?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a day?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a week?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a month?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a year?
Yes.
I think you won't.
Yes, I will.











Knock, knock!
Who's there?
See? You've forgotten me already!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:15:25 AM
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Meow.
Meow who?
Take meow to the ballgame.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:15:32 AM
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Carmen.
Carmen who?
She'll be Carmen round the mountain when she comes.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:16:00 AM
Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Police.
Police who?
Police stop telling these awful knock, knock jokes!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:16:20 AM
knock knock
Who’s there?
Tad!
Tad who?
Tad’s all folks!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:16:58 AM
SeeSaw - that was a wonderful and clever joke!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:17:11 AM
Sorry about your laundry
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:19:35 AM
I was wondering if anybody would like to buy a lovely house on long Island  -

Only an hour from Broadway,  20 minutes to north shore or south shore beaches,

 90 minutes to the Hamptons,


Complete with  an indoor  basement wading pool

All offers considered
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:20:12 AM
Well I suppose I better go to work now
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:29:16 AM
http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190 (http://http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190)

I wonder if that worked
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Kerry on June 11, 2013, 05:29:38 AM
5:00 in the morning might be a little too early for Henny Youngman jokes.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ben on June 11, 2013, 05:30:16 AM
Sorry to hear about the basement VixMom.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:31:57 AM
http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190/saturday-night-live-save-broadway
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ben on June 11, 2013, 05:32:36 AM
http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190 (http://http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190)

I wonder if that worked

That didn't but this should

Saturday Night Light Save Broadway (http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:32:38 AM
OK that worked  and so must I..... laters!!!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 05:34:34 AM
http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190 (http://http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190)

I wonder if that worked

That didn't but this should

Saturday Night Light Save Broadway (http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190)

you clever man,  you!   :-*
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 05:43:38 AM
Good morning, all.

Great jokes this morning. Will try to see if the cobwebs of my mind have retained any to join the rest of these knee-slappers.

But off to work.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 05:53:58 AM
Good hoary morning, all.

Oy!   First, my poor aching back, and then the jokes in this jernt...
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ginny on June 11, 2013, 05:58:55 AM
Tuesday morning greetings!  Summer-y weather is here - 85 today, 90 tomorrow, and HUMID :P
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ginny on June 11, 2013, 06:01:13 AM
DR Vixmom, don't store your Vera Bradley in the basement!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ginny on June 11, 2013, 06:03:14 AM
I first heard this when then-5-year-old Robbie told it at a day camp talent show:

What does a pig put on his sunburn?








OINK-ment!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 06:12:30 AM
Greetings from Toyland!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Charles Pogue on June 11, 2013, 07:13:17 AM
TOD:

I've always been a sucker for what I call "have an accident" jokes:

Have an accident?
No, thanks, just had one.

Call me a cab!
Okay, you're a cab.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Charles Pogue on June 11, 2013, 07:19:25 AM
Disagree, BK, about the score from GIRL CRAZY being mediocre.  I like a lot of the lesser known songs like Could You Use Me, Treat Me Rough, Sam & Delilah, even Bronco Busters.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 07:24:40 AM
Such lovely new avatars from DR JANE and DR LAURA yesterday.

Prague travel vibes for DR DOUG R!

Nice gaze-bo DR GEORGE!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Kate on June 11, 2013, 07:24:27 AM
Knock Knock!
Who's There?
Doris!
Doris Who?
Doris locked, that's why I am knocking!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 07:26:39 AM
A ninety year old man married a sixteen year old girl.  A friend asked: "Aren't you afraid of heart attack on the wedding night"   The Man replies:  "If she dies - she dies."
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 07:27:55 AM
Man notices an empty seat next to a woman at BOOK OF MORMON.....asks her about it.

"Oh my husband died."

"Couldn't you bring a friend?"

"They're all at the funeral."
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 07:29:07 AM
God sneezed - I didn't know what to say to him....
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 07:29:44 AM
HA!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Kate on June 11, 2013, 07:36:40 AM
What do you call cheese that's not yours?
Nacho cheese!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Kate on June 11, 2013, 07:37:21 AM
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because: 7 8 9!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 07:44:55 AM
I'm up, I'm up - workers should be here soon.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 07:45:26 AM
I like the music of Bronco Busters, not the lyric.  Delilah I've never liked. 
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ArnoldMBrockman on June 11, 2013, 08:03:14 AM
And the word of the day is: HOISE!

And The Song Of The Day Is:  TO LIFE
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 08:02:51 AM
I just ate some scrambled eggs, Brown & Serve sausages, fresh tomato slices, and I'm on my second cup of Emeril's Big Easy Bold.  I should be rarin' to go!  But here I sit.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 08:04:14 AM
Sad Cat Diary   (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKffm2uI4dk&feature=youtu.be)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 08:07:55 AM
I know a great "Knock-Knock" joke, but I need one of you to start it!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 08:10:10 AM
I had the opportunity to work with Henny Youngman once in the the late 70's on a Canadian TV series. The premise of the sketch was that he could make anyone a comedian. He would give the setup line and I would give the punchline. So this is what I did.

Henny: I gave my wife plastic surgery for her birthday.
Me: I cut up her credit cards.

I just tried this one on my wife.

She said, "No way."

 ;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 08:11:33 AM
Sad Cat Diary   (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKffm2uI4dk&feature=youtu.be)

That's excellent, DR Ron.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 08:17:42 AM
"XXX Walked into a bar jokes":

This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. “Four bucks,” says the bartender. “Put it on my bill.”

A dog with his leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon. He sidles up to the bar and announces “I’m lookin’ fer the man who shot my paw.”

A termite walks into a bar and says “Is the bar tender here?”

Four fonts walk into a bar. The barman says “Hey get out! We don’t want your type in here!”
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 08:18:43 AM
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 08:22:22 AM
I know a great "Knock-Knock" joke, but I need one of you to start it!

Knock Knock.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 08:24:23 AM


After that we came home, Anthony spoke on the phone to some well wishers and then we watched

The Ginger Rogers Show (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCqj4Y9YhTw)

a pilot from 1963 for a possible weekly television outing for Miss Rogers. The pilot was never picked up. After we watched the show we realized why it wasn't picked up.



I turned it off after 5 minutes.    :P
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 08:35:22 AM
http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190 (http://http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190)

I wonder if that worked

That didn't but this should

Saturday Night Light Save Broadway (http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190)

 ;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 08:36:36 AM
For fans of the Hamburger Hamlet, Harry Lewis who launched the chain has passed away.
http://www.latimes.com/news/obituaries/la-me-harry-lewis-20130611,0,3634468.story
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 08:40:05 AM
Oh, wow.  Thank you for that, DR Jane. 

I would have had no idea whether he or Marilyn were still with us (I see she still is).  RIP and thanks, sir.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 08:40:20 AM
For fans of the Hamburger Hamlet, Harry Lewis who launched the chain has passed away.
http://www.latimes.com/news/obituaries/la-me-harry-lewis-20130611,0,3634468.story


 :(

I met Harry at one of Ray Court's autograph shows a few years ago.  He had a major role in one of my all time favorite movies, KEY LARGO.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 08:41:58 AM
I used to be able to rattle off jokes 1-2-3.

Now, I can't think of one.

 :-\
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 08:42:09 AM
PAGE FOUR "Lobster Bisque, Famous For This" DANCE.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 08:42:40 AM
At least, I go us to page 4.

 :D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 08:43:19 AM
I can NEVER remember jokes, either, DR Druxy.  I'll be a lousy participant today.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 08:49:37 AM
DR John G the Strawberry Tarragon Martinis were very pretty.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 08:50:19 AM
From DR Ron:
Quote
Ohh...you look really pretty at avatar size...and we can see all of you!

Thank you.  Maybe later I will see if I can change it.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 08:51:22 AM
DR George the Gazebo looks very nice even if it is somewhat blurry.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 09:06:50 AM
The Ginger Rogers Show was the pilot Ginger was shooting at 20th Century-Fox while Cynthia Pepper was shooting the "Margie" pilot....  They were in the makeup room together early one morning, when Cynthia said to her, "I think you used to know my father....."

Of course....he was Jack Pepper, Ginger's first husband.  Ginger's response was NOT reported in the TV Guide article that reported the incident.  :-X
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 09:10:18 AM
I gotta tell you.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 09:11:47 AM
The Ginger Rogers Show was the pilot Ginger was shooting at 20th Century-Fox while Cynthia Pepper was shooting the "Margie" pilot....  They were in the makeup room together early one morning, when Cynthia said to her, "I think you used to know my father....."

Of course....he was Jack Pepper, Ginger's first husband.  Ginger's response was reported in the TV Guide article that reported the incident.

Reminds me of when I was in high school, playing the lead in the Senior Play.

After the show was over, my mother's first husband came over and congratulated me.

He didn't think I knew who he was, but, of course, I did.

Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 09:12:36 AM
The Ginger Rogers Show was the pilot Ginger was shooting at 20th Century-Fox while Cynthia Pepper was shooting the "Margie" pilot....  They were in the makeup room together early one morning, when Cynthia said to her, "I think you used to know my father....."

Of course....he was Jack Pepper, Ginger's first husband.  Ginger's response was reported in the TV Guide article that reported the incident.

Reminds me of when I was in high school, playing the lead in the Senior Play.

After the show was over, my mother's first husband came over and congratulated me.

He didn't think I knew who he was, but, of course, I did.



Oh you wacky show biz people!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 09:13:28 AM
Loved the Henny Youngman video....golden....my favorite:

A panhandler came up to me and said he hadn't eaten in three days....I told him: Force yourself.   :D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 09:15:47 AM
Speaking of Henny Youngman:

I was with a publicity client in the green room of the Merv Griffin Show one night, and Youngman was one of the guests. 

He came in with a bunch of relatives, then told them to go out and sit in the audience.  "I need the laughs," he said.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 09:15:56 AM
I'm ordering a copy of Marilyn Lewis's "Marilyn, Are You Sure You Can Cook?" He Asked.

Should have some interesting stuff in it, on some level or other.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 09:18:07 AM
Loved the Henny Youngman video....golden....my favorite:

A panhandler came up to me and said he hadn't eaten in three days....I told him: Force yourself.   :D

That clip was better than the whole damned Tonys.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 09:19:50 AM
Okay, here's a joke that somebody just sent me:

A woman went to the doctor's office where she was seen by one of the younger doctors. After about four minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming as she ran down the hall.

An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she told him her story. After listening, he had her sit down and relax in another room.

The older doctor marched down the hallway back to where the young doctor was writing on his clipboard. "What the hell is the matter with you?!" the older doctor demanded. "Mrs. Terry is 71 years old, has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?"

The younger doctor continued writing and without looking up said, "Does she still have the hiccups?"
 
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 09:25:11 AM
HA!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 09:26:43 AM
Woody Allen:

"I got a job at the Folies Bergere helping the girls change their clothes....25 francs a week."

"That's not much money."

"That was all I could afford to pay."
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 09:33:41 AM
It might serve to post this little reminder once every couple of pages or so today:

In the words of BK,

We don’t allow groaning here at haineshisway.com.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 09:38:17 AM
I know a great "Knock-Knock" joke, but I need one of you to start it!

Knock Knock.


Who's there?







:D  :D  :D  :D  :D  :D  :D  :D  :D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 09:48:40 AM
Now repeat the rule about no groaning!  :D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 09:47:55 AM
HA!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 09:53:32 AM
Scientific joke:

The bartender says: We don't serve neutrinos in here.

A neutrino walks into a bar.



[An independent recreation of the experiment in the same laboratory by ICARUS found no discernible difference between the speed of a neutrino and the speed of light.]
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 09:55:25 AM
Loving the bad jokes today!     :)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: MBarnum on June 11, 2013, 09:56:09 AM
So many funny jokes today!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 10:05:19 AM
~ ~ ~ BASEMENT WATER-GO-AWAY VIBES ~ ~ ~ for DR Vixmom


~ ~ ~ BACKACHE BEGONE VIBES ~ ~ ~ for DR ChasSmith
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 10:06:16 AM
~ ~ ~ NO GROANING VIBES ~ ~ ~ for DR Ron Pulliam
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 10:08:10 AM
Several interesting-looking video links posted above, which I will have to explore later this evening after work.


Here's one more, in a science-geeky vein:
http://www.npr.org/blogs/krulwich/2013/05/17/184815141/the-little-metronome-that-wouldnt (http://www.npr.org/blogs/krulwich/2013/05/17/184815141/the-little-metronome-that-wouldnt)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: MBarnum on June 11, 2013, 10:15:19 AM
I think that I forgot to mention that I interviewed the lovely and talented Jan Englund on Sunday.

Jan (aka Jan Lowell) co-starred in my favorite 1950s juvenile delinquent film, REFORM SCHOOL GIRL.

Here she is battling bad girl Luana Anders, with Jan the one pulling the other gals hair!


(http://wrongsideoftheart.com/wp-content/gallery/stills/reform_school_girl_01.jpg)




PS: Wearing the white halter top is my dear friend Diana Darrin. Next to here, in the striped top, is B movie favorite Yvette Vickers.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: MBarnum on June 11, 2013, 10:20:04 AM
And here is Jan, along with her real life husband, actor/screewriter Mark Lowell (being restrained), in a tense scene from EMERCENCY HOSPITAL.




(http://www.moviegoods.com//Assets/product_images/1020/319004.1020.A.jpg)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 10:21:20 AM
This is one told on "The Big Bang Theory" by Sheldon as he prepared to address a group of students:

A poultry farmer was distressed because his chickens stopped laying eggs. He didn't know what to do about it, but one of his friends, a physicist, offered to help. The physicist came out to the farm, took a bunch of measurements, and went back home to analyze the data. The physicist called the farmer on the phone and said: "Okay, I have a solution for your problem, but it only works with spherical chickens in a vacuum."



If anyone gets a giggle out of this, please let me know why!

Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 10:22:31 AM
Ooh-ooh!   Page 5

Let's Dance:

(http://i254.photobucket.com/albums/hh119/RonPulliam/00203232.jpg) (http://s254.photobucket.com/user/RonPulliam/media/00203232.jpg.html)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: MBarnum on June 11, 2013, 10:25:36 AM
Jan wrote some pretty spicy novels back in the early 1960s. I read her first, titled THE YEARS OF PASSION...wow, it was good...and since it had a Hollywood based storyline, I found it particularly enjoyable. She lost some friendships after the book was published as people recognized that some of things in the book were based on them! LOL!



Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 10:40:44 AM
“A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink. The bartender replies, ‘For you, no charge.’”
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 10:50:31 AM
I just discovered this video of a radio show I did when I was in Fort Wayne (5/31).

Boy, do I look tired.  (I was)

http://afw.pegcentral.com/player.php?video=c5e36ce08b2ea135e1cbb91fb884ac4a
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 10:56:29 AM
Ha.  Very nice, DR Druxy.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 11:06:36 AM
Why Music Makes our Brains Sing...
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/09/opinion/sunday/why-music-makes-our-brain-sing.html (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/09/opinion/sunday/why-music-makes-our-brain-sing.html)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 11:07:58 AM
If anyone gets a giggle out of this, please let me know why!


Yes - because your avatar is so darned cute.     :-*
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 11:19:43 AM

A glazed Krispy Kreme doughnut, split open and stuffed with savory sloppy joe, doused in a tomato-based sauce, and sprinkled with cheese.
Just because.   This is real, people!    :P

(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/krispy_zps9edf3390.jpg)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 11:22:00 AM
Back from a three-mile jog.  I've been having some fun doing slight revisions for The Brain from Planet X for high school productions, so they're not left to their own devices for changes. 
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 11:23:15 AM
It turned into a day of finishing all the score revisions, printing new pages, and rebinding some scores, including the one for the Kern estate. Tomorrow I will finish the new pages for the vocal score, and on friday, we will print the orchestra parts.

It's time to go home. I am exhausted.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 11:31:09 AM
Very nice DR DRUXY....and I also now know more than I need to about the Habitat for Humanity.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 11:31:43 AM
Back from a three-mile jog.  I've been having some fun doing slight revisions for The Brain from Planet X for high school productions, so they're not left to their own devices for changes. 

Most appreciated by some community theatres, too, I am certain.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 11:47:55 AM
I was wondering if anybody would like to buy a lovely house on long Island  -

