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Author Topic: HOW NOW, BROWN COW  (Read 32255 times)

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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #150 on: March 30, 2005, 01:48:02 PM »

and from  the Vixter:

"Anywhere he wants to"


"Here kitty, kitty"


"Orange you glad I didn't say banana?"


"I didn't know you could yodel"



"Time to buy a new fence"
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Jrand74

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #151 on: March 30, 2005, 01:50:23 PM »

"To the dump to the dump to the dump dump dump."
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #152 on: March 30, 2005, 01:50:59 PM »

I'm still winning both auctions.....   :o

that'll teach me... (not punchlines, just observations!)
« Last Edit: March 30, 2005, 01:51:53 PM by vixmom »
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #153 on: March 30, 2005, 01:54:27 PM »

I broke my digital camera.  Apparently you are not supposed to put it in a case, then  drop in on the driveway under the rear wheel of your husband's car  (he barely clipped it when he pulled out in the morning) and then leave it there all night and  all the following day in the pouring rain.

Oddly, the damage is not covered under warranty....

« Last Edit: March 30, 2005, 03:31:45 PM by vixmom »
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Matt H.

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #154 on: March 30, 2005, 01:55:52 PM »

A MILDRED PIERCE remake? Oh, my lord!!!

I won't need any reminders to miss that! It will NEVER play in the 21st century, just like the update of STELLA DALLAS that Bette Midler made didn't make a dime.
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Tomovoz

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #155 on: March 30, 2005, 01:55:57 PM »

Big Band vocalists: Peggy Lee & Margaret Whiting
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Matt H.

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #156 on: March 30, 2005, 01:56:40 PM »

And the PSYCHO and CHARADE redos didn't make a cent.
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #157 on: March 30, 2005, 01:58:35 PM »

I have decided that I need to win the lottery.  I don;t need a big one, just about a miilion clear after taxes.  I want to be a stay at home mom...but I need a bigger house.


The Vixter is READING OVER MY SHOULDER  (YOU BAD BAD GIRL!!!) and she says "AMEN!:

She is aloso making fin of my typos!!! GO DO YOUR HOMEWORK YOU NAUGHTY THING YOU!!!!
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #158 on: March 30, 2005, 02:00:21 PM »

Ok I am being dragged off to teach the Vixter how to sew a  cloth doll...laters!!!
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elmore3003

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #159 on: March 30, 2005, 02:01:10 PM »

Jed, did you tell us that you got a job? Did I miss this news???

Yes, DRJed!  Do we hear the word employment or are you hallucinating from poverty?

"They have crystal balls."

DRJRand54, I've heard a million stories from people who knew Merman, but I've never heard her name mentioned before in the minuet joke.  However, this is a bona fide punchline to an Ether Merman story involving Loretta Young:
"Here's a dollar; go #$%$ yourself!"
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DearReaderLaura

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #160 on: March 30, 2005, 02:01:21 PM »

Yesterday I went for a walk and I saw this juvenile dark-morph red-tailed hawk:
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #161 on: March 30, 2005, 02:03:18 PM »

Isn't DR Jed working at a temp job grading tests?  I seem to remember him telling us about it a week or so ago and that he would be rooming with DR Ann for the duration of the job.

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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #162 on: March 30, 2005, 02:04:58 PM »

I am being urgently requested in the next room...

I look forward to someday hearing  the LEAD INS to all these great punchlines!!!

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MBarnum

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #163 on: March 30, 2005, 02:09:32 PM »

DR JMK, Warner Bros. chat transcript --> www.digitalbits.com
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JMK

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #164 on: March 30, 2005, 02:10:43 PM »

I would like the punchline to the Warner Video chat archive.....   :P
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JMK

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #165 on: March 30, 2005, 02:11:17 PM »

LOL, MB.  Jinx.  (Kind of).
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bk

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #166 on: March 30, 2005, 02:13:59 PM »

vixmom - beware last-second snipers on eBay.  You really shouldn't even enter a bid until just before the auction closes.  If you want some tips, e-mail me.
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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #167 on: March 30, 2005, 02:15:00 PM »

there is a link to the home theater forum chat on the hometheaterforum.com discussion board (software is the name of the section on the board that you'll want to click on - halfway down).
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DERBRUCER

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #168 on: March 30, 2005, 02:31:15 PM »

... chose to contemptuously manipulate the judicial system in order to cynically inflict once more onto society...
 
Now that I tell you is a sentence!  

