Well, dear readers, I’m sorry to have to tell you that we’ve had a little setback with our little film, but hopefully said setback will be rectified quite soon. Unfortunately, these things happen in the world of both studio and independent filmmaking with more regularity than you can imagine, and especially right now with the world in turmoil. I had about four slight setbacks before Nudie Musical finally went before the cameras. I will keep you posted and let you know when we’re back on track which, as I’ve said, I trust will be very soon indeed.
In the meantime, there are many other things occupying my time right now, so that is good. One of the things that is occupying my time right now is producing a new CD. Yes, you heard it here, dear readers, I, BK, am producing a new CD. I’m producing it for our very own Richard Valley, who happens to run the best genre magazine around – Scarlet Street. We’ve actually been talking about this album since way back in the Varese Sarabande days and now by gum and by golly we are going to do it. What the album is I cannot say, oh, no, I cannot say at this time. At another time I will say what this album is, oh, yes, at another time I will tell all. I can tell you that it will feature many of my regular singers and that it will be a good deal of fun. My friend Grant Geissman is doing the musical directing and arrangements (he’s done arrangements for several of my albums) and we are hoping to be in the studio within the next eight weeks, both here and in New York. Isn’t that exciting? Isn’t that just too too?
Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below because don’t I have some excellent questions to answer? I do, I do – oh, a Schmidt and Jones reference.
Well, let’s dig in and get right to the answers to your excellent questions. Let us not tarry nor dally or even dally nor tarry. Let us not waste one more minute, one more second, one more nano-second.
JMK asks if it would be festive if we offered to hold the Oscars online here at HHW? I think that is a fine idea, because right now I have no way to watch the Academy Awards. About two months ago, I got so tired of my cable company and their bad reception and uninteresting channels that I had them shut it off. I kept meaning to get digital something-or-other, like Direct TV or whatever that is, but I haven’t done it yet. So, we must have an Oscar party right here so I can be with it and happening.
William E. Lurie asks what professional critics in any media, either current or past do I most respect and which do I think don’t know what they are talking about. Also, how much influence do I think they have on the success or failure of a movie, play or TV show? Oh, I really don’t give much credence to any critics, but there have been some who were interesting to read, who wrote well, and who at least had style and a brain. I liked reading the collected film criticism of James Agee, I liked when my friend Dick Lochte was reviewing theater for Los Angeles Magazine (he was the best theater critic this city has ever had), I liked Vincent Canby the movie reviewer and hated Vincent Canby the theater reviewer. Ebert and Siskel were like a vaudeville team, even though Siskel spoke with passion – I just rarely agreed with either of them. Robert Hilburn, the music critic for the LA Times was always interesting to read, even if he was a pedant and even if the music he was reviewing didn’t interest me much. I used to enjoy reading Walter Kerr, and even John Simon occasionally tickles me. And, of course, I love all the critics who have given me lovely reviews over the years, and hate all the critics who haven’t.
Jrand52 points out that today’s sitcom usually has what is known as an A story and a B story. Most of the classic sitcoms of old had one story from start to finish. Jrand would like to know when this practice started and if I think it’s because television performers today can’t sustain a full 22 minute show. Well, I really haven’t watched many of these new shows. I remember shows like Barney Miller had multiple stories going on, but I prefer one story for the half-hour. I think Seinfeld and Friends and those kinds of shows all ushered in this new trend and I think that since television is one big Xerox machine, they’ll all do it until someone comes along with the radical idea to go back to a one-story show. It’s not hard to sustain a 22 minute show, and of course in the old days they had to sustain 26 minutes. I think audiences have no patience, are restless, and must be assaulted in one way or another, hence short scenes rather than long scenes.
Arnold M. Brockman asks if it annoys me that MGM/UA does not have an insert or booklet in a large percentage of their DVDs. Well, given that that large percentage is usually their budget line, where you can usually get them for 14.99 or less (usually closer to ten bucks if you search) I don’t really mind. What I do mind is shoddy transfers or no effort to at least upgrade the master they’re using, i.e. Exodus. There is no excuse anymore for a DVD that is presenting a scope or widescreen film not to be enhanced for widescreen TVs. It’s cheap, it’s bad business, and it degrades their image.
Pam asks what performers I think are underappreciated and/or should have had more prominent careers. Well, the already mentioned (in yesterday’s posts) Tommy Rall. Even though Joel McCrea was a top movie star for years, I feel he was vastly underrated in his later years, and is almost virtually forgotten today. Same with Randolph Scott. I suppose Leslie Parrish was underappreciated and should have worked much more than she did (you will understand this obsession with Miss Leslie Parrish when you read Kritzerland). I’m sure there are lots more, too.
