Well, dear readers, I am sitting here like so much fish, fighting the good fight against the dreaded allergies whilst having had a bagel, cream cheese, and lox for a snack. I’m listening to the first Ormandy of the day, when I probably should have listened to five. This one’s fun – Holiday for Orchestra – all warhorses from Camptown Races to Jamaican Rumba. I’m currently doing the Jewish Rumba, which involves sitting here like so much fish and plotzing in rhythm. Have you ever plotzed in rhythm? It’s not pretty but it might be considered amusing. Currently playing, When Johnny Comes Marching Home. This is a very old warhorse, so Johnny is as bad as the damn cows, coming home-wise. It’s late and therefore I may as well get to it – the completely nothing-much-to-write-about day that was yesterday. I got just under eight hours of sleep, got up, had the usual e-mails to answer and one obnoxious and irritating text, to which I did not respond. I had clam chowder and a baked potato for food, lollygagged around the home environment when I should have been listening to Ormandy. Now playing, The Sailor’s Hornpipe aka Popeye. It’s fun and makes me want to dance a jig in a jug. These are all new arrangements of the warhorses, well, new circa 1965 or thereabouts. I wonder if I could be considered a warhorse. In any case, after answering the e-mails, I had two long telephonic conversations, the second of which was an interview with a nice woman who is writing a book about all the movie versions of Stephen King’s Carrie. She wanted to know about our first time ever release of the complete score on CD. We chatted for about forty minutes. I have to find the CD – told her I’d send her mp3s. If anyone happens to have it handy and can make me mp3s and send that would be most helpful. Whichever of the two discs is the complete score, not the original LP release, which we included as a bonus. After that, I have the food – I went out of order, sorry – and then at some point, I sat on my couch like so much fish and attempted to watch a movie, but kept falling asleep. I finally settled on a 1966 rarity that I don’t think ever actually played anywhere – called Don’t Worry – We’ll Think of a Title, starring and co-written by Morey Amsterdam, along with Rose Marie, Richard Deacon (his cohorts from the Dick Van Dyke Show), a cameo by Danny Thomas, and other “let’s make a funny face” comic actors. Oh, and a few other cameos – Forrest Tucker, Moe Howard, Milton Berle, Irene Ryan, Steve Allen, Cliff Arquette (as Charley Weaver), Carl Reiner, and Nick Adams.
It is truly perhaps the worst comedy ever made. Everyone mugs, makes funny faces, the dialogue wants so hard to be funny and so isn’t. The director, Harmon Jones, doesn’t seem to have a clew as to where to put the camera or the least notion of how to stage a scene, which is shocking considering he edited Gentleman’s Agreement, The House on 92nd Street, Anna and the King of Siam, Panic in the Streets – you’d think he would have learned a little something having edited those films, but apparently not. He did direct other movies – The Pride of St. Louis and the immortal Gorilla at Large – and directed a few episodes of TV shows like Ben Casey and Perry Mason. Morey and Rosie were great second bananas – neither can carry a comedy on their own but the material and plot is just so unrelentingly stupid, no one has a chance. And there is a special place for Richard LaSalle, the composer, whose score is literally Mickey-Mousing for every bit – and a shameless backwards rip-off of Mancini’s The Pink Panther theme. I was wrong – it never played LA or New York but did play as second feature to several movies for a few weeks in various cities.
Today, I’ll be up when I’m up, I’ll do whatever needs doing, then I’ll relax until it’s time to go to the theater – I’ll probably arrive around five-thirty or six. Then we’ll have a run-through with tracks and keep striving to get things smooth and getting the scenes sharp. I’ll probably run a few things once we’re done.
Tomorrow is exactly the same, with our designer run-through in the evening with tracks. Then we have Monday off, Tuesday I’m taking my car in to check something, then we’re back with full cast and musical director. I still have had no contact with the lighting designer – not good, but hopefully soon. We do run-throughs every night, I do a paper tech at some point, then we have a full-on run-through on Saturday with lights and directly after that a cue-to-cue. Then we’re back on Sunday for what I hope will be a tech with lights early in the day, and then a run-through with everything – costumes and lighting.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, be up when I’m up, do whatever needs doing, relax, mosey on over to the theater, have a run-through and then, if I haven’t eaten, go get something to eat. Today’s topic of discussion: What is the worst and unfunniest comedy you’ve ever seen? Let’s have loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I hit the road to dreamland, happy to have plotzed in rhythm.