Well, dear readers, I am staring at a blank page. On this blank page I must construct notes from whole cloth. Not from half-cloth, mind you, no, I must construct these notes (i.e. write these notes) from whole cloth. You might wonder how you write notes from whole cloth. Well, let me tell you, it is not easy. For example, I don’t happen to have any whole cloth lying around like so much fish. I don’t even have any half-cloth. I’m using a fragment of cloth and yet I am constructing these notes (i.e. writing these notes). I wonder where the expression “whole cloth” came from – as in “he constructed the notes (i.e. wrote the notes) from whole cloth”. If anyone has a clew please keep it to yourself because some things are better off unknown. For example, my marriage would have been better off had I not known my ex-wife. Now, now, I’m not being nasty, I’m just stating my opinion. Had I not known my ex-wife, my marriage would have been much more successful. Or, if I’d made my marriage up out of whole cloth. But I didn’t and deevorce was the result, oh, yes, deevorce was the result. I tell you, I have lost any semblance of coherence in these here notes, haven’t I? I have not one clew as to what the hell I’m going on about, and yet, on I go, unabated and unfettered. Isn’t that exciting? Isn’t that just too too?
I had a perfectly perfect day yesterday. I got quite a bit of writing done (I surprised even myself – no mean feat), I got a few errands done, and then I attended the ASCAP/Disney workshop. This was different than all the others I’ve attended over the years. Tonight’s presentation was the “short form” presentation – I’ve always done the panels for the “long form” presentation. So, tonight we saw two musical do about twenty minutes each. Instead of three panelists there was just me and Paul Lazarus sitting alongside Mr. Stephen Schwartz. First off, may I just say there were quite a few interesting people in attendance, including the likes of Miss Karen Morrow, Mr. Fred Willard, Miss Joanne Worley, Mr. Marvin Kaplan (yes, Marvin Kaplan), along with quite a few chums of mine like Adryan Russ and Doug Haverty. The first musical we saw had a sort of pop-flavored score and was by writers from Vancouver. Most of their cast had flown in on their own dime to participate, and they were a cut above the casts I’ve seen. This musical opened with a terrific number. My usual pet peeve is opening numbers or lack thereof, so it was a pleasure to see one that actually worked and was actually clever. Unfortunately, after that number and the number that followed, everything went downhill. In the opening number they introduced us to this really endearing fourteen year old boy and therefore we all assumed that it was going to be his show – be about him. After scene two, we went away for two long, interminable scenes featuring other characters, and the show suddenly seemed about other things that I just didn’t care about. Then we had a good scene with the boy and his family. Mr. Schwartz said it was the first time in workshop history where all of us agreed to the letter on what was wrong. When Mr. Lazarus and I got through talking, Stephen said there was nothing left for him to say, that we’d hit every nail on the head. I hope the authors keep working on their show – they’re quite talented and actually had a fresh-sounding “voice” in terms of the writing. The second musical, I’m afraid, was just not good, and I was up first to talk about it. I basically said I, who am usually the most verbose, was at a loss for words because I simply didn’t understand what I was seeing. So much information was coming at me in the first two numbers that I just shut down. Ultimately, my comments were all about that I didn’t know what story they were trying to tell me, I didn’t know which character I was supposed to follow, I didn’t feel anything for anyone because I didn’t know anything about anyone. The authors were looking at me askance, but then Mr. Lazarus was able to articulate quite well exactly what I had alluded to, and then Mr. Schwartz was able to synthesize both of our comments into something that made sense. All in all, it was a really fun evening. I said hello to one of the actors, Miss Jennifer Rush, whom I’d enjoyed in Paint Your Wagon. I gave Mr. Schwartz a copy of Writer’s Block, which I’m hoping he’ll enjoy. He gave a nice plug to it when he was introducing me.
Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below so we can move on to the next section of the notes which I shall have to make up out of whole cloth.
Yes, yes, you see how it is? Another blank page, more whole cloth. Today, the pool cleaning man will come and I’m hoping he will make my pool and Jacuzzi clean-as-a-whistle. I’m also going to ask him to clean the filter, which is quite dirty. And tonight, I shall put on some whole cloth and take a nice long Jacuzzi.
Tonight I will be supping with our very own Miss Tammy Minoff. I’ve been helping her by offering sage advice on a project she’s working on. I wonder what and where we shall eat. I also wonder where and what we shall eat. Perhaps we’ll make our dinner out of whole cloth. Perhaps not.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must write a bit, I must print out the pages I’ve done and give them to my muse Margaret, I must do a few errands, and then I must sup with Miss Tammy Minoff. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s Ask BK Day, the day in which you get to ask me or any dear reader any old question you like and we get to give any old answer we like. So, let’s have loads of lovely questions and loads of lovely answers, which will hopefully include a history of the saying “whole cloth”.