Well, dear readers, the rain seems to have abated, oh, yes, the rain seems to have abated. The singing bird is outside singing Rainy Days and Thursdays (a clever change in lyric by the bird) – the bird is singing up a storm, frankly, but let’s hope the real storm is over for the time being. The sun isn’t exactly out but perhaps the sun’ll come out tomorrow – oh, a Strouse and Charnin reference.
I’ve been on the phone for the last half-hour with an early-morning call with one of our Nudie Musical director candidates, and we’ve discussed the script and I’ve heard his/her ideas. Later I’ll talk to the other candidate and discuss same, and then I just have to make the decision and be done with it. They’re both really talented, so it’s not easy.
Last night I watched Mr. Nicholas Roeg’s film of The Man Who Fell to Earth, a strange movie which has lost none of its strangeness in the ensuing years since its first release. My goodness, that was a long sentence. I didn’t love it back then (although it had been cut for its American release) and I don’t love it now. But it’s very interestingly done and David Bowie, no actor he, is surprisingly effective as the man who fell. Candy Clark is bold and wonderful, and so are Rip Torn and Buck Henry. Interestingly, everyone but Bowie ages during the film, and when you see Rip Torn at the end he looks almost exactly as he does now – so his makeup was top-notch, let me tell you. There are lots of extras (a whole second disc’s worth) and the film is worth a look if you haven’t seen it. It’s rather surprisingly randy, extremely randy so if you are easily shocked this might not be for you. Almost all of the explicit randiness was cut for its original release, so it’s nice to have this restored version.
I then watched an hour of a new DVD of Benny Hill moments. I never saw his show much when it was on, but I must say I laughed out loud many times as I watched, and a couple of the bits are way ahead of their time and hilarious (he does a thing on pan & scan of widescreen movies that should be a primer for why letterboxing is necessary). I am fond of low humor every now and then, and Mr. Hill is excellent at it.
Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because don’t I have excellent questions to answer? I do, I do – oh, a Schmidt and Jones reference.
Jrand52 asks if reissue soundtrack CDs of films like The Five Pennies are subject to artist royalties, and if those albums are played on the radio would the performers be due ASCAP royalties. In the case of a licensed soundtrack or show, the licensing company gives an all-in price which includes the royalties due, so we would have no way of knowing who the royalty participants were/are. However, unless the performer was a huge star, they probably wouldn’t be due anything – just depends on the deal they made at the time. As to radio, no the performers get nothing – they are not covered by ASCAP but rather AFTRA. The writers, of course, get writer’s royalties always. If movies go entirely digital will changeover marks be gone forever? I’m afraid so.
William E. Lurie asks given the fact that there are still so many unreleased cast albums on CD, why is DRG (and certain other labels) reissuing cast album CDs that have already been out, didn’t sell and were taken off the market. Well, I don’t profess to understand the motives behind these decisions. They must think that after eight years there might be a new audience somewhere, but I’m afraid they will find out what we all find out. There are finite sales for reissues and they are pretty paltry in the scheme of things. So, why they’d reissue an album that had already been released by a major, I have no idea, especially when the album was readily available for years. There are certain cases where an album wasn’t readily available, i.e. House of Flowers, Li’l Abner, so those make sense. The others do not.
Jose asks if I’ve ever been pleasantly surprised by a certain food/dish or combination of foods, things that I didn’t think would work but that end up being delicious? Hmmm. Oh, I suppose there are certain dishes with fruit in them, and I’m always surprised that those taste good. Do I like my barbecue ribs dry or wet? I like sauce if that means wet. But I also like really spicy ones without sauce, too. Was there a song I really wanted to put on an album but wasn’t able to due to rights or not finding the right singer. You know, I can’t think of a single instance where that happened.
Matthew asks what it was like working with Florence Lacey and her husband (Tim Stella) on the cast album of Hello, Dolly! I liked Flo very much. Tim can sometimes be a pill (I worked with him on I Do! I Do! as well), but they’re both very nice people. We even had dinner and discussed doing an album, but I’m afraid all they wanted was for us to put up the money and then they’d go off and do whatever they wanted, and that was not the way we did things.
Philip asks what “unlikely” singers could tackle the Great American Songbook? Oh, I suppose Sting would be a natural. I don’t really think most singers today have distinctive enough voices but more importantly I find them lacking in interpretive styles.
