Well, dear readers, first and foremost let me wish all of our haineshisway.com fathers a very happy Father’s Day. I, myself, am a father and hence today is my day. Today I shall luxuriate in my very own day. I shall put on my pointy party hat and my colored tights and pantaloons and I shall dance the Hora and the Shimmy. I shall eat a special Father’s Day meal and top it off with Mother’s Cookies. Of course, I also celebrate Mother’s Day by eating Father’s Cookies, because I have, in my time, been called a big mother. In any case, I hope all fathers have a beautiful beautiful day.
Now, I must tell you that we had very low traffic here at haineshisway.com yesterday. We were at dangerously low traffic levels yesterday – you could walk the streets of haineshisway.com yesterday with nary a Hainsie/Kimlet in sight or, for that matter, site. After all, we have been on quite an upward swing, and suddenly yesterday we were on a downward swing, and we Hainsies/Kimlets cannot allow that to happen. At this rate, June will not have been as popular as May. May, as you know, was much more popular that April and April was much more popular than March. So, let’s do our part, let’s pull our weight (no mean feat), let’s win one for the gipper, let’s keep moving onward and upward, let’s hit the heights, let’s shake our collective booty, let’s travel the disco highway, let’s keep our collective eye on the sparrow, let’s stay up on our toes, let’s stay up where we belong, let’s face the music and dance, let’s begin the beguine, let’s boogie, let’s have everything the traffic will allow so that everything’s coming up roses. After all, if you start taking a day off, then I shall have to start taking a day off and then the next thing you know we’ll all be taking a day off, and the Internet would be a less happy place, would it not? So, get off your collective keysters, and let’s have fun, fun, fun (that is three funs) every single day. Let’s make June, June, June the best month of all. Furthermore, if you wish to know which major Hollywood Star I’ll be meeting with on Tuesday, you must do your part. Besides, also on Tuesday I will let you in on a big surprise which will surprise you which, after all, is the point of a surprise.
In the meantime, let us all click on the Unseemly Button below and see what the next section has to offer.
Well, I have looked high and low and also low and high and there don’t seem to be any offers in this section. I was at least hoping for a set of low-priced Ginsu Knives or the George Foreman Grill. What the hell am I talking about? Isn’t this Father’s Day? Shouldn’t I be doing Fatherly things? Shouldn’t someone be taking me out for a Fatherly Brunch? Just what in tarnation is going on here, father-wise?
Yesterday, I lay out by a pool with various and sundried (literally sundried) people. I must say I looked rather tan and buff and toned with my abs and buns of steel and the blonde bits in my hair. I didn’t actually go in the pool because I didn’t have a bathing outfit with me. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, I did not have a bathing outfit with me – in fact, I do not own a bathing outfit and haven’t for many years. I normally swim in my cut-off jeans, but I’d neglected to wear my cut-off jeans, I was wearing my brand spanking new and loose Nike shorts (with a Nudie Musical t-shirt purchased from right here at haineshisway.com), but I do not swim in my brand spanking new and loose Nike shorts. Other people did get in the pool, however, and that was very exciting to watch. Some people had very nice bathing outfits and some people should not have been wearing the bathing outfits they were wearing. Some people did not look attractive in their chosen bathing attire. Why am I telling you this story, since it has no point?
Well, why don’t we just get directly to the topic of discussion which, as you know, is a free-for-all. Yes, Virginia, today is free-for-all day, the day in which any topic goes, the day in which you can talk about anything you choose as long as it is not too too unseemly. So, put on your thinking caps and post away, and lots have yards and yards of posts to make up for the paltry posts of the past two days or, as we like to call them, the paltry posts of yore. Or should that be the paltry posts of your? Post away, my pretties.