Well, dear readers, do you think that in today’s politically correct wussified world that the following commercial jingle could exist: “Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Meyer wiener.” I think not. And isn’t that ridiculous? I’m so mightily bored of all this politically correct behavior and I’m bored of the word “inappropriate.” I’ll tell you what’s inappropriate, baby – the word inappropriate is inappropriate. Shut up already with the psychobabble. Can you imagine the movie Pretty Baby being made today in the same way it was? I think not. And that goes for tons of other movies, as well. There are now so many things in shows that are taboo because we cannot put things into CONTEXT. I remember seeing the Bernadette Peters revival of Annie Get Your Gun and absolutely loathing every change that Peter Stone did to make it palatable for the oh so sensitive ears of today. What, we can’t figure it out that the show takes place a HUNDRED years ago? Or the endless changes to Showboat’s lyrics. We can’t figure out the time period of the show. We’re too stupid to understand that it was different then? It really nauseates me. Or when we see a musical that was written in the 1950s or early 1960s that was then taking place in modern times – and now it seems like the women aren’t like today’s women in terms of equality and everything else. Duh. Really? Ooh, let’s get all George Orwell-like and rewrite history and pretend it was never like that. Yeah, that’s smart, all right. I’ll bet in twenty years’ time someone will say that “African-American” is an inappropriate term, because some new term will replace it. And on it goes. History, baby – it exists. We hopefully get better and more civilized, but we don’t rewrite – we remember and understand it was different. And with that, let us all sing at the top of our lungs: OH, I WISH I WERE AN OSCAR MEYER WIENER.” And I don’t give dick what anyone says about wiener. WIENER, WIENER, WIENER – there, I’ve said it and I’m glad. Believe me, if that jingle came on the air today, some group would be up in arms.
Well, that was a fascinating little rant, wasn’t it? Shouldn’t I be writing some notes right about now? Of course, I can’t get that stupid jingle out of my head now. Yesterday was quite a pleasantly pleasant day. I managed to get nine hours of pleasant sleep, and then I arose. I answered e-mails, printed out more orders, and saw that Until September would be sold out by the end of last night, which it indeed was. I then had some bacon and eggs and toast, then picked up a couple of packages, then did some errands and whatnot, then came home. I did a two-mile jog, and then some work on the computer. Then Mr. Shelly Markham arrived and rehearsals began at three-thirty with Miss Alet Taylor. We ran her three songs – You Can Be A New Yorker, Too (a very funny Strouse song – he did the lyric as well as the music) from Mayor and the first Gardenia song we’ve done to include the “F” word preceded by the word “mother.” The other two songs were You’ve Got Possibilities and Children Of The Wind (from Rags). We had to do some major work on that song because the show version is very fragmented and has a rather bravura ending written specifically for an opera singer – Theresa Stratas to be specific. We fixed it all up and now it seems like a real song.
Next up was Shannon Warne – it’s her first time with us and she was very prepared and what a beautiful voice she has. She did her three songs – the title tune from Rags (also had to do some big cuts, as it’s a duet in the show, with a lot of instrumental), Blame It On The Summer Night (also Rags), and It Would Have Been Wonderful (from Annie Warbucks – sung by Grace in the show, and Shannon just played that part in a production of Annie). Then we had Melissa Mitchell – her first time with us, too. She’s a very talented gal – I saw her do Cinderella out at Cabrillo Music Theatre, and she was also in Annie recently (as Star To Be). She’s the young track in this show and sings Bye Bye Birdie/How Lovely To Be A Woman, A Brand New World (from Rags – you can see I’m very fond of that score), and One Boy. Then we had Paige Befeler and Jenna Rosen, two adorable young ‘uns who are doing You’re Never Fully Dressed Without A Smile with Melody Hollis (they were all in that same production of Annie). Then came Dan Callaway, who’s singing I Lost The Rhythm, Night Song (from Golden Boy), and Dance A Little Closer. Then it was our ensemble gals who rehearsed their part in One Boy. Then Kevin Symons arrived and did his three songs – Once Upon A Time/There’s Always One You Can’t Forget, Baby, You Can Count On Me (from Bring Back Birdie), and Da-Da Da-Da Da-Da (from Bojangles). And finally Melody arrived and did her Annie songs, Maybe and Tomorrow, and her part of You’re Never Fully Dressed Without A Smile. It was fun to have her actually not have to screech Maybe the way they make the Annies do (the key it’s in practically makes you screech those high notes) – but I told her to float the high notes and it just gives the song some depth and feeling and Melody just “got” it right away. And that was that.
Then Melody and her parents and I went over to Paty’s coffee shop in Toluca Lake for a fun dinner. Melody’s birthday is today and she turns thirteen. I adore her and her folks – a wonderful family unit. I then did some work on the computer and suddenly the evening was at an end.
Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below whilst we all sing quite vociferously: OH, I WISH I WERE AN OSCAR MEYER WIENER.
Today, I have errands and whatnot to do and writing to do and hopefully I’ll pick up a package or three – and then I’m meeting Mr. David Wechter and his son for dinner in the Hills of Beverly, after which we’re attending a screening of Bye Bye Birdie at the Academy. I will, of course, have a full report.
Tomorrow, I’ll probably be picking up the tapes to The Fanstasticks film, and then I’m seeing God Of Carnage at the Ahmanson Theater in the evening, preceded by a light but amusing meal somewhere around the Music Center. Friday we have our second Gardenia rehearsal, and then the weekend is a little busy but not too crazy – have to finish liner notes, my contextual commentary, and I have to figure out the show order for the Gardenia show.
Well, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must, for example, do errands and whatnot, do a jog, pick up packages, eat, and see Bye Bye Birdie. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s Ask BK Day, the day in which you get to ask me or any dear reader any old question you like and we get to give any old answer we like. So, let’s have loads of lovely questions and loads of lovely answers and loads of lovely postings, shall we, whilst I hit the road to dreamland singing OH, I WISH I WERE AN OSCAR MEYER WIENER.