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[Jane]

We artistes tend to be emotional beings and always have the instinct to respond immediately and not pleasantly.  But what does one gain from that, exactly?  Momentary satisfaction, I suppose, but that's about it.  Saying nothing is the high road - they can do what they please and when people like this create this aura of negativity, one doesn't have to do anything at all - one just sits back and karma does the rest.  And when I've behaved poorly in my past life, believe me I paid thanks to karma - which is why I constantly strive to be a decent human being - who needs bad karma?  Not me.  That I leave to them.

You don't know for sure that they didn't do this months ago before you sort of reconciled with them.  What they did was really not nice.  But it sort of reminds me of what someone does when they break up with someone else. They get rid of all their stuff.  Should they have done this? No. Was it nice? No.  Does it hurt your feelings. Of course.

Good point about the timing of when they did this.

[bk]

We artistes tend to be emotional beings and always have the instinct to respond immediately and not pleasantly.  But what does one gain from that, exactly?  Momentary satisfaction, I suppose, but that's about it.  Saying nothing is the high road - they can do what they please and when people like this create this aura of negativity, one doesn't have to do anything at all - one just sits back and karma does the rest.  And when I've behaved poorly in my past life, believe me I paid thanks to karma - which is why I constantly strive to be a decent human being - who needs bad karma?  Not me.  That I leave to them.

I think responding when you are emotional is not a good thing. So I'm glad that you decided to wait.

I have a question though. Why are you so mad at them? You don't know for sure that they didn't do this months ago before you sort of reconciled with them.  What they did was really not nice.  But it sort of reminds me of what someone does when they break up with someone else. They get rid of all their stuff.  Should they have done this? No. Was it nice? No.  Does it hurt your feelings. Of course.

I think you mentioned once that they were dealing with other issues. Just take the high road here.  No need to wish them bad karma.

There has never been a sort of reconciliation.  They have treated me with disregard since last July for reasons only known to them.  They've apologized once, said they were going to make it right right after the first of the year - they haven't.  I don't have anger - I had nausea seeing the books.  And I don't need to wish them bad karma and don't - I just know enough about karma to know that it will do its work and I'm sorry to say that people who do things like this deserve what they get.

[bk]

Oh, and they didn't do it months ago because I was in the store five weeks ago.

[Jane]

Oh, and they didn't do it months ago because I was in the store five weeks ago.

I had thought you left things on a better note during your last communications, not that they could really be trusted.  I doubt you will ever understand their actions.

[FJL]

We artistes tend to be emotional beings and always have the instinct to respond immediately and not pleasantly.  But what does one gain from that, exactly?  Momentary satisfaction, I suppose, but that's about it.  Saying nothing is the high road - they can do what they please and when people like this create this aura of negativity, one doesn't have to do anything at all - one just sits back and karma does the rest.  And when I've behaved poorly in my past life, believe me I paid thanks to karma - which is why I constantly strive to be a decent human being - who needs bad karma?  Not me.  That I leave to them.

You don't know for sure that they didn't do this months ago before you sort of reconciled with them.  What they did was really not nice.  But it sort of reminds me of what someone does when they break up with someone else. They get rid of all their stuff.  Should they have done this? No. Was it nice? No.  Does it hurt your feelings. Of course.

Good point about the timing of when they did this.

That is interesting, Jennifer,  You can;t really tell from the time they end up on the shelf because it takes time for the staff to sort the books that coem in.

[FJL]

BK - You can always ask.  If the true answer is "oh, we did that with the books before we stopped being mad" most normal "innocent" people would happily joyfully say so and be thrilled at the chance to say so and make things go right rather than keep the conflict going.

[FJL]

Jane - hope you;re ffeeling OK!!!!

[FJL]

Vibes to Cilla

[Jane]

Thanks DR FJL.  I hope so. 

[Jane]

'night

[Ginny]

Time to make the donuts reset the clocks - 'night!

[Cillaliz]

Thanks FJL

[Cillaliz]

It's been raining all day today

[Cillaliz]

Tonight it's supposed to turn to snow

[Cillaliz]

Didn't get my work done for the office today, but I think I needed the 3 1/2 hour nap.  I still have tomorrow and tomorrow night to do it.  It will get done, it always does.