Only an hour from Broadway,  20 minutes to north shore or south shore beaches,

 90 minutes to the Hamptons,


Complete with  an indoor  basement wading pool

All offers considered

~~~Continued Basement Vibes for Vixmom and the Vixfamily!!~~~
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 11:53:45 AM
Nice gaze-bo DR GEORGE!

Thanks, Jack!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 12:00:55 PM
http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190/saturday-night-live-save-broadway (http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190/saturday-night-live-save-broadway)

That was funny!!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 12:01:16 PM
Sad Cat Diary   (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKffm2uI4dk&feature=youtu.be)

This was very funny, too!!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 12:03:23 PM
I can NEVER remember jokes, either, DR Druxy.  I'll be a lousy participant today.

Ditto and ditto...but I'm loving the jokes that've been posted!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 12:06:42 PM
The Ginger Rogers Show was the pilot Ginger was shooting at 20th Century-Fox while Cynthia Pepper was shooting the "Margie" pilot....  They were in the makeup room together early one morning, when Cynthia said to her, "I think you used to know my father....."

Of course....he was Jack Pepper, Ginger's first husband.  Ginger's response was NOT reported in the TV Guide article that reported the incident. :-X

Reminds me of when I was in high school, playing the lead in the Senior Play.

After the show was over, my mother's first husband came over and congratulated me.

He didn't think I knew who he was, but, of course, I did.

Barbara Walters told a story on "The View."  One day, she got into an elevator in her apartment building and a gentleman got in and Barbara said that he looked familiar, but it wasn't until later that she realized that he was her first husband!

 ;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 12:08:17 PM
DR George the Gazebo looks very nice even if it is somewhat blurry.

Thanks, Jane!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 12:13:33 PM

A glazed Krispy Kreme doughnut, split open and stuffed with savory sloppy joe, doused in a tomato-based sauce, and sprinkled with cheese.
Just because.   This is real, people!    :P

(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/krispy_zps9edf3390.jpg)

I think the burning question that's on all of our minds is: 

Would DR ChasSmith, or wouldn't he, try this?

HELL yes.

Well, I mean, once, anyway.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 12:15:49 PM
(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/rain_zpse0e09e26.jpg)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 12:18:59 PM
I just discovered this video of a radio show I did when I was in Fort Wayne (5/31).

Boy, do I look tired.  (I was)

http://afw.pegcentral.com/player.php?video=c5e36ce08b2ea135e1cbb91fb884ac4a (http://afw.pegcentral.com/player.php?video=c5e36ce08b2ea135e1cbb91fb884ac4a)

Very nice, Druxy!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 12:21:26 PM
Very nice DR DRUXY....and I also now know more than I need to about the Habitat for Humanity.

You're a better man than I, DR Jrand62.  I had to poke around and find where DR Druxy's began, and listen from there.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 12:23:22 PM
LOL....I only listened to some of that part by accident.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Laura on June 11, 2013, 12:24:05 PM
So, I'm watching some clips of the Tony Awards Show. Can someone explain this to me?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBv8zr2y48A
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 12:38:24 PM
Can someone explain this to me?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBv8zr2y48A (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBv8zr2y48A)


DR Laura - there are some things in this universe that just defy explanation.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 12:38:16 PM
So, I'm watching some clips of the Tony Awards Show. Can someone explain this to me?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBv8zr2y48A

No.

Well, we could.  But then we'd have to kill you.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Doug R on June 11, 2013, 12:50:25 PM
Glorious weather here in Prague. Unfortunately I left my tablet on the plane and so am severely restricted with internet access!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 12:51:00 PM
Unless Neil Patrick Harris was up there somewhere, DR LAURA, no it cannot be explained.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 12:51:27 PM
Two episodes of Mad Men left this season.....
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 12:52:47 PM
Page Six Bob Benson & Pete Campbell Dance.

(http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1183173/thumbs/s-MAD-MEN-BOB-PETE-large.jpg?6)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 12:55:54 PM
I still have to watch this week's episode. 

So, that'll be tonight.  MAD MEN and AT LONG LAST LOVE ..... which got here just a while ago.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 12:59:40 PM
Glorious weather here in Prague. Unfortunately I left my tablet on the plane and so am severely restricted with internet access!

Will you be able to get your tablet back, or is it lost forever??
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 01:00:12 PM
Page Six Bob Benson & Pete Campbell Dance.

(http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1183173/thumbs/s-MAD-MEN-BOB-PETE-large.jpg?6)

That was an interesting scene! ;)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:02:36 PM
Back from having a quesadilla.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 01:06:34 PM
How to make fried bubble gum:
http://gawker.com/5837469/how-to-make-fried-bubblegum-the-latest-texas-treat (http://gawker.com/5837469/how-to-make-fried-bubblegum-the-latest-texas-treat)


(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/friedbubblegum_zps5f2e5ca4.jpg)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 01:07:23 PM

It's not really bubble gum. But it's still revoltin'     :P

Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 01:08:05 PM
Will you be able to get your tablet back, or is it lost forever??
    :-\
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:18:54 PM
New things on the board: Ability to post calendar events is now working - the updated software has some weird thing where it has to be tied to a board, which it now is - if you scroll down the home page of the board you will see a calendar board - when things get added to the calendar they'll show up there - kind of pointless but that's how it works now.

The board has been pruned - you'll notice there are now a bit more than ten new archived sections for the older topics.  That, for me, is very helpful, as the board has not been pruned in over four years and there were close to a half million posts that resulted in 92 pages of topics, which is just too unwieldy - those have all been broken down into several archived topics now.

Captcha has been set to the next level of security and since that happened not one spam registration has come through.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Doug R on June 11, 2013, 01:20:06 PM
Glorious weather here in Prague. Unfortunately I left my tablet on the plane and so am severely restricted with internet access!


Will you be able to get your tablet back, or is it lost forever??

I will contact the airline.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:19:20 PM
All for you dear readers, save for the captcha part, which is for ME.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 01:27:05 PM
I still have to watch this week's episode. 

So, that'll be tonight.  MAD MEN and AT LONG LAST LOVE ..... which got here just a while ago.

I checked my Amazon account and my order for "At Long Last Love" is FINALLY marked as "Shipping Now"!! ;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 01:28:31 PM
New things on the board: Ability to post calendar events is now working - the updated software has some weird thing where it has to be tied to a board, which it now is - if you scroll down the home page of the board you will see a calendar board - when things get added to the calendar they'll show up there - kind of pointless but that's how it works now.

The board has been pruned - you'll notice there are now a bit more than ten new archived sections for the older topics.  That, for me, is very helpful, as the board has not been pruned in over four years and there were close to a half million posts that resulted in 92 pages of topics, which is just too unwieldy - those have all been broken down into several archived topics now.

Captcha has been set to the next level of security and since that happened not one spam registration has come through.

Pretty darned cool, BK!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: MBarnum on June 11, 2013, 01:30:02 PM
What would CSS (ChasSmith) do. That is my new moto.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 01:31:08 PM
Yes, thanks, BK!   
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 01:40:15 PM
New things on the board


Huzzah!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 01:42:39 PM
This is just like when they introduced the brand new Edsel.....
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 01:42:54 PM
Well ... not EXACTLY like that.....
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jrand74 on June 11, 2013, 01:43:32 PM
Off to block Angel Street Act Three, where there will be lots of kissing, and fighting, and tying people up.  Some of it is in the script.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:47:21 PM
I gotta tell you.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 01:48:36 PM
Workers are winding down - they may or may not finish today, but definitely tomorrow - the last of the painting is happening now - all of the lattice work on the patio - boy does that help.  Originally they weren't going to do it, so I offered to pay half (it wasn't much) and that did the trick.  they've been very good to me here, and have never raised the rent in eight years.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 01:48:56 PM
How much do I love the ability to put stuff in the notes, like today's video.

:)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 01:49:26 PM
Off to block Angel Street Act Three, where there will be lots of kissing, and fighting, and tying people up.  Some of it is in the script.


 :)


Many people don't know that the play's subtitle is Hogtied, Hollerin', & Hickies.





Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 01:51:56 PM
I like how the new board lets you fix a post. If you do it quickly enough, it doesn't even show that you had to go back in and edit.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 01:52:11 PM
DR Vixmom, don't store your Vera Bradley in the basement!

;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 01:58:13 PM
Sad Cat Diary   (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKffm2uI4dk&feature=youtu.be)

Very clever.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 01:59:45 PM
Oh, wow.  Thank you for that, DR Jane. 

I would have had no idea whether he or Marilyn were still with us (I see she still is).  RIP and thanks, sir.

I found it very interesting.  I had no idea he owned Kate Mantilini's.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 02:00:20 PM
For fans of the Hamburger Hamlet, Harry Lewis who launched the chain has passed away.
http://www.latimes.com/news/obituaries/la-me-harry-lewis-20130611,0,3634468.story


 :(

I met Harry at one of Ray Court's autograph shows a few years ago.  He had a major role in one of my all time favorite movies, KEY LARGO.