Ben asks if we here in Los Angeles, California have to do what New Yorkers now have to do – press eleven digits to make a call from one’s particular area code. Not yet, thank heaven.
Tom from Oz asks what is my favorite season and what are my favorite songs for each season. Oh, I suppose Autumn, with Autumn in New York being a favorite, along with Malty and Shire’s Autumn. Spring Can Really Hang You Up The Most, Winter is Warm – can’t think of any more. I guess that means I need more seasoning.
Dave asks what is my favorite year? Oh, as you will find out in Kritzerland, I am very partial to the year 1959. Dave notes that psclassics is issuing a Maury Yeston compilation that sounds rather like the ones I’m noted for. If I were to produce a similar songbook whose work would I profile and which artists would I use? Well, I cannot say, because the next thing you know someone else will do it, and then where will I be? I have several ideas in mind for interesting albums, should things proceed as they might.
Jay asks when we’re going to have our next round of wrong casting for musicals. Why today, Jay, how’s that for service?
Lulu asks who is my all-time favorite actor and actress and why? Oh, that’s too hard. But here are some choices: James Stewart (he can do anything, really), Cary Grant (no one like him), Joel McCrea (vastly underrated and quite brilliant in my opinion), Claude Rains (unique, one-off), Henry Fonda (unique, one-off) – actresses – Barbara Stanwyck (love her), Veronica Lake (vastly underrated, love her), Eva Marie Saint (love her), Brunella Bova (I only know one performance, but it’s a great one – The White Sheik), Deborah Kerr (always wonderful), and, of course, Leslie Parrish. And, of course, hundreds of others.
William F. Orr asks where is love and does it fall from skies above? It must fall from somewhere and I wish it would fall on me.
JMK asks if I’ve heard the new recording of Sadie Thompson? No, I haven’t.
Laura asks if I still get residuals from MASH. No, anything pre 1975 doesn’t pay resids after seven runs, and all the shows I did back then long since passed that plateau. After 1975, you get residuals no matter how many runs, but the checks I get now are usually for four dollars.
KT asks if I’ve seen My Big Fat Greek Wedding or Kissing Jessica Stein. No to both, but Greek Wedding just came out on DVD so I’m sure I’ll catch it soon.
Hapgood asks what I think of productions of plays and musicals that were not what their creators intended, such as modern dress Shakespeare or Sam Mendes’ Cabaret. I think plays and musicals can stand different approaches from their original productions. However, when they muck about with the book and score too much, then I think it’s not such a good thing. Shakespeare does seem to work in a variety and also Hollywood Reporter of settings and eras. Is there a CD that I’ve gotten in the past three months that the dear readers must have – yes, the soundtrack to Far From Heaven – it’s had the most repeats of any CD I’ve bought in ages. What is the most recent piece of theater I’ve seen and what did I think? Well, this ASCAP/Disney thing the other night, which I just wrote about, and before that I think Say Goodnight, Gracie, which I enjoyed very much. Will I watch or tape the Oscars. Yes, I will watch – I never miss them. What is my opinion of Miss Bernadette Peters? I have liked her very much on occasion, and there are times when I haven’t liked her at all, such as the revival of Annie Get Your Gun. Is there any current piece of theater I’m dying to see? Yes, I’d like to see Hairspray, and there’s a production of Long Day’s Journey Into Night coming in that I’d like to see. Do I speak any other languages? I have enough trouble speaking English. Do I have any advice to someone who is singing All of Me with his high school jazz band? Swing, baby, swing. Do I visit sondheim.com? I used to quite regularly (I had a column there for over two years), but I haven’t been in quite some time because this here site is more than enough for me to handle. When was the last time it snowed in Southern California? Quite some time ago, I really can’t remember when. It’s only actually snowed a couple of times that I recall. What is my opinion of Urinetown, the Musical? I haven’t seen it. I didn’t care for the CD at all, but I’m sure that might change if I actually saw the show.
George asks how Nia Vardalos can be nominated for Best Original Screenplay when her script began life as a one-woman show. My memory is that she wrote it as a screenplay first, then when there were no takers, she did it as a one-hander. George wants to know who gets the demos we made for Nudie Musical. The producers, the potential directors. Is it possible for Donald to play any cuts from the demo or do I specifically not want the general public to hear a work in progress because there will always be naysayers. Well, since we know there are naysayers who visit here and search regularly, that is certainly a possibility. I’m very proud of the songs and have no fears whatsoever about people hearing them – but the demo was done down and dirty and I don’t know if I like it enough to want to have it “air”.
