Vixmom did present the couple side very well.
I've been in two serious relationships in my adult life. Many of you have met Anthony. He's the second and we've been together 10 years.
The first was also long (9 years). It ended for many reasons but during the good years it was much like Vixmom said, give and take and communication and realizing that your partner is not the same as you and respecting the differences. Now that we have been apart for 15 years we are good friends, something I never ever thought we would be in in 1991 as it was all falling apart around my ears. I'm glad that we had 9 years together but we make better friends than lovers.
I think part of the reason for our (Anthony and me) success is that we didn't live together for a long time. We met in August of 1995 and began dating but he lived on Long Island and had a busy weekend party entertainment business so he didn't come into the city very often. We spoke almost every day but he was on the Island and I was in the city. When we spent time together it was exciting and appreciated. He's been living in the city now for about 4 years and I think we appreciate each other more because we didn't rush into anything.
As Vixmom said, we also have different lives in many ways. Even though Anthony is the "active" actor, I'm the one who goes to the theatre. He rarely goes, even when we get free tickets. I can't imagine not going to the theatre. Even without the BBC Radio gig I would still go to the theatre frequently. I may love all things British, but I confess, mysteries bore me to death (there, I've said and I'm glad). Anthony loves them. He watches Monk and PBS and British mysteries and some of those A&E shows (I don't remember the names) and that's great. He can also get sucked into a Lifetime Movie network film faster than quicksand. I just go in the other room and read or do something on the computer. I enjoy his family and he likes my crazy brothers and sisters and he doesn't even have to. He's an only child so that whole interaction between siblings was a new thing to him.
I think another reason we are happy together is neither one of us was looking at the time for anything (or anyone) so that pressure was gone. We were introduced by a friend and it went from there. I wasn't looking for Mr. Right (or Mr. Right Away) but I found him through a friend.
And one more political statement before I get back to work. Even though much of the world doesn't accept the definition or the relationship I feel as if we are married. If anyone (no one here, I'm not ranting at you people) disagrees, tough sh*t. It's not your business and you can't define my family and my "marriage. Perhaps you can insert some legal bulls*** to assuage your moral outrage at my defiance but again, I don't give a rat's behind what you think. You are not part of our life and we will live happily as husband and husband knowing that we are secure in our past, present and future.
Enough said.