Next time we watch I am going to pay more attention to him.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 02:07:57 PM
This is one told on "The Big Bang Theory" by Sheldon as he prepared to address a group of students:

If anyone gets a giggle out of this, please let me know why!



;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 02:11:11 PM
Does anyone still wear a hat?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 02:10:33 PM
Glorious weather here in Prague. Unfortunately I left my tablet on the plane and so am severely restricted with internet access!

Did you call the airline?  I hope you can pick it up on your return trip.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 02:11:44 PM
Oh, and my Jerry's Deli time theory was absolutely correct.  I arrived there fifteen minutes later and got the exact booth I wanted.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 02:12:01 PM
Work, I've been told, will indeed continue tomorrow.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 02:12:36 PM
I guess the next time I'll be able to sleep in will be in Washington DC.  I am alerting the media no meetings or work before eleven-thirty.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 02:13:54 PM
Workers are winding down - they may or may not finish today, but definitely tomorrow - the last of the painting is happening now - all of the lattice work on the patio - boy does that help.  Originally they weren't going to do it, so I offered to pay half (it wasn't much) and that did the trick.  they've been very good to me here, and have never raised the rent in eight years.

You have been lucky.  I hope that doesn't change after all the work they are doing.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 02:14:33 PM
I like how the new board lets you fix a post. If you do it quickly enough, it doesn't even show that you had to go back in and edit.

I didn't know that.

I just tested with a quick modify.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 02:15:55 PM
Workers are winding down - they may or may not finish today, but definitely tomorrow - the last of the painting is happening now - all of the lattice work on the patio - boy does that help.  Originally they weren't going to do it, so I offered to pay half (it wasn't much) and that did the trick.  they've been very good to me here, and have never raised the rent in eight years.

You have been lucky.  I hope that doesn't change after all the work they are doing.

I don't think it will - they really like having me here.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 02:16:16 PM
Workers are winding down - they may or may not finish today, but definitely tomorrow - the last of the painting is happening now - all of the lattice work on the patio - boy does that help.  Originally they weren't going to do it, so I offered to pay half (it wasn't much) and that did the trick.  they've been very good to me here, and have never raised the rent in eight years.

You have been lucky.  I hope that doesn't change after all the work they are doing.

I don't think it will - they really like having me here.

Probably nice.  Good home renters are worth keeping & appreciated more, IMHO, than apartment renters.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 02:19:50 PM
Especially ones who actually take care of the house and keep it perfectly.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 02:23:21 PM
Especially ones who actually take care of the house and keep it perfectly.

AND might have a property for the landlord to take to Broadway!!

;)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 02:47:58 PM
Wicked winds, heavy rains, power flickering on and off, and thunder rumbling. I think I'm through with work for the day.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 02:48:21 PM
During lunch, I made a Whiskey Nut Cake. It had to bake for three hours.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 02:49:26 PM
Oh, wow.  Thank you for that, DR Jane. 

I would have had no idea whether he or Marilyn were still with us (I see she still is).  RIP and thanks, sir.

I found it very interesting.  I had no idea he owned Kate Mantilini's.

I'd forgotten it, but I knew it when it was new.  I'd just moved back to L.A. from the Chicago area (late '86) and went there a number of times.  I don't remember now what the food was actually like, but I do recall liking the meatloaf and the macaroni enough to have them more than once.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 02:52:49 PM
Especially ones who actually take care of the house and keep it perfectly.

Yup.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: MBarnum on June 11, 2013, 02:55:14 PM
Macaroni and meatloaf sounds awfully good!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 02:55:05 PM
Has anybody on this site ever made a fruitcake? One that you let steep in brandy for months before eating it?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 02:56:37 PM
Does anyone still wear a hat?

When it rains...sometimes.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 02:56:06 PM
Has anybody on this site ever made a fruitcake? One that you let steep in brandy for months before eating it?

No, but I'll eat the one you make and send me for the holidays.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 02:56:10 PM
Macaroni and meatloaf sounds awfully good!
Yes, it does.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 02:57:00 PM
How to make fried bubble gum:
http://gawker.com/5837469/how-to-make-fried-bubblegum-the-latest-texas-treat (http://gawker.com/5837469/how-to-make-fried-bubblegum-the-latest-texas-treat)


(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/friedbubblegum_zps5f2e5ca4.jpg)

Thanks. Texas is now the butt of the hoariest joke on this board today!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Druxy on June 11, 2013, 03:01:44 PM
THIS WAS JUST SENT TO ME:



NEW YORK-Saying he could no longer stand idly by  while a vital part of American culture is lost forever, activist and  Broadway producer Mel Brooks has founded a private nonprofit  organization dedicated to preserving the word  "schmuck."
 
An  emotional Brooks stopped short of kvetching at a schmuck fundraiser  Monday.
 
"Schmuck  is dying," a sober Brooks said during a 2,000-person rally held in  his hometown of Williamsburg, Brooklyn Monday. "For many of us,  saying 'schmuck' is a way of life. Yet when I walk down the street  and see people behaving in foolish, pathetic, or otherwise schmucky  ways, I hear only the words 'prick' and 'douche bag.' I just shake  my head and think, 'I don't want to live in a world like  this.'"
 
The  nonprofit, Schmucks For Schmuck, has compiled  schmuck-related data from the past 80 years and conducted its own  independent research on contemporary "schmuck" usage. According to  Brooks, the statistics are frightening: Utterances of the word  "schmuck" have declined every year since its peak in 1951, and in  2006, the word was spoken a mere 28 times-17 of these times by  Brooks himself. The study indicates that today, when faced with a  situation in which one can use a targeted or self-deprecating insult  to convey a general feeling of disgust, people are 50 times more  likely to use the word "jerk" than "schmuck," 100 times more likely  to use "dick," and 15,000 times more likely to use "fucking  asshole."
 
Perhaps  more startling, only 23 percent of men know what schmuck means, and  only 1.2 percent of these men are under the age of 78. If such  trends continue, Brooks estimates that by 2015, such lesser-used  terms as "imbecile," "dummy," "schlub," and "contemptible  ne'er-do-well" will all surpass schmuck, which is projected to  completely disappear by the year 2020 or whenever Brooks  dies.
 
 
"We  must save this word!" Brooks said to thunderous applause as those in  attendance began chanting "Schmuck! Schmuck! Schmuck!" "How will we  be able to charmingly describe someone who acts in an inappropriate  manner? Especially given the tragic loss of the word 'schmegeggie'  in 2001. So I urge you: Tonight, when you get home, please, call up  your family, your friends, your loved ones, and tell them they're a  bunch of schmucks."
 
Hundreds  turned out at a Boca Raton, FL demonstration to show their support  for the dying word.
 
"I've  never told anyone this before," Brooks added, choking back tears,  "but my father was a schmuck."
 
The  foundation has already raised more than $20 million, thanks to  donations from supporters such as Jackie Mason, Albert  Brooks, the Schtupp Institute, Sen. Russ Feingold (D-WI),  and the Henny Youngman Endowment for the Preservation of Schmekel.  The money will go toward projects aimed at reintegrating "schmuck"  into the English lexicon, including billboards and flyers plastered  with the word "schmuck," the upcoming 5K Schlep for  Schmuck Awareness, and a new Mel Brooks film<  /SPAN>.
 
"The  world cannot afford to lose this valuable and versatile word,"  Brooks told reporters during a charity auction in Manhattan's Upper  West Side Tuesday, where attendees bid for the chance to have a  private lunch with Brooks and repeatedly call him a schmuck. "You  can be a poor schmuck, a lazy schmuck, a dumb schmuck, or just a  plain old schmuck. A group of people can be collectively referred to  as schmucks. You can call someone a schmuck, and you can be called a  schmuck. You can even call yourself a schmuck." Plus, it's just so  fun to say, Brooks added. "Schmuck."
 
Many  of the foundation's volunteers say they share Brooks' passion for  the word "schmuck," as well as his outrage that it is slowly  disappearing from everyday use. They claim that if they do not act  now, the trend could create a snowball effect.
"Today it's  schmuck, tomorrow it might be toochis," said SFS volunteer Harry  Steinbergmann, 82. "What's next, schlemiel? Putz?  Yol? Schlimazel?"
 

Steinbergmann went on to classify this scenario as  farcockte
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:04:11 PM
Has anybody on this site ever made a fruitcake? One that you let steep in brandy for months before eating it?

I would if my mother's recipe hadn't been lost.  It still sadden's me the recipe was given to my sister who didn't cook instead of to me.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:04:40 PM
DR Doug, do you make a fruitcake?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:05:16 PM
Hmmm, I'm trying to remember if my mother used brandy or bourbon.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 03:05:07 PM
Glorious weather here in Prague. Unfortunately I left my tablet on the plane and so am severely restricted with internet access!


Will you be able to get your tablet back, or is it lost forever??

I will contact the airline.
Best of luck with that. Hope the rest of the trip is better.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 03:07:37 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 03:10:42 PM

A glazed Krispy Kreme doughnut, split open and stuffed with savory sloppy joe, doused in a tomato-based sauce, and sprinkled with cheese.
Just because.   This is real, people!    :P

(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/krispy_zps9edf3390.jpg)

I think the burning question that's on all of our minds is: 

Would DR ChasSmith, or wouldn't he, try this?

HELL yes.

Well, I mean, once, anyway.

I'm with ya. At least once.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 03:23:39 PM
How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

By the footprint in the cheesecake.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 03:25:05 PM
I would not go anywhere near that Krispy Kreme thing.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 03:25:17 PM
I gotta tell you.  But I won't.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 03:25:27 PM
Because I'm nice.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 03:27:58 PM
Calendar looks fine!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:37:41 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:40:29 PM
People always ask why I finish books chosen for my book group when I'm not enjoying the book.  Today was a perfect example.  While I struggled to read all of the book the discussion was very interesting.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Cillaliz on June 11, 2013, 03:42:07 PM
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?

Knock Knock
Who's there ?
Banana
Banana who?

Knock Knock
WHO'S THERE?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say Banana
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ron Pulliam on June 11, 2013, 03:42:20 PM
People always ask why I finish books chosen for my book group when I'm not enjoying the book.  Today was a perfect example.  While I struggled to read all of the book the discussion was very interesting.

Did it make you want to re-read the book?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 03:43:39 PM
Has anybody on this site ever made a fruitcake? One that you let steep in brandy for months before eating it?

I did, back in the 1970s. I have somewhere here a great recipe.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 03:49:59 PM
Apropos of nothing...

Last night I was revisiting The Wild Bunch a little bit.  It's not a film I've always loved, but it's grown on me.  I was watching the documentaries, especially enjoying Mr. Nick Redman's participation, and though I've never been a Peckinpah fanatic I looked to see what else I have here to get into.

Straw Dogs, of course -- twice -- the Criterion and the UK DVD.  Ride the High Country, which I'd watched on someone's recommendation purely for being a good western.  Then I was reminded that the rather strange Ludlum novel (or is it the adaptation that's strange?) The Osterman Weekend was Peckinpah's last film.  Finally, The Getaway, with Steve McQueen and Ali MacGraw.

The wonderful part of all this was finding Mr. Nick Redman's participation on every one of these, so he is obviously quite the Peckinpah go-to guy.  I wonder how much more of this is out there, because I want it all.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:53:11 PM
People always ask why I finish books chosen for my book group when I'm not enjoying the book.  Today was a perfect example.  While I struggled to read all of the book the discussion was very interesting.

Did it make you want to re-read the book?

NO WAY!!!! 
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Cillaliz on June 11, 2013, 03:54:48 PM
Vet called with Callie's results.  She still has high calcium levels, but she always has had.  Interestingly enough, I just read online of people thinking there's a connection between lactulose and high calcium.  She also has high cholesterol. That may be because she just ate before we went to the vet.   Anyway, if I want more tests to figure out the calcium, I can do it.  Since she's been that way for at least 8 1/2 years, I don't think it's worth messing with
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:54:01 PM
DR John G I forgot to ask if it is a light or dark fruit cake.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Cillaliz on June 11, 2013, 03:55:01 PM
Other than that, she's got good health.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 03:56:42 PM
Other than that, she's got good health.

Which is always great news.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ginny on June 11, 2013, 03:56:47 PM
People always ask why I finish books chosen for my book group when I'm not enjoying the book.  Today was a perfect example.  While I struggled to read all of the book the discussion was very interesting.

DR Jane, my group often has better discussions of the books we dislike than we do of the ones we like.  Will you tell us the title of today's book?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 03:57:12 PM
  Since she's been that way for at least 8 1/2 years, I don't think it's worth messing with

LOL-Understandable.

How long has she been on lactulose?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 03:57:56 PM
I'll have you all know I just unjammed the ice-maker in my fridge.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 04:01:29 PM
People always ask why I finish books chosen for my book group when I'm not enjoying the book.  Today was a perfect example.  While I struggled to read all of the book the discussion was very interesting.

DR Jane, my group often has better discussions of the books we dislike than we do of the ones we like.  Will you tell us the title of today's book?

That is also the case with us.

The woman who chose "Desert Queen" loved every minute of reading the 400+ pages of this book about Gertrude Bell.  I wasn't the only one who felt like I was reading a history book with too much detail about everything.  For anyone greatly interested in the Middle East this is an excellent book.  Gertrude Bell was a fascinating woman, especially for her time, and I felt the book didn't do her justice since I found the book rather boring.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 04:04:28 PM
I'll have you all know I just unjammed the ice-maker in my fridge.

Good for you.  Now please come fix our dishwasher.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jennifer on June 11, 2013, 04:04:55 PM

A glazed Krispy Kreme doughnut, split open and stuffed with savory sloppy joe, doused in a tomato-based sauce, and sprinkled with cheese.
Just because.   This is real, people!    :P

(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/krispy_zps9edf3390.jpg)

I think the burning question that's on all of our minds is: 

Would DR ChasSmith, or wouldn't he, try this?

HELL yes.

Well, I mean, once, anyway.

I'm with ya. At least once.

They were talking about this on Live with Kelly & Michael. It sounded disgusting when Kelly was describing it. But from the picture it hardly looks like a donut and looks more like a bun.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ginny on June 11, 2013, 04:06:02 PM
Oh, we read Desert Queen a while ago.  Mary Doria Russell's Dreamers of the Day covers a lot of the same material in a much more entertaining fashion.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 04:11:36 PM
THIS WAS JUST SENT TO ME:



NEW YORK-Saying he could no longer stand idly by  while a vital part of American culture is lost forever, activist and  Broadway producer Mel Brooks has founded a private nonprofit  organization dedicated to preserving the word  "schmuck."
 
An  emotional Brooks stopped short of kvetching at a schmuck fundraiser  Monday.
 
"Schmuck  is dying," a sober Brooks said during a 2,000-person rally held in  his hometown of Williamsburg, Brooklyn Monday. "For many of us,  saying 'schmuck' is a way of life. Yet when I walk down the street  and see people behaving in foolish, pathetic, or otherwise schmucky  ways, I hear only the words 'prick' and 'douche bag.' I just shake  my head and think, 'I don't want to live in a world like  this.'"
 
The  nonprofit, Schmucks For Schmuck, has compiled  schmuck-related data from the past 80 years and conducted its own  independent research on contemporary "schmuck" usage. According to  Brooks, the statistics are frightening: Utterances of the word  "schmuck" have declined every year since its peak in 1951, and in  2006, the word was spoken a mere 28 times-17 of these times by  Brooks himself. The study indicates that today, when faced with a  situation in which one can use a targeted or self-deprecating insult  to convey a general feeling of disgust, people are 50 times more  likely to use the word "jerk" than "schmuck," 100 times more likely  to use "dick," and 15,000 times more likely to use "fucking  asshole."
 
Perhaps  more startling, only 23 percent of men know what schmuck means, and  only 1.2 percent of these men are under the age of 78. If such  trends continue, Brooks estimates that by 2015, such lesser-used  terms as "imbecile," "dummy," "schlub," and "contemptible  ne'er-do-well" will all surpass schmuck, which is projected to  completely disappear by the year 2020 or whenever Brooks  dies.
 
 
"We  must save this word!" Brooks said to thunderous applause as those in  attendance began chanting "Schmuck! Schmuck! Schmuck!" "How will we  be able to charmingly describe someone who acts in an inappropriate  manner? Especially given the tragic loss of the word 'schmegeggie'  in 2001. So I urge you: Tonight, when you get home, please, call up  your family, your friends, your loved ones, and tell them they're a  bunch of schmucks."
 
Hundreds  turned out at a Boca Raton, FL demonstration to show their support  for the dying word.
 
"I've  never told anyone this before," Brooks added, choking back tears,  "but my father was a schmuck."
 
The  foundation has already raised more than $20 million, thanks to  donations from supporters such as Jackie Mason, Albert  Brooks, the Schtupp Institute, Sen. Russ Feingold (D-WI),  and the Henny Youngman Endowment for the Preservation of Schmekel.  The money will go toward projects aimed at reintegrating "schmuck"  into the English lexicon, including billboards and flyers plastered  with the word "schmuck," the upcoming 5K Schlep for  Schmuck Awareness, and a new Mel Brooks film<  /SPAN>.
 
"The  world cannot afford to lose this valuable and versatile word,"  Brooks told reporters during a charity auction in Manhattan's Upper  West Side Tuesday, where attendees bid for the chance to have a  private lunch with Brooks and repeatedly call him a schmuck. "You  can be a poor schmuck, a lazy schmuck, a dumb schmuck, or just a  plain old schmuck. A group of people can be collectively referred to  as schmucks. You can call someone a schmuck, and you can be called a  schmuck. You can even call yourself a schmuck." Plus, it's just so  fun to say, Brooks added. "Schmuck."
 
Many  of the foundation's volunteers say they share Brooks' passion for  the word "schmuck," as well as his outrage that it is slowly  disappearing from everyday use. They claim that if they do not act  now, the trend could create a snowball effect.
"Today it's  schmuck, tomorrow it might be toochis," said SFS volunteer Harry  Steinbergmann, 82. "What's next, schlemiel? Putz?  Yol? Schlimazel?"
 

Steinbergmann went on to classify this scenario as  farcockte

FUNNY!!  This would probably make a great audition monologue! :D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ginny on June 11, 2013, 04:12:04 PM
I hear thunder...
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 04:27:33 PM
http://www.hulu.com/watch/52190/saturday-night-live-save-broadway


That looks just like the chancelier the first time I saw PHANTOM.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 04:27:38 PM
Oh, we read Desert Queen a while ago.  Mary Doria Russell's Dreamers of the Day covers a lot of the same material in a much more entertaining fashion.

Thank you!!!  For months I've been trying to remember the name of the book (Dreamers).
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 04:30:39 PM
THIS WAS JUST SENT TO ME:



NEW YORK-Saying he could no longer stand idly by  while a vital part of American culture is lost forever, activist and  Broadway producer Mel Brooks has founded a private nonprofit  organization dedicated to preserving the word  "schmuck."
 
An  emotional Brooks stopped short of kvetching at a schmuck fundraiser  Monday.
 
<SNIP>

FUNNY!!  This would probably make a great audition monologue! :D

But Druxy, it looks like what you were sent was missing the last paragraph (http://www.theonion.com/articles/mel-brooks-starts-nonprofit-foundation-to-save-wor,2316/):
 
Quote