Jose asks what Broadway theater is my favorite. Well, I like the Martin Beck very much, and the smaller houses like the Music Box and the Helen Hayes. I love the Shubert, and the Broadhurst, all those classic houses. Have I been to Angus’ (former host of Joe Allen) new restaurant? I have indeed, because that was the site of our very first Hainsies/Kimlet soiree. Do I think an old-fashioned variety show would work today? This was the first of two questions related to this topic, and it’s ironic that they’ve been asked, as I’m in the midst of developing just such a TV show. Therefore, I cannot say more, other than to say yes, I think it would work, especially what I am designing, which is a fabulous idea if I do say so myself. But mum’s the word for now. Later, the word may be something else, but for now it’s “mum”. “Mum” is currently the word du jour, have you noticed?
MattH asks what my opinions are on the music of Mr. Andrew Lloyd Webber. I think I’ve answered this before – I like some of his stuff very much, and a lot of it not at all. I thought Aspects of Love was the worst tripe I’ve ever seen or heard. But there are parts of Phantom that I like very well, and his Jeeves! musical has some pretty things, and even Sunset Blvd. has some interesting things. But, am I a fan? No.
S. Woody White asks what films have won the Oscar for Best Picture that I wish had been won by another nominated film and why? Well, not that I remember what was up against them, but almost anything other than Gandhi and Chariots of Fire should have won. I think that most years I would prefer a different choice than the one they come up with. Of course, for the last five to ten years, it’s all about money and promotion – whoever pays the most, and campaigns the hardest wins. Have I ever heard the story of The Randy Vicar and the Victrola? I do believe I have and it was most randy.
Laura asks if I remember the first fan letter I ever received. Was it from one of the movies or my TV appearances? I think the first I ever received was before I’d done anything really. I’d acted in a show at City College and then I’d put on the first couple of shows I’d written, and a girl sent me a lovely fan letter and a drawing. We ultimately met, and she’s been an acquaintance and friend ever since, and, in fact, did the drawings that are the main titles of The First Nudie Musical. I do remember getting some fan mail from The Partridge Family, and I got quite a bit during the run of the Dinah Shore series on CBS. I still get nice letters and e-mail to this day. At the time of Nudie Musical, I got tons of letters from fans all over the world, which was lovely. I have them all in storage. Do I remember the first time someone asked for my autograph? Not specifically, no, but it was fairly early in my TV career, that much I remember.
Tom from Oz asks if I like the David Lean epics and if so, which are my favorites. I’ve never been as big a David Lean fan as I should be and I can’t really tell you why that is. I like Lawrence of Arabia but I didn’t love it in the way I loved several other not-as-well-thought-of epics, like King of Kings and Spartacus. I really like Bridge on the River Kwai, I enjoyed Zhivago, couldn’t stomach Ryan’s Daughter, and did like A Passage to India.
Sandra asks if I’ve ever been to the circus. Only once, and only because I was invited by my friend Eric Michael Gillette who, at the time, was the singing ringleader for Ringling Bros/Barnum & Bailey circus. They had a funny clown, and one of the clown’s routines was to take people from the audience and make fools of them. Naturally Eric made sure I was one of those people. Thanks, Eric. Can I juggle? No. Can I ride a unicycle? No. But I can wear a red nose.
Sigerson Holmes once read an early BK’s Notes and noted that I said that someone had been searching for the words “cole slaw”. This has made Sigerson Holmes self-conscious about what words he searches for here at haineshisway.com and asks if that is still the strangest search I’ve noticed or have visitors searched for even stranger things. Oh, much stranger. First, there are two kinds of searchers – there are, as we all know, the merry searchers and I think we all know what the merry searchers are merrily searching for. Then there are the dear reader and the odd visitor searches, and those run the gamut let me tell you. The other day someone was searching for “sex”, for example and found quite a few examples. But please don’t feel self-conscious because, with the exception of the merry searchers who are quite obvious and identifiable, I don’t usually know who is searching for what. So, search away for anything – if you’d like to get the most hits for your search, I would try “Well, dear readers” or “Unseemly Button”. What is the cheapest site that I’ve found to purchase DVDs online? I’m afraid I’ve been errant and truant about doing so, usually because I get them before street date here in Los Angeles, and usually because I have store credit various and sundried places and so they don’t cost me anything (I am constantly trying to thin out this morass of DVDs by trading the ones I’ve watched and will never ever watch again in for other things).
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must start figuring out who to cast on this little album we’re doing, and I must attend two count them two meetings. Then I shall eat various and sundried foodstuffs and then I don’t know what I shall do. Today’s topic of discussion: Let us put on our casting director hats and do Wrong Casting. Today, we are doing a haineshisway.com revival of The Rocky Horror Show. So, let’s hear you most wrong casting choices for all the roles. I, myself, would like to see Steve Lawrence play Frank ‘n’ Furter. Your turn.