Yes, it is rare to find two split infinitives in one sentence!

der Brucer (who must confess, any correct rework that comes to mind is awkward and weakens the impact - but, hey, "Rules am Rules".)
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JMK

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #169 on: March 30, 2005, 02:47:24 PM »

Well here's what I'm excited about from the Warner chat:

Brando Mutiny on the Bounty
Ryan's Daughter
SE Ben Hur with both versions

I find it hard to believe that Warner and MGM/UA coexist peacefully--the difference in attention to quality and detail in their DVD releases is truly amazing.
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Matt H.

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #170 on: March 30, 2005, 02:49:49 PM »

I'm happy about the Val Lewton box, I already knew about the Garbo and Flynn boxes, disappointed more information wasn't forthcoming about upcoming musical releases or about the Joan Crawford box coming up.
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Matt H.

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #171 on: March 30, 2005, 02:51:52 PM »

Ah, I will have to give away my THIN MAN single DVD since it's going to be part of the upcoming boxed set along with a disc of extras - 7 discs. Wow! I figured they'd put two films per disc (one on each layer) since none of them apart from the second one is very long.
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DERBRUCER

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #172 on: March 30, 2005, 02:59:46 PM »

Ok I am being dragged off to teach the Vixter how to sew a  cloth doll...laters!!!

To use in Voodoo class?

der Brucer
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DERBRUCER

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #173 on: March 30, 2005, 03:07:02 PM »


We are in deep trouble

#1. We're in more trouble than I imagined! While looking at a house, My brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the North?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, (and has for some time), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff.". . . She also votes!

#2. I used to work in technical support for a 24x7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific." . . . . . . He also votes!.

#3 So my colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the admin. Assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving." . . . . . . . She also votes!

# 4My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car. It's designed to cut through a seatbelt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk. . . . . My sister also votes!

 #5 My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount . . . . He also votes!

# 6 I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned. . . . . . My friend also votes!

#7 My girlfriend and I were picking up some sandwiches from the sub place last week and she asked the clerk which of two sandwiches was better. The clerk didn't have an opinion but did say that the first sandwich was more expensive My girlfriend got a quizzical look on her face and asked, "If that's the case, why are they both listed with the same price on the menu?" To this, the clerk responded, "I don't think we add tax to the turkey." . . . . . The clerk also votes!

#8 I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?". . . . . She also votes

der Brucer
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #174 on: March 30, 2005, 03:17:52 PM »

Yes, it is rare to find two split infinitives in one sentence!

der Brucer (who must confess, any correct rework that comes to mind is awkward and weakens the impact - but, hey, "Rules am Rules".)

He can split my infinitives anytime if he can come up with a sentence with that kind of impact!!

(and ain't it rules is rules?)
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #175 on: March 30, 2005, 03:24:12 PM »

To use in Voodoo class?

der Brucer

No, Spanish class...lets see, in November her History teacher made her make a papier mache sacarpogus

In December her English teacher wanted a mobile

Now her Spanish teacher wants a hand made doll dressed in traditional Niciguaran clothing (I was tempted to give her a GI Joe!)

apparently we have inadvertant;ly sent our child not to the local Middle School but to the Deer Park School of Arts and Crafts..... am I bitter just because my school taxes top $4K a year oh no.....
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #176 on: March 30, 2005, 03:26:27 PM »

Ah, I will have to give away my THIN MAN single DVD

you have my address, right?  ;D
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #177 on: March 30, 2005, 03:29:55 PM »

vixmom - beware last-second snipers on eBay.  You really shouldn't even enter a bid until just before the auction closes.  If you want some tips, e-mail me.

My problem is the dang dial up is so slow I'm not very good at these last minute sniping things....If I REALLY want somthing I look for a  'BUY IT NOW" and pay the extra.... but I would appreciate any tips you might like to offer  :D
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Jrand74

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #178 on: March 30, 2005, 03:31:12 PM »

LOL - Well, DR ELMORE - I read the story in a book of Hollywood Quotes.  It seems that Robert Alton who had choreographed DU BARRY WAS A LADY on Broadway was doing the dances for THERE'S NO BUSINESS LIKE SHOW BUSINESS in Hollywood, and thought he might use some of the same steps in one of the medley numbers for Merman.....whereupon he reminded her of DU BARRY and asked her "do you remember the minuet?"

And the rest belongs to history.  So it may be apocrophyl, but it is a funny punch line.  ;D
« Last Edit: March 30, 2005, 03:32:41 PM by JRand54 »
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vixmom

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Re:HOW NOW, BROWN COW
« Reply #179 on: March 30, 2005, 03:33:17 PM »

Oh! How could I forget this one, and I use this all the time

"What do you mean "WE", paleface?"
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