Brooks will be appearing at Brooklyn's Francis Scott Key Junior High on Nov. 12 to give an informal lecture about his experiences using the word "schmuck," and build grassroots support among a key group of young Americans by explaining that "schmuck" is a Yiddish term for the foreskin on the head of a penis. In addition, he has hinted at the possibility of a reunion with longtime comedy partner Gene Wilder, during which the two will call each other schmucks.

Here's a picture:

(http://media.theonion.com/images/articles/article/2316/Mel-Brooks_jpg_600x1000_q85.jpg)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 04:32:37 PM
And here's another:

(http://media.theonion.com/images/articles/article/2316/Mel-Brooks-Jump_jpg_600x1000_q85.jpg)

;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 04:43:02 PM
All this schmuck stuff is funny.  I know people who promote not using the word as it is offensive.  Really, when you think of the definition I understand that.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 04:49:11 PM
Well, I just had a deeelightful phone call from someone I dearly love and never see enough of. We had a scintillating conversation and I am feeling very happy tht it occurred.

I am now going to turn off the AC since it's cold enough in here to hang meat, and read a bit,
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 04:50:04 PM
I hear thunder...

We're having on and off rain all week.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 04:53:48 PM
Well, I just had a deeelightful phone call from someone I dearly love and never see enough of. We had a scintillating conversation and I am feeling very happy tht it occurred.


Awww, nice.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 04:55:58 PM
Wicked winds, heavy rains, power flickering on and off, and thunder rumbling. I think I'm through with work for the day.


Wow. What's it like outside?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 04:57:48 PM
And here is Jan, along with her real life husband, actor/screewriter Mark Lowell (being restrained), in a tense scene from EMERCENCY HOSPITAL.




(http://www.moviegoods.com//Assets/product_images/1020/319004.1020.A.jpg)


The true sign of a happy marriage!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 05:01:33 PM
This photo brings to mind the semi-creepy experience I'm having.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 05:02:02 PM
Well, I just had a deeelightful phone call from someone I dearly love and never see enough of. We had a scintillating conversation and I am feeling very happy tht it occurred.

I am now going to turn off the AC since it's cold enough in here to hang meat, and read a bit,

Hanging Meat - that's the title of my next novel.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 05:02:17 PM
I gotta tell you.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 05:02:23 PM
But I won't.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 05:02:33 PM
I don't think I'll do the second jog.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 05:03:41 PM
I am on hold with the bank.  I have of this day finally canceled all services from our previous hosting company, and now I'm going to ensure that no further payments can be removed from my account by putting a permanent stop payment on anything from their company.  Hoo and ray.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 05:04:28 PM
I am on FB with a West L.A. group and for the most part is is fun.  This afternoon I welcomed a new member who in response thanked me and asked how I'm doing.  He then sent me a friend request which I haven't responded to.

On FB I asked if he was being friendly or if I should know him.  I don't know him & he is much younger, and went to a different high school so why he wants to be my friend I haven't a clue.

The semi-creepy part is the message he sent me:
"HELLO JANE U CAN REMEMBER ME OK AND U CAN STAY IN CONTACT WITH ME IF U LIKE OK. IF U LIKE TO TXT LET ME KNOW I CAN GIVE U MY CELL OK. NICE TO MEET U JANE."
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 05:04:56 PM
I am on hold with the bank.  I have of this day finally canceled all services from our previous hosting company, and now I'm going to ensure that no further payments can be removed from my account by putting a permanent stop payment on anything from their company.  Hoo and ray.

Hoo and ray!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 05:07:12 PM
it's cold enough in here to hang meat, and read a bit,


But not necessarily in that order.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 05:08:04 PM
That is a bit creepy, DR Jane.


I am reticent. Oh yes, I am reticent.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: singdaw on June 11, 2013, 05:08:56 PM
DR George's gazebo makes me think of a certain footbridge.  Ye gods!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Ginny on June 11, 2013, 05:10:25 PM
Nice about your phone call, DR Elmore!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 05:11:15 PM
That is a bit creepy, DR Jane.


I am reticent. Oh yes, I am reticent.

I know.  I'm friends with the person who hosts the page and I let her know.  I'm sure he will be watched carefully.  I hope I don't have to block him.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 05:17:15 PM
I am on hold with the bank.  I have of this day finally canceled all services from our previous hosting company, and now I'm going to ensure that no further payments can be removed from my account by putting a permanent stop payment on anything from their company.  Hoo and ray.

End that bill now! I love this new site.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 05:19:31 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 

It's whiskey and I think I'll be adding it as often as I think it needs it to stay moist. Probably check on it every other week or so.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 05:19:58 PM
I am on FB with a West L.A. group and for the most part is is fun.  This afternoon I welcomed a new member who in response thanked me and asked how I'm doing.  He then sent me a friend request which I haven't responded to.

On FB I asked if he was being friendly or if I should know him.  I don't know him & he is much younger, and went to a different high school so why he wants to be my friend I haven't a clue.

The semi-creepy part is the message he sent me:
"HELLO JANE U CAN REMEMBER ME OK AND U CAN STAY IN CONTACT WITH ME IF U LIKE OK. IF U LIKE TO TXT LET ME KNOW I CAN GIVE U MY CELL OK. NICE TO MEET U JANE."


On the Miami University Theatre alumni board on Facebook, there someone who claims to gave been in summer theatre with me, but who hides behind a pseudonym and refuses to tell me who he is. He may think he's cute. I think he's a horse's ass.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 05:21:34 PM
Other than that, she's got good health.

Hoo and ray!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 05:23:49 PM
Well, I just had a deeelightful phone call from someone I dearly love and never see enough of. We had a scintillating conversation and I am feeling very happy tht it occurred.

I am now going to turn off the AC since it's cold enough in here to hang meat, and read a bit,

Congrats on the call. Not on the meat locker.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 05:24:22 PM
Scary stuff, Jane.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 05:29:08 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 

It's whiskey and I think I'll be adding it as often as I think it needs it to stay moist. Probably check on it every other week or so.

Sorry, right you said bourbon.  What did you decide to store it in besides cheesecloth?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 05:29:56 PM
Scary stuff, Jane.

I haven't mentioned it to Keith yet since he is playing a computer game. 
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 05:33:43 PM
I was wrong, Keith is doing genealogy not playing a game.  I showed him the entire conversation and the private message I received.  His reaction was my initial one, he laughed out loud.  But it is creepy.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 05:34:35 PM
Good news about Callie, DR cillaliz!

I got my Region 1 copy of Kenneth Branagh's interesting film of Mozart's THE MAGIC FLUTE today. My friend Ben Davis is the Papageno.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 05:53:36 PM
Other than that, she's got good health.

Which is always great news.

Agreed!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 05:53:51 PM
I am on hold with the bank.  I have of this day finally canceled all services from our previous hosting company, and now I'm going to ensure that no further payments can be removed from my account by putting a permanent stop payment on anything from their company.  Hoo and ray.

End that bill now! I love this new site.

Ditto and Ditto!!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 06:01:12 PM
I was wrong, Keith is doing genealogy not playing a game.  I showed him the entire conversation and the private message I received.  His reaction was my initial one, he laughed out loud.  But it is creepy.

I get things like that every once in a great while...they're not really creepy (to me).  I just ignore them and never think about them again.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 06:05:23 PM
I was wrong, Keith is doing genealogy not playing a game.  I showed him the entire conversation and the private message I received.  His reaction was my initial one, he laughed out loud.  But it is creepy.

I get things like that every once in a great while...they're not really creepy (to me).  I just ignore them and never think about them again.

Interesting. That was a first for me.  I went to "ignore" his invite and found I can only "hide" it.  It says the person will never know.  I hope that doesn't mean I will continue to show as "pending" forever.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 06:06:28 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 

It's whiskey and I think I'll be adding it as often as I think it needs it to stay moist. Probably check on it every other week or so.

Sorry, right you said bourbon.  What did you decide to store it in besides cheesecloth?
I haven't yet. That cake could sit out by itself for a month and be OK. But with the whiskey added, the situation gets worse. I may have a cake carrier I could use to store it in.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 06:06:50 PM
Ten!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 06:07:59 PM
Great pix today, MBarnum.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 06:21:36 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 

It's whiskey and I think I'll be adding it as often as I think it needs it to stay moist. Probably check on it every other week or so.

Sorry, right you said bourbon.  What did you decide to store it in besides cheesecloth?
I haven't yet. That cake could sit out by itself for a month and be OK. But with the whiskey added, the situation gets worse. I may have a cake carrier I could use to store it in.

Be sure to line it with something or you will have bourbon stains ;)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 06:41:00 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 

It's whiskey and I think I'll be adding it as often as I think it needs it to stay moist. Probably check on it every other week or so.

Sorry, right you said bourbon.  What did you decide to store it in besides cheesecloth?
I haven't yet. That cake could sit out by itself for a month and be OK. But with the whiskey added, the situation gets worse. I may have a cake carrier I could use to store it in.

Be sure to line it with something or you will have bourbon stains ;)
It's plastic. It's like a big old Tupperware. I just don't know how airtight it is. Have to find it first, too.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 06:43:23 PM