[Cillaliz]

Sorry you've had to go through all this BK.

[TCB]

From DR TCB:

Today was a beautiful day here in Western Washington.  Bright blue skies and temperatures in the 50's.  And I had a nice leisurely lunch with two old friends.  One was the first girl I ever went on a date with, and one was the girl I was engaged to while in college.

I'm glad you had a nice afternoon out.  How is it the two women are also friends?

The three of us went to grade school, junior high school, and high school together.  My ex- fiancé, who lives in Vegas, has been upvisiting for the last ten days.  Last Saturday night, our reunion group had a get-together for her, but it was held in a very noisy bar, so there was not much chance for conversation.  Thus, lunch for three.
 

[vixmom]

today I slept until nearly 10 AM - quite unusual for me -

[vixmom]

then I got up  dressed and drove the Vixter to collect her car from the shop, only the shop, despite  posted signage stating they were open, was not, in fact, open, but rather locked up tighter than a drum with  the Vixters car  safely locked in the garage

[vixmom]

so we came home

[vixmom]

The Vixter had lunch plans so Vixdad and I went to the IHOP for a late breakfast

[vixmom]

Then I went to the Honda dealership to discuss warranty plans

[vixmom]

then I ran many errands

[vixmom]

then I came home and cooked dinner

[vixmom]

steak terriyaki, wild rice with cranberries and corn in a butter sauce

[vixmom]

and then as I was flipping through the channels I found them introducing Grand Hotel on TCM - I had never actually seen this movie (nor the musical- except for the Tonys' clip)  so I decided to watch it

[vixmom]

Apparently it is Hotels night because it was followed by Weekend at the Waldorf - which didn't "grab" me  so I shut it off and came here

[vixmom]

and that's where I was, if anybody cares

[ChasSmith]

Boy, I missed some stuff once everyone got to posting today.

I love finding autographed books, but I always wonder what the circumstances were that put the book in the store.  Often, I suppose, it's from someone having died and their belongings being sold.  Some of the people selling the books may not even know or care that there was a signature or inscription.  I've found a few that were damned nice, and I will never part with them.

And I have indeed wondered what it must feel like for authors to find their own books that way.  Oh, here's a little cautionary tale...

A couple of months ago I purchased a book about the making of Lawrence of Arabia from a seller on Amazon Marketplace.  It's the one by Morris and Raskin, and both -- or at least Raskin -- post frequently along with Robert Harris and others in the Lawrence threads on Home Theater Forum.  It's not a rare book, but it's been out of print long enough to make really good copies a nice find, and these guys encourage people to seek them out from the secondhand dealers, because they want the book appreciated, not languishing on some store's shelf.

Anyhoo, I was thrilled with the condition of the book -- a copy that had just flown under the radar and which I got for a song -- but even happier when I found an inscription from not one, but both of the authors.  I mentioned this in the thread, and Lawrie Raskin was interested to hear who it had been signed to back in the early 1990s.  As I was responding, I had a sudden fear that it would be someone he knew, the worst case being a friend, and I wished I'd kept my mouth shut.  Fortunately, he didn't know the name; further, he recognized the inscription as being one that they signed a couple of hundred copies for, and all was well.  In fact, the story of those copies was quite interesting, but he didn't want to post it publicly, just told me about it in an email.

I've probably forgotten a nuance or two, but the main point is that I was so relieved to learn that I hadn't been party to bringing an author any grief!

So, back to BK's experience -- how amazing, what was there and what wasn't (i.e., the Hofstetters).  Gotta wonder about that.  But however passive-aggressive or plain old aggressive or malicious or desperate the act was, it's that family's own burden to deal with.

[vixmom]

Ginny, I am sorry your friends disappointed you but it may be that there was a miscommunication.

When I was on AOL I was forever getting emails for someone who possess the same name - but lives in North Carolina - I was constantly receiving invitations to play tennis, go to Boy Scout , Church and  PTA  events, all misdirected communications to my name twin -  I would repeatedly tell these people they had the wrong woman and to please call their woman and get the correct emails address but none the less for years I would get these  emails which of course meant that the poor lady in North Carolina was NOT