Michael what other acting, directing, composing, writing and producing credits are missing from the imdb for my very own self. Well, about eighty-percent of my career I think. I don’t think they list either composing or acting credits for Danny DeVito’s The Ratings Game, I don’t think they list many of my guest shots, including The Young Lawyers, Doctor’s Hospital, Beggarman, Thief, and tons of others, nor any of my pilots, including Young Love (spinoff of The Doris Day Show), Tabitha and a few others, I don’t think they list Dinah and Her New Best Friends, or Donny and Marie, or Playboy on the Air and on and on and on. Michael lists Comedy of Errors, Stages, The Good One and Together Again as my stage shows. He wants to know if anything is missing. Yes. My first original musical, Start at the Top, my Ring Lardner revue, Shut Up, He Explained, my musical Feast! (Diana Canova and Alan Abelew’s Nudie Musical characters were lifted directly from that show), a musical of The Manaechmus Twins – I think that’s about it. Oh, and my never-produced musical of To Kill a Mockingbird. Other than Lisa Richard’s CD and material I’ve recorded, have my songs been recorded by any other singers? I know for a time several of my songs were performed in cabarets for a time, but I have no idea if any of those people ever recorded them or not, although I’ll assume not since I’ve never received any publishing money. Who were the uncredited singers in Nudie Musical? Oh, with the exception of Debbie Gravitte and Diana Canova’s dubbing of Mary LaRue, and me, of course, I can’t really remember who else was there singing.
Craig asks what is one of my least favorite taste sensations? Well, anything with ginger – hate ginger. And mole sauce. I almost threw up when I took a bite of chicken with mole sauce. Are there any non-musical movies that scream out to be musicalized? Yes, Nightmare on Elm Street and The Towering Inferno. Are there any musical films or stage shows that would have been better served as plays or non-musical films. I’m sure there are but I can’t think of any off hand or even on hand. How many remote controls do I have? Well, TV, DVD, VCR, DAT, CD and receiver. What’s the last thing I bought off eBay. A Sergio Leone PAL DVD box set. Which instruments do I have in my house? A piano. What instruments did I study when I was growing up? Guitar, for a very short time, and then piano. Are there any I gave up I wish I hadn’t? No. When and how did I first meet Guy Haines? Oh, we’ve been friends for a long time, but we became very close back in 1993. Who is my favorite magician of all time and what is the best magic trick I’ve ever seen? You know, I can’t answer the question – I’ve seen magicians and tricks (not necessarily in that order) but I’ve never seen any of these superstar fellows like Doug Henning or Penn and Teller, so I’m really deficient magician-wise.
Arnold M. Brockman asks which shows I would record now that I’ve seen your want lists of unrecorded musicals. Well, I’ve always said that I would love to do complete studio versions of Smile, Lolita, My Love and The Yearling.
Dennis asks if I’ve seen the new DVD of Victim and if so what did I think of it. I have seen it and I wrote about it in these here notes not too long ago. I really liked it a lot, it’s a wonderful film. Just do a little search on “Victim” and/or “Dirk Bogarde” and you’ll find it. It was about a month ago, I think. Have I ever been to the Oscars and/or Tonys? No, I have been invited to the Tonys, but I’ve said I will never go to those kinds of things unless I am a nominee or unless a nominee wants me to accompany them. How does one become a sitter at the Oscars? I do not know how one becomes a sitter at the Oscars. Perhaps they have sitter auditions.
Kerry asks why I haven’t done a “What If” in quite some time and will I do one again? Absolutely I will, they just take a lot of time as I’m a stickler for being true to the rhyming scheme of what I’m parodying. But I will unearth the What If song that I wrote with Mr. Claibe Richardson, and I’ll print those lyrics here – the song was designed to explain the conceit of What If, and was going to be used if we were to do an evening of them (still possible).
Sandy asks what is my favorite kind of soup. I don’t love soup, but I do love clam chowder (white), and cream of mushroom soup (if done really well), and the Lobster Bisque at Hamburger Hamlet.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must go hither and thither while the rain has abated, and I must take part in a very important conference call, about which more later. Today’s topic of discussion: Your most wrong casting suggestions for the musical Hair. Go to it, you people.