How airtight are the fruitcake tins?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 06:50:15 PM

A glazed Krispy Kreme doughnut, split open and stuffed with savory sloppy joe, doused in a tomato-based sauce, and sprinkled with cheese.
Just because.   This is real, people!    :P

(http://i1282.photobucket.com/albums/a532/singdaw1/krispy_zps9edf3390.jpg)

I think the burning question that's on all of our minds is: 

Would DR ChasSmith, or wouldn't he, try this?

HELL yes.

Well, I mean, once, anyway.


No, the burning question is WHERE is Chicken Charlies  and how late does he stay open
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 06:50:47 PM
Just let the musical director of our next show go - she won't be invited back, I'm afraid.  She told us in advance that she was busy mid-month, but had no problem doing the show.  She's done one before and she most certainly knows what I expect, which is one work session prior to rehearsals and then the other stuff.  I noticed today she hadn't even responded to let me know she'd gotten all the music I'd sent six days ago - I worked so hard to get all this stuff early and be ahead of the game and not even a confirmation e-mail.  So, I had Adryan Russ e-mail her and she got back a response that she'd had guests and hadn't even opened the damn e-mail from You Send It (these files expire after about five or six days) and didn't care to print anything out and that I should do it and deliver it and that she had no time to work before the rehearsal week.  At that point I told Adryan to dismiss her immediately.  And we have the wonderful Shelly Markham to replace her so it's all good now.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 06:50:58 PM
I don't think I'll do a second jog.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 06:52:03 PM
There have been contentious things in this day and I'm tired of them, frankly.  I don't like contentious, and I don't like negativity even more.  All I can say is - watch out.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 06:52:10 PM
I gotta tell you.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 06:52:17 PM
But I won't.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 06:54:50 PM
Off to block Angel Street Act Three, where there will be lots of kissing, and fighting, and tying people up.  Some of it is in the script.

 :D :D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: elmore3003 on June 11, 2013, 06:56:16 PM
Just let the musical director of our next show go - she won't be invited back, I'm afraid.  She told us in advance that she was busy mid-month, but had no problem doing the show.  She's done one before and she most certainly knows what I expect, which is one work session prior to rehearsals and then the other stuff.  I noticed today she hadn't even responded to let me know she'd gotten all the music I'd sent six days ago - I worked so hard to get all this stuff early and be ahead of the game and not even a confirmation e-mail.  So, I had Adryan Russ e-mail her and she got back a response that she'd had guests and hadn't even opened the damn e-mail from You Send It (these files expire after about five or six days) and didn't care to print anything out and that I should do it and deliver it and that she had no time to work before the rehearsal week.  At that point I told Adryan to dismiss her immediately.  And we have the wonderful Shelly Markham to replace her so it's all good now.

Show her the door!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 07:01:57 PM
Bruce I just read your tactful comment on FB regarding the change of director.  It was funny reading it after your comments here.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 07:01:29 PM
The door has been shown and closed permanently to this young lady.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 07:01:54 PM
I always try to be tactful on Facebook - here, not so much :)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:03:03 PM
Well, I just had a deeelightful phone call from someone I dearly love and never see enough of. We had a scintillating conversation and I am feeling very happy tht it occurred.

I am now going to turn off the AC since it's cold enough in here to hang meat, and read a bit,

hmmm I don't remember calling today.....
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 07:04:23 PM
'night
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jane on June 11, 2013, 07:04:39 PM
I always try to be tactful on Facebook - here, not so much :)

;D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 07:05:15 PM
Jane sure goes to bed early.  She never did back when I first knew here and she was fifteen.  She could actually stay up till eight or nine back then.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 07:17:31 PM
I always try to be tactful on Facebook - here, not so much :)
No need to be. And good for you.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 07:18:26 PM
And here she is, Miss Whiskey Nut Cake 2013.

(http://www.savorsa.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/whiskey-nut-cake.jpg)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:19:44 PM

what do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?

















A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:20:36 PM

What does a ghost wear when it's raining outside?






Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooots!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:21:10 PM

Why is there no gambling in Africa?





Too many Cheetahs!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:21:46 PM

What do you call a fish with no eye?






Fssshh
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:22:18 PM

What did the fish say when he ran into the wall?





Dam.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:23:08 PM
Two atoms are walking down the street together. The first atom turns and says, "Hey, you just stole an electron from me!"

"Are you sure?" asks the second atom.

To which the first atom replies, "Yeah, I'm positive!"
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 07:23:15 PM
I don't think I'll do a second jog.

What about a third jog?  You could do that instead.
 
;)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:23:15 PM
Jane sure goes to bed early.  She never did back when I first knew here and she was fifteen.  She could actually stay up till eight or nine back then.

This has been noticed.  Oh yes, this has been noticed.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:23:55 PM

What did the big bucket say to the little bucket?





You look a little pail!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:23:58 PM
BTW, DR Jane, I think that was one of the creepiest things I've ever read. 

Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 07:24:07 PM
11
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:24:26 PM
I also suspect creepy stuff like that gets transmitted via Facebook every minute of every day.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:24:39 PM
BTW, DR Jane, I think that was one of the creepiest things I've ever read. 



give me time, just give me time....
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:25:17 PM
Just let the musical director of our next show go - she won't be invited back, I'm afraid.  She told us in advance that she was busy mid-month, but had no problem doing the show.  She's done one before and she most certainly knows what I expect, which is one work session prior to rehearsals and then the other stuff.  I noticed today she hadn't even responded to let me know she'd gotten all the music I'd sent six days ago - I worked so hard to get all this stuff early and be ahead of the game and not even a confirmation e-mail.  So, I had Adryan Russ e-mail her and she got back a response that she'd had guests and hadn't even opened the damn e-mail from You Send It (these files expire after about five or six days) and didn't care to print anything out and that I should do it and deliver it and that she had no time to work before the rehearsal week.  At that point I told Adryan to dismiss her immediately.  And we have the wonderful Shelly Markham to replace her so it's all good now.

Show her the door!


Show her the south end of a horse going north!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:25:47 PM

Which side of a cheetah has the most spots?





THE OUTSIDE!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jennifer on June 11, 2013, 07:25:26 PM
I am on FB with a West L.A. group and for the most part is is fun.  This afternoon I welcomed a new member who in response thanked me and asked how I'm doing.  He then sent me a friend request which I haven't responded to.

On FB I asked if he was being friendly or if I should know him.  I don't know him & he is much younger, and went to a different high school so why he wants to be my friend I haven't a clue.

The semi-creepy part is the message he sent me:
"HELLO JANE U CAN REMEMBER ME OK AND U CAN STAY IN CONTACT WITH ME IF U LIKE OK. IF U LIKE TO TXT LET ME KNOW I CAN GIVE U MY CELL OK. NICE TO MEET U JANE."


That is creepy. Definitely don't accept him.  Some people are creepy. While others just probably friend everyone they come into contact with. Either way you don't know him, and since he can't even spell ... well I would click ignore.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:26:43 PM

How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas?




He felt his presents!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:27:34 PM

What happened when the butcher backed into his meat grinder?












HE GOT A LITTLE BEHIND IN HIS WORK
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:28:00 PM
Addendum to my little Peckinpah outburst of a while ago --

How did I overlook Major Dundee?  With, again, the good graces of Mr. Nick Redman.

I was listening to the commentary on The Wild Bunch earlier, and I don't know if I've heard three or four more enthusiastic, knowledgeable, and passionate people talking about a film and a director.  It's remarkable.  Hey, maybe all of these are that good.  Wouldn't that be great?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:28:31 PM

What does a vegan zombie eat?











Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Jennifer on June 11, 2013, 07:28:21 PM
Jane sure goes to bed early.  She never did back when I first knew here and she was fifteen.  She could actually stay up till eight or nine back then.

I'm sure she is not actually going to bed. Probably just closing down her computer or reading. :)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:29:29 PM
A magician was driving down the road..











then he turned into a drive way.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:30:04 PM
I'm trying to figure out how to store it. It's too big for the commercial fruitcake tins I have sitting around. I've got the cheesecloth to wrap it in and plenty o' bourbon to keep it moist as it ages. The beauty of this recipe (at least to me) is that it uses dried fruit, none of the candied fruit at all.

Interesting with only dried fruit.  I'm curious how you will end up storing it.  How often do you need to add the brandy?  Of course you must let me know how it comes out. 

It's whiskey and I think I'll be adding it as often as I think it needs it to stay moist. Probably check on it every other week or so.

Sorry, right you said bourbon.  What did you decide to store it in besides cheesecloth?
I haven't yet. That cake could sit out by itself for a month and be OK. But with the whiskey added, the situation gets worse. I may have a cake carrier I could use to store it in.

Be sure to line it with something or you will have bourbon stains ;)

You say 'bourbon stains' like that was a bad thing.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:30:43 PM

