Haines His Way

Valentine's Day Story:

Der Brucer was in the hospital with meningitis.  The medics had taken their sweet time figuring out that it was meningitis, which was punching holes in his brain, and were predicting that he would probably have to be institutionalized if he ever got out of the hospital.  Since we weren't (and still aren't) married, they weren't bothering to tell me this, of course, which is just as well because I was danged near suicidal about his being in the hospital as it was.

Isn't this turning out to be a lovely story?

He'd been in the hospital for over a month when I went in for my daily visit.  He seemed to be more alert this day, and asked me to find him some chocolate.  I obliged, went to a chocolatier and bought him a box, along with a small white teddy bear holding a red heart.  It was, after all, Valentine's Day.

When I got back, der Brucer looked at me and asked, "How did I get here?"  I told him that the hospital staff had moved him from the main building to the annex just a couple of days ago, and that we had wheeled him down the hall...

"No.  How did I get here in the hospital?"

Miraculously, his mental functions had returned, not just partially but entirely.  He was back again.  The doctors, who had been so kind before with their accuracy of diagnosis and treating me as some alien being, were totally baffled once again.  

The only problem for der Brucer is that he has no memory at all of being ill.  The only problem for me is that I remember that time all too well.  And that is why I cringe every year at Valentine's Day, not because he recovered, but because he might not have recovered at all.

The end.

This made me cry! It did turn out to be a lovely story in the end... and what better gift for you to receive but getting your own der Brucer back!

I'm up, I'm up.

If only my ex-wife had given me a circular saw, I might still be married today.  

Singing "Will It Go 'Round in Circles", no doubt!

The sadder, but wiser man has prevailed.

I have always enjoyed rock, all throughout the fifties, certainly in the sixties, and even through most of the seventies.  What parades itself as music today is crap and ninety-nine percent of it will be forgotten within three years.  

I had nothing to do with A Broadway Valentine - it was merely an album culled from tracks I produced.  It was done after my involvement with the uh... company.

And since I have been E&T so much lately, I think it's time for a little FF Trivia as well:

Dorothy Killgallen was evidently completely incapable of getting anything about Frances right, ever (well, once--she wrote a terrific column lambasting papers for printing that famous photo of FF kicking the policeman).  Among the many things Killgallen published over the years:  1) Frances was working as an oil rigger!  (I think maybe she fell asleep during Flowing Gold and thought it had really happened, LOL).  2)  Frances was still institutionalized in the mid-50s and had taken a turn for the worse; 3) my personal favorite--she was running a "radio show" called Frances Entertains and would "surprise" her interviewees by announcing she was Frances Farmer at the end of her interviews.  

Welcome back DR  JMK. You have been missed!

And happy Oregon Day to all you valentines!

MELON!

...But the problem is if  you really do something great too soon in a relationship, you feel you have to top it the next year until the bar is set too high and the law of diminishing returns sets in....

That law of diminishing returns is called marriage.  Live with it.  

To combat this, I have not done too much last year or this, kind of resetting the expectation-o-meter.  Romantic, huh?

 I take it she does not read the postings on this site?  

Hello all.

Well, Valentine's Day was yesterday for us Down Under.

I was sitting at work when I received an emergency phone call from my landlord.

It seems my driveway had collapsed.  

It must have been all those trucks delivering my cards, flowers & chocolates ......  !!!

Hello all.

Well, Valentine's Day was yesterday for us Down Under.

I was sitting at work when I received an emergency phone call from my landlord.

It seems my driveway had collapsed.  

It must have been all those trucks delivering my cards, flowers & chocolates ......  !!!

 See what happens when you're too popular?

BTW, what did your landlord expect YOU to do about it?

Welcome back DR  JMK. You have been missed!

Thank you, Vixmom.  I imagine you'll be receiving an AOL IM any moment now, LOL.

Re:  dishwashers.  I think I posted this here last year--we got a new one, too, and true to everything else in this fershlugganah house, we discovered, that whoever had installed the old one had never grounded the outlet (bad thing when dealing with wet dishes, etc.), and had put in a two by four to hold the thing up that had to be cut out for them to get the new one in.  Also, they hadn't used copper tubing for the water supply--it was an old rubber hose they had taped (!!) onto the feed line.  The installer for the new one said we had been courting disaster for the 10 years we had been using the old one.  The only reason we ended up getting a new one is because the spring on the door broke on the old one, and the door was really heavy.  We were afraid one of the kids would bean themselves with it.  

What lovely postings, cards, and stories.....

Paris.....and the hospital.  A merry-go-round of emotions.

DR HISAKA what a lovely Valentine card.

DR OZDEREK - a collapsing drive way!  A circular saw and chocolate Chinese food.  Well where else on the internet....indeed!

Looking forward to the Classic Images issue, MBARNUM....and I may have something exciting to send to you in a few days.  I will let you know.

LOL DRJMK....I had never read those Kilgallen tidbits....LOL.  And there is no such thing as bad publicity.  I think the idea of FRANCES ENTERTAINS is the one that amuses me most......."Thanks for coming in to the station, and by the way....I'm Frances Farmer!" LOL...

Happy Valentine's Day....see....Mother of Mercy....is this the card of Rico?