I'm back on the job hunt circuit again. The big opportunity where everyone in the store wanted me hired went bust when the powers that be brought in a new store manager, who not only didn't want to see me, didn't even have the courtesy to come out and meet me herself to say so when I dropped by.
Another bleh.
But I've got some good feelers out as of today.
The one bad feeler was from the Disney Store Outlet, where I was told that a) along with the job application, I would have to fill out info on a credit check -
for a part time sales job? Talk about overkill, no wonder the Disney Store is having problems. And b) I would have to shave off my beard. No matter that I've been facially follicled for over twenty years, and off and on before that. The reasoning given is that "All the Disney villians have facial hair, and they frighten children."
Time for a rant.
Uh, let's see now. In
Snow White, the villian does NOT have facial hair, except for one or two coming out of a mole, while six out of the seven heroes are fuzz-faced. In
Pinocchio, Stromboli has a beard, but Gepetto has a moustache. But the Coachman is cleanshaven.
Bambi is notable for everyone having fur on the faces, even the women.
OK, Captain Hook has a scraggly moustache. But the King and Grand Duke in
Cinderella have full moustaches, and they're good guys. Same can be said of Jim Dear, Tony and Joe, in
Lady and the Tramp. Sleeping Beauty's King Stefan and King Hubert are on the good side, both bearded, while Maleficent is not and is not.
Jasper and Horace Badun are clean-shaven. Merlin's beard reaches to his toes. Mr. Snoops almost has a moustache, but barely, while the husband who (with his wife) adopts Penny has a full moustache. It isn't until we get to
Fox and Hound that the villian, Amos Slade, has a full moustache, the first such outcropping on a villian since Stromboli.
More recently: Basil is "clean-shaven" (or as best a mouse can manage), while Dr. Dawson has a full moustache, as does Hiram Flaversham. Ratigan, meanwhile, has a five-o-clock shadow, not a beard. Sykes is clean-shaven. King Triton has a beard, the best we've seen since Merlin, while Louis, the chef, has a thin whisp of a moustache. Percival McLeach is clean-shaven, as is Gaston, while the Beast is magnificently beasty. The Sultan has a full beard, Jafar a scraggly crinkle, and where would Genie be without his goatee?
Frollo? Bare. Phoebus? Nice tuft on his chin. Zeus is full-furred, Hades can't even brag about a singe of hair on his chin. Claton? Measley little bits of moustache, hardly worth mentioning. Both Tarzan and Jane's fathers have woofy staches, though.
By the way, my favorite Disney hero, Johnny Appleseed, starts out clean-shaven, but as he ages and plants his apple trees, his beard gets longer and longer. And I've always loved his Guardian Angel's moustache.
Rough translation: The Disney Store is full of beans with their notion about who has beards and moustaches and who doesn't.
And let's not forget that Walt himself had a moustache. But not as full a moustache as most of his heroes or good guys. Hmmmm...let's think about this one, this could be suspicious...