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?





Make me one with everything!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:31:21 PM

Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?




BECAUSE IT'S POINTLESS!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:33:21 PM
There’s two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says



‘You man the guns, I’ll drive’
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:34:04 PM
I think everybody else has pressed that  "ignore" button
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:35:34 PM

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided?













Both crews were marooned.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 07:39:12 PM
Those are all actually very funny, Vixmom!  I'm enjoying them! :D
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 07:41:03 PM
Thank you George!  I can always count on you!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 07:40:20 PM
And on that note (C-natural), I'm leaving.  I want to go to Costco for some gas and just to look around.

Be back later!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:47:53 PM
I got involved in so many other things tonight that there's no way to properly watch AT LONG LAST LOVE now.

Tomorrow night is free.  Tomorrow night it shall be. 
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 07:47:35 PM
So, I'm watching some clips of the Tony Awards Show. Can someone explain this to me?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBv8zr2y48A

It says it has been removed by its owner
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 07:48:13 PM

What does a vegan zombie eat?











Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains!


I love this.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 07:50:40 PM
Just finished "Pushover," a nifty film noir with Fred MacMurray and, in her first role, Kim Novak. Really enjoyed the first five minutes, a bank robbery, in which no dialogue is used. The director, Richard Quine, seemed to be having fun.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: ChasSmith on June 11, 2013, 07:55:14 PM
Just finished "Pushover," a nifty film noir with Fred MacMurray and, in her first role, Kim Novak. Really enjoyed the first five minutes, a bank robbery, in which no dialogue is used. The director, Richard Quine, seemed to be having fun.

I have it, but haven't watched it.  I shall remedy that.  Thanks, DR John G.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Laura on June 11, 2013, 08:00:45 PM

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?





Make me one with everything!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GogjFO8GNEo
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Laura on June 11, 2013, 08:01:24 PM
Well, it was there when I watched it, TCB. It was the Rascals.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 08:20:03 PM
The parcel we got with delivery confirm that I'd been so worried about turned out to be  present of a box of mangos.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: FJL on June 11, 2013, 08:22:58 PM
We had a lovely dinner with our friends Bill and Maureen, and also Ed Dixon, who's a friend that Bill had worked with (they did that terrific HAPPY END in Baltimore Center Stage together).
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 08:29:05 PM
Off to block Angel Street Act Three, where there will be lots of kissing, and fighting, and tying people up.  Some of it is in the script.


 :)


Many people don't know that the play's subtitle is Hogtied, Hollerin', & Hickies.




Only in the video version in which you appeared.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: vixmom on June 11, 2013, 08:33:42 PM
Hogtied, Hollerin', & Hickies.

HEY!  This is the name of my autobiography!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: MBarnum on June 11, 2013, 08:41:13 PM
I am on FB with a West L.A. group and for the most part is is fun.  This afternoon I welcomed a new member who in response thanked me and asked how I'm doing.  He then sent me a friend request which I haven't responded to.

On FB I asked if he was being friendly or if I should know him.  I don't know him & he is much younger, and went to a different high school so why he wants to be my friend I haven't a clue.

The semi-creepy part is the message he sent me:
"HELLO JANE U CAN REMEMBER ME OK AND U CAN STAY IN CONTACT WITH ME IF U LIKE OK. IF U LIKE TO TXT LET ME KNOW I CAN GIVE U MY CELL OK. NICE TO MEET U JANE."


That is creepy. Definitely don't accept him.  Some people are creepy. While others just probably friend everyone they come into contact with. Either way you don't know him, and since he can't even spell ... well I would click ignore.


I agree with DR Jennifer's response, DR Jane. Except the "can't spell" part, cause then you would have never accepted my friend request.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 08:48:02 PM
Jane, did you watch the original "Lost Horizon" recently? The library copy came in while I was on vacation, so I haven't been able to watch it until now. Anyway, just wondering what you thought of the dialogue between Thomas Mitchell and Edward Everett Horton. It seems like Mitchell is trying to pick up Horton, or Lovey, as he calls him, every time they talk.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 08:47:35 PM
Page Six Bob Benson & Pete Campbell Dance.

(http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1183173/thumbs/s-MAD-MEN-BOB-PETE-large.jpg?6)




Who?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 08:52:44 PM
Workers are winding down - they may or may not finish today, but definitely tomorrow - the last of the painting is happening now - all of the lattice work on the patio - boy does that help.  Originally they weren't going to do it, so I offered to pay half (it wasn't much) and that did the trick.  they've been very good to me here, and have never raised the rent in eight years.

You have been lucky.  I hope that doesn't change after all the work they are doing.

I don't think it will - they really like having me here.

Probably nice.  Good home renters are worth keeping & appreciated more, IMHO, than apartment renters.


I beg your pardon!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 08:54:32 PM
During lunch, I made a Whiskey Nut Cake. It had to bake for three hours.

At what temperature?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 09:01:24 PM
During lunch, I made a Whiskey Nut Cake. It had to bake for three hours.

At what temperature?
250 degrees.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 09:02:17 PM
Finished with my viewing, got the new musical director all his stuff, and then did the layouts for two put-togethers, one of which is a duet - so I figured out who sings what and actually did a really fun arrangement on paper that should work out really well.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 09:02:30 PM
Thinking about the second jog.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 09:02:39 PM
Which I don't think I'll do.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 09:03:01 PM
I only had the quesadilla, some popcorn, and a couple of low-cal candies.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 09:04:59 PM
I know that a few of the posters here will, once in a while, stop by Facebook; but did everyone here happen to see that former DR Jason is leaving New York and moving to San Diego?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 09:08:41 PM
Vet called with Callie's results.  She still has high calcium levels, but she always has had.  Interestingly enough, I just read online of people thinking there's a connection between lactulose and high calcium.  She also has high cholesterol. That may be because she just ate before we went to the vet.   Anyway, if I want more tests to figure out the calcium, I can do it.  Since she's been that way for at least 8 1/2 years, I don't think it's worth messing with

Good news.  I think that is a wise decision.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 09:10:45 PM
I'll have you all know I just unjammed the ice-maker in my fridge.


Whew!  I will sleep better knowing that.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 09:13:44 PM
I hear thunder...


That was just my stomach growling.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 09:19:00 PM
Post deleted.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: John G. on June 11, 2013, 09:27:52 PM
Good night, all.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Cillaliz on June 11, 2013, 09:31:36 PM
  Since she's been that way for at least 8 1/2 years, I don't think it's worth messing with

LOL-Understandable.

How long has she been on lactulose?

8 1/2 years
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 09:41:39 PM
What, me worry?
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Cillaliz on June 11, 2013, 09:42:28 PM
Well, tonight I had dinner with Paul at Panera.  Great shrimp and avocado salad sandwich - something new on their menu, then came home and mowed the yard.  Then I practiced my flute for tomorrow night's flute choir performance at ice cream days (is it bad that I would like this one to get rained out) We play again on Saturday for an hour.  That one I hope does not get rained out.  I also have to play for a mini concert band performance on Friday.  I guess this is flute week
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: Cillaliz on June 11, 2013, 09:44:06 PM
I'm pretty sleepy.  We may have thunderstorms overnight and I'm hoping the walls won't be noisy tonight.  Better medicate the cat and go to bed.  Night all
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 10:01:49 PM
A magician was driving down the road..











then he turned into a drive way.


I once had a car that turned into a parking lot.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 10:20:22 PM
Well, it was there when I watched it, TCB. It was the Rascals.


I'm sorry, I just tried again.  Maybe it is my computer.  Of course, if it was The Rascals, I already saw it one too many times.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: TCB on June 11, 2013, 10:26:23 PM
I just watched a concert by Il Volo.  I guess I had heard of them, I believe they toured with Kevin's girlfriend.  I guess they were good, but if I am going to watch PBS, I would rather watch Celtic Thunder.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 10:59:31 PM
I went to Costco and bought the Blu-ray/DVD/Digital Copy edition of "Oz The Great and Powerful."  They offered an $8 rebate, so it cost less than Amazon!  Anyway, I went to redeem the digital code and it didn't work!  I thought I followed the instructions correctly but when it (automatically) started iTunes, it just didn't start to download. :'( There's an e-mail address to send if there are problems, so hopefully, someone alive will actually be able to help.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 11:01:16 PM
But on a happier note (G#)...
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 11:02:07 PM
PAGE 13 DANCE!!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 11:23:19 PM
And now, I must restart my computer to finish the updates.  I hate it when that happens when I'm up- or downloading stuff overnight and it breaks the connection. :P
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 11:36:32 PM
Done!
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: George on June 11, 2013, 11:36:41 PM
Just had to share. :)
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 11:41:04 PM
It is always important to complete one's updates, otherwise one is simply not up to date or complete.
Title: Re: HOARY JOKES
Post by: bk on June 11, 2013, 11:41:18 PM
Notes are written.  Written are notes.