Well, dear readers, here we are on a Sunday which does not feel like a Sunday, nor does it feel like a sundae for that matter. Yesterday did not feel like a Saturday so why should today feel like a Sunday? Perhaps tomorrow will feel like a Monday. What a wonderful beginning of the year we had here at haineshisway.com, filled with merriment and mirth and laughter and legs and Corn Bread. I ate so much Corn Bread yesterday it was simply amaizeing. I ate Corn Bread all the livelong day and night or, as Cole Porter put it, Night and Day. I feel we are off to a fine start in 2005, don’t you? I feel celebratory and like a gazelle in heat. In fact, I feel like doing The Dance of the Seven Veils. Hold on a second.
Drat! I only have six veils. That is so unacceptable. Can one do the dance of the six veils? I mean, one can do the dance of the six veils but it won’t look right, will it? It’s the seventh veil that sets the whole tone for the dance of the seven veils. Without that seventh veil the dance is just so much fish. Where in tarnation did that seventh veil go? I believe an Uncouth Interloper came into my home environment and removed the seventh veil, just waiting for me to announce that I would be doing the dance of the seven veils. I’ll bet that Uncouth Interloper is laughing now. Well, laugh all you like, Uncouth Interloper, but you will be finding out about veil karma all too soon. There will be nothing veiled about the veil karma. I wonder if anyone has a clew as to what the hell I’m talking about, because I sure don’t.
I saw a motion picture entitled The Aviator. I did not care for it too much. It had some nice scenes and the actors are okay (except the rabid obnoxious scenery-chewing of Mr. Alan Alda), but I just never understood the story it was trying to tell. It seemed to have no point of view. I think Mr. Scorsese has lost whatever originality he had, because his movies just resemble everyone else’s now. There is a sequence late in the film of a congressional hearing that is so awful in its direction and sound design I couldn’t believe it. Ultimately, you know nothing about anything in the film, so you come away empty. Oh, and the Kate Hepburn attempt was pretty bad, I thought. Occasionally the voice would be on, and then it would just veer off and be totally inaccurate. The look of the film is, as you’d expect, elegant, but there is just too much CGI junk and I’m totally over CGI junk and don’t want to see any more of it. Every scene has “painting” – and I don’t just mean effects, I mean the grass is computer-painted greener than it would normally be, as are flowers and everything else on the screen. They didn’t have digital colorists ten years ago, and movies were better for it. Somewhere buried in the sound mix is an okay score by Howard Shore. What’s not buried in the sound mix are the endless parade of songs, and the popping of flashbulbs – those you can hear very well indeed.
What am I, Ebert and Roeper all of a sudden? Well, why don’t we all click on the Unseemly Button below whilst I rehearse for the Dance of the Seven Veils Minus One.
I’m telling you, I will find the perpetrator, the thief who stole the seventh veil. That is not a veiled threat, that is the truth, and when I find the perp (as they say in police lingo) the perp will pay. The perp will pay $2.98 plus tax, and then I shall go out and buy a fershluganah seventh veil so that I can finally regale you with The Dance of the Seven Veils.
I received an invitation to go to my friend Barbara Deutsch’s for soup. How is that for a segue? And so, I will be going for soup later today. I know not what sort of soup but soup there will be, and if there are some nutmeats around we will be dining from soup to nuts.
Our very own Mr. Donald Feltham is on vacation and will be back in a week’s time, so there won’t be a new radio show until his return. How’s that for a seque?
Oh, how I long to do The Dance of the Seven Veils and yet I am thwarted from doing so – thwarted, I ell you. Has anyone noticed that I just typed “ell” instead of “tell”. Oh, ell, what can you do. I have been thwarted from typing both a “t” and a “w”, thwarted, I ell you.
Ell, dear readers, I must take the day, I must do the things I do, I must wake up and smell the Diet Coke, I must take a walk, I must drive about in my motor car, I must do this and that and also that and this, and I must go out and purchase that seventh veil, at which time I’ll be in seventh heaven because I can finally do The Dance of the Seven Veils for your audio/visual delectation. Today’s topic of discussion: It’s free-for-all day, the day in which you dear readers get to choose the topics and we all get to post about them. Now, really, let’s have loads of lovely topics on every subject conceivable, and loads of lovely posts